Punch (67.1874)

10

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[July 4, 1874.

IN MEDIO (NON) TUTISSIMUS.

Paddlewioks, hearing of the Collapsible Boat, tries one on his own Principle, and is quite Successful !

REGATTA RAIN.

At Henley the rain you can never restrain,

The glass may go up, hut ’tis perfectly vaia ;

The Clerk of the Weather, with utter disdain,

Washes all the barometers down, in the train
Of his fast-falling thunder-flood, good for the grain,

But not for the nymphs of their finery vain,

Or the swells, who will never their stiffness regain,

Till they ’re valetted well, and have had some Champagne,
And have sworn that they won’t go to Henley again.

The Red Lion’s hostess must snobs entertain,

But no one observes her to greatly complain;

And, by this time, she’s probably used to the rain—

That annual deluge that ne’er seems to wane,

But swells Father Thames till he widens his lane,

And floods the flat meadows, and threatens to reign

O’er the streets of the town, and the Mayor’s bothered brain.

‘‘ Well, what if our fripperies sadly we stain! ”

Cries Corisande, Clara, Matilda, or Jane ;

* We shall have some fine fun, and it’s pleasure, not pain;
Just going to Madame Elise’s again ;

And, as Frank’s, always there, I must go there, that’s plain,
Or some other bright eyes will make play with my swain,
tt ^orP I keep well in hand, since I saw on the Steyne
How he flirted—such doings I really disdain
When a man’s half-engaged—

., 0, Sir Charles, by tne train

Did you come ? What a treat! What a love of a cane !

1 m delighted to see you don’t care for the rain.”

A MIDSUMMER DAY’S THOUGHT.

According to the A.thenceum, a work entitled Searches for Surn-
mei, in various regions, is about to he published. An investigation
ot a similar character has been carried on in this country during
the present season with hut indifferent success.

THE PERMISSIVE PRINCIPLE AT HOME.

Measure to permit Mr. Smith and family to take Mrs. Smith and
Family to Dieppe, introduced by Mrs. Smith [nee Brown). Sup-
ported by the Dowager Mrs. Brown.

Card to permit Mr. Howard de Tomkyns to take Mrs. Howard
de Tomkyns to view Messrs. Silk and Satyn’s Exhibition of
Summer Novelties. Introduced by Messrs. Si’lk and Satin.
Supported by Mrs. Howard de Tomkyns.

Letter to permit Mr. Jones Robinson to pay for his son Tommy’s
visit to Professor Barnum Dryasdust’s Lecture upon the Pacific
Islands. Introduced by the Rev. Dr. Birch. Supported by
Professor Barnum Dryasdust (N.B. Schools admitted at a great
reduction.)

Bill to permit Mr. Thomas Skylark to use and enjoy £50 on
payment of £75, at three months’ date. Introduced by Mr. Moses
Levi. Supported by Mr. Jonas Aaron (officer in the service of the
Sheriff of Diddlesex.)

A Word to the Unwise.

Mr. Punch is pained to notice that there exist certain snoblings,
in good clothing, who, when the National Anthem is performed
within their hearing, omit the usual act of loyalty, and neglect
to take their hats off. Possibly they are fearful lest their long ears
should be seen if they were to stand bareheaded. Mr. Punch
inclines to think this reason is the right one ; for, clearly, no one
but a donkey would, on any other grounds, allow a good old English
custom to fall into desuetude.

A PROFESSIONAL VIEW OF THINGS.

Not many hours ago, an eminent Novelist was observed contem-
plating the outside of his house with earnest attention. He was
thinking, so he told an anxious inquirer, that every story had its
“ tale ” of bricks.