Punch (56.1869)

Mat S, 1869.]

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

IS 5

REAL BENEVOLENCE.

Field-Marshal Punch having learnt, to his great Surprise, that there were
Hundreds of Beautiful Pictures, by English Artists, excluded this Year from the
E.A. Exhibition for Want of; Space, offered to lend the greater part of tbe Frame
of his full-length Portrait, as the usual Curtain, Pillar, Inkstand, Open Letter,
Gloves, and Cocked-Hat could be seen in several other Works in the Room.

CHIGNONS AND CONFIRMATION.

Young Ladies, your attention if you please to this appalling intelligence :—

“ It is said that the Bishop of New Jersey has refused to confirm young ladies adorning themselves
with borrowed tresses.”

The term “borrowed tresses” is an euphemistic phrase, which means in plainer language
hair that has been grown upon another head than the one which now is wearing it. Girls who
buy this borrowed hair, for the purpose of adornment, are like the jackdaw that went strutting
in the peacock’s left-off plumes. They cheat the eye by seeming prettier and more comely-—
a wag would say more com bly—than they naturally are; and a Bishop is quite justified in declining
to confirm them while they practise this deception, or else it might be hinted that they were con-
firmed offenders.

DISRAELI'S PARTY.

Am—“ Hans Breitrnann gife a l arty P

Disraeli made a party;

What right had they to frown,

If he did it on the principles
In Vivian Grey laid down ?

If a tool to ope his oyster
In Toryism he saw.

And in the Tory peerage,

A collective Carabas ?

Disraeli gave his party

Much pleasure I ’ll be bound.

When in Feel he thrust his dagger,

And turned it round and round.:
When he backed up Lord George Bsn-
tinck

In bis figures and bis facts ;

Oat of place, resisted reason ;

In place, accepted facts.

Disraeli used bis party,

As his stepping-stone to place;

No more scruple in his conscience,

Than passion in his face;

And climbed, and still climbed higher.
And with flap-doodle fed.

Their follies whom he flattered,

And their foibles whom be led.

Disraeli taught his party—

(And they were not slow to learn).
There never yet was principle
But inside out ’twould turn.

That what’s a lie in Whig mouths
In Tory mouths is true :

And Household Suffrage always
Was a genuine Tory view.

Disraeli led his party,

T wo several times to power:

To raise the cost of ruling.

Its character to lower.

Now of ape and now of angel
The part so well did play,

As to perplex plain Tories,

And drive able ones away.

Disraeli had a party—

Where is that party now ?

Like sheep without a shepherd,

Queered where to turn or how.
Yearning for Salisbury’s courage,

Or Peel’s blunt sense of right;

Or following Hardy’s banner.
Straight-forward—the light.

COMFORT IN PARIS.

Describing a fashionable residence in
Paris, a New York Correspondent states
that the chief bed-room is “ extremely com-
fortable,” having—

“ In one corner a piano, on which old masters
are played for private enjoyment.”

Tastes differ, we all know, and what in
Paris is thought comfortable, in England
may be deemed to be exactly the reverse.
Pond as we are of music, we should never
dream of putting a piano in our bed-room.
Fancy the delight of being waked iu these
light mornings about four o’clock, a.m., by
oue’s wife playing the old masters for her
private enjoyment! Why, it would be actu-
ally worse than tbe Waits !

c< Motley’s your Only Wear.”

Mb. Motley is coming. America in the
person of Reverdy Johnson, has had enough
of dinners. Mr. Motley comes in for get-
ting her desserts.