Punch (51.1866)

August 11, 18G6.J

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

67

WHAT DOES SHE MEAN ?

We are not, very often, so utterly
helpless as we feel in the presence
of this invitation:—

ADVANTAGEOUS to PARENTS.

- A Larly who is educating the daughter
of a clergyman formerly head master of a
Cathedral School, and now Vicar of a Country
Parish, has the privilege of INTRODUCING
a YOUNG GENTLEMAN, who will receive
a superior education on very liberal terms.
Address H. O., &c.

HO, indeed. In fact, we may (and
do) say, Ho! ho! But, seriously,
what does it mean ? The primafacie
impression is, that the ex-school-
master’s daughter is a beautiful and
wealthy little lady, and that the
parents of some eligible little gentle-
man are invited to secure so desirable
a match for their son. The teacher
is “privileged” to say this. The
word is obscure. It is used by a
certain class of religionists when they
only mean that they have got a bit of
luck. But it may imply that the little
lady’s papa has authorised the an-
nouncement. We are quite at sea in
the matter, and to our previous
remark. Ho ! ho ! we are only, as yet,
able to add, Hee, bee, and a delicate
hint that the advertisement may have
attractions for the class whose utter-
ances are akin to Hee haw.

Conversation and Conversion.

What different tastes men have,
and what different things men talk
about! Some bore you with their talk
on the Conversion of the Jews, while
others small-bore you by talking of
the Conversion of the Enffelds. Just
now the latter is by far the more usual
theme for chatter, aud at every public
dinner somebody is sure to make a
speech upon the subject, aud become
for half an hour or so a sort of
“ Enfield’s Speaker.”

CLASSICAL.

Did the old Romans play billiards ?
Very possibly they did, to judge from
the old saying, “ a cue tetigisti.”

AN INDEFINITE FLUNKEYISM.

A Fashionable reporter, in his
account of a marriage between the
son of a peer and the daughter of a
baronet, performed by a bishop the
other day at a church in Piccadilly,
says that after the marriage had been
registered, the wedding party ad-
journed to the house of the bride’s
papa, “where a sumptuous breakfast
awaited them.” He omits, however,
to state, the particulars of the break-
fast which he calls sumptuous. He
does not tell us whether or no that
sumptuous breakfast comprehended
any luxuries more expensive than new-
laid eggs, ham, cold beef, rashers, and
sausages. In the opinion of one who
has had experience enough to be a
competent critic of wedding-break-
fasts in the world of fashion, what
things are necessary to constitute a
sumptuous breakfast? Doubtless, in
relation to the digestive organs, and
the nutritive lunction, a great many
unnecessary things. But different
people have different ideas of sump-
tuousness. Skilled workmen of a
certain class, in receipt of high wages,
have been known habitually to make
their breakfast on ducks and port
wine. This is a breakfast that would
be deemed sumptuous by many a peer.
In the course of a legal investigation
some time. ago, a witness, who had
been the familiar cad of a sporting
man, employed the word “ sumpshus ”
in speaking of certain repasts that
had been partaken of by himself and
others concerned in the case. Being
requested to specify the sort of fare
that he considered sumptuous, he
named rumpsteaks. This ascetic
would probably have esteemed, eggs-
and-bacon .sufficient to constitute a
sumptuous breakfast, and have even
looked upon that meal as worthy of
that epithet if inclusive of bloaters.
The majority of poor curates, we may
be sure, would account a breakfast
comprising hot rolls extravagantly
sumptuous, and there is reason to fear
that there are too many of them in
whose estimation a breakfast would be
rendered sumptuous by the addition
of butter.

FRESH GAME FOR MR. PUNCH.