DOI issue:
September 19, 1874
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16939#0126
118
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHART V aRI [September i9, I rt74
KIND AND CONSIDERATE.
Maud {who, with Ethel, has just been invited to go for a Cruise in a friends Yacht). “ Now, the Question is, whom shall we ask to
Chaperone us?—old Mrs. Busbee, or old Miss Majoribanks ? ”
Jack {who is to be of the Party). “ Which is the worst Sailor ?” Maud. “ Mrs. Busbee.”
Jack. “ 0, THEN ASK HSR! For THE SOONER SHE GOES DOWN BELOW THE BETTER, YOU KNOW.”
DISRAELI ON CIRCUIT.
Disraeli on Circuit. Let’s Lope no despatches
^ His pleasant track follow, to bore him at morn :
For well he deserves the repose that he snatches,
Pausing now in the steep upward path he has worn.
The wonderful dreams of unscrupulous Vivian,
The dashing young Duke, who became a Lothair:
These sumptuous visions can’t rest in oblivion,
As our Benjamin talks to the wise and the fair.
We think of him oft, in a library cradled,
Mixing letters with pap in a curious shape,
Then by Rogers with sterling divinity ladled,
And choosing the Angel instead of the Ape.
By force mixed with tact he has reached the high summit
Of power in the world, which men strive for in vain ;
But he measures the depth far below with a plummet
Of genius, and treats it with quiet disdain.
For he is not ambitious, as men take ambition,
Knowing perfectly well the full power that he wields,
And he likes just to look upon life as a vision,
And the gardens of Dukes as Elysian Fields.
A Premier who saunters and gossips and glitters,
Has an epigram ready for any girl-rose,
Marks the sunset that blushes, the red-breast that twitters,
Deserves, Punch declares, his autumnal repose.
For him, while from county to county he ’s vagrant,
Wherever caprice may incline him to go,
May the claret be sound and the pineapples fragrant,
And the pretty girls Tories from chignon to toe !
Those beauties around him may joyously flutter,
And flirt with him gaily, at pic-nic or lunch,
For there is not a man who can epigrams utter
So easy and radiant— except Mr. Punch.
ELIGIBLE TENEMENT.
There are—strange to say—Spiritualists who read Punch. They
may, some of them, be interested by the subjoined advertisement:—
By a Librarian.—“ Outward Bound”—my new Books.
TSLINGTON CEMETERY, FINCHLEY.—For Sale, in the most
J- prominent part of the consecrated ground of this cemetery, a Family
Grave, 9 feet by 7 feet 6 inches, and 12 feet deep, with a first-class Monu-
ment in Marble thereon, the Owner, leaving the neighbourhood, having no
further use for it. Apply by letter, &c., &e.
Can the owner of a grave at Finchley be also one of its occupants ?
Have we Vampires in our midst ? Is there not a Vampire at Isling-
ton ? What else can be the being who advertises his own grave
and monument in Islington Cemetery ? The people of Finchley
must be very glad to learn that he is going to leave their neigh-
bourhood. Such are the remarks which the foregoing announce-
ment may perhaps suggest to timorous believers in dark seances at
which “materialised” spirits present themselves in calico, and
shake hands with their company.
Temperance News.
The Clinic (American paper) says that a German chemist has
produced brandy from sawdust; but we have heard of wood-spirit
before. Is it possible that out of sawdust of cherry-wood he can
make cherry-brandy, and extract “ Robur” from that of oak ?
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHART V aRI [September i9, I rt74
KIND AND CONSIDERATE.
Maud {who, with Ethel, has just been invited to go for a Cruise in a friends Yacht). “ Now, the Question is, whom shall we ask to
Chaperone us?—old Mrs. Busbee, or old Miss Majoribanks ? ”
Jack {who is to be of the Party). “ Which is the worst Sailor ?” Maud. “ Mrs. Busbee.”
Jack. “ 0, THEN ASK HSR! For THE SOONER SHE GOES DOWN BELOW THE BETTER, YOU KNOW.”
DISRAELI ON CIRCUIT.
Disraeli on Circuit. Let’s Lope no despatches
^ His pleasant track follow, to bore him at morn :
For well he deserves the repose that he snatches,
Pausing now in the steep upward path he has worn.
The wonderful dreams of unscrupulous Vivian,
The dashing young Duke, who became a Lothair:
These sumptuous visions can’t rest in oblivion,
As our Benjamin talks to the wise and the fair.
We think of him oft, in a library cradled,
Mixing letters with pap in a curious shape,
Then by Rogers with sterling divinity ladled,
And choosing the Angel instead of the Ape.
By force mixed with tact he has reached the high summit
Of power in the world, which men strive for in vain ;
But he measures the depth far below with a plummet
Of genius, and treats it with quiet disdain.
For he is not ambitious, as men take ambition,
Knowing perfectly well the full power that he wields,
And he likes just to look upon life as a vision,
And the gardens of Dukes as Elysian Fields.
A Premier who saunters and gossips and glitters,
Has an epigram ready for any girl-rose,
Marks the sunset that blushes, the red-breast that twitters,
Deserves, Punch declares, his autumnal repose.
For him, while from county to county he ’s vagrant,
Wherever caprice may incline him to go,
May the claret be sound and the pineapples fragrant,
And the pretty girls Tories from chignon to toe !
Those beauties around him may joyously flutter,
And flirt with him gaily, at pic-nic or lunch,
For there is not a man who can epigrams utter
So easy and radiant— except Mr. Punch.
ELIGIBLE TENEMENT.
There are—strange to say—Spiritualists who read Punch. They
may, some of them, be interested by the subjoined advertisement:—
By a Librarian.—“ Outward Bound”—my new Books.
TSLINGTON CEMETERY, FINCHLEY.—For Sale, in the most
J- prominent part of the consecrated ground of this cemetery, a Family
Grave, 9 feet by 7 feet 6 inches, and 12 feet deep, with a first-class Monu-
ment in Marble thereon, the Owner, leaving the neighbourhood, having no
further use for it. Apply by letter, &c., &e.
Can the owner of a grave at Finchley be also one of its occupants ?
Have we Vampires in our midst ? Is there not a Vampire at Isling-
ton ? What else can be the being who advertises his own grave
and monument in Islington Cemetery ? The people of Finchley
must be very glad to learn that he is going to leave their neigh-
bourhood. Such are the remarks which the foregoing announce-
ment may perhaps suggest to timorous believers in dark seances at
which “materialised” spirits present themselves in calico, and
shake hands with their company.
Temperance News.
The Clinic (American paper) says that a German chemist has
produced brandy from sawdust; but we have heard of wood-spirit
before. Is it possible that out of sawdust of cherry-wood he can
make cherry-brandy, and extract “ Robur” from that of oak ?