Punch (71.1876)

December 2, 1876.]

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

237

" PERIL ! "-COURTSHIP AND PROPERTIES.

(WHAT THE STAGE IS COMING TO.)

GOOD SPIRITS.

A Great deal has recently been written about the wickedness of Drunkards," and it
is consequently satisfactory to find that steps are being taken for their reformation. Even
the papers dealing with "Spiritualism" have devoted their columns to a consideration of
the subject. For instance, in one of these periodicals on November 17th, an advertisement
appears in which a Young Lady offers to cure " Dipsomania " by Mesmerism, on the following
terms—" One Guinea per consultation. Two Guineas a month for Postal Treatment."
Without describing the "consultation" (which must be an interesting interview), Mr.
Punch satisfies himself by publishing a few of the letters of a "Dipsomaniac," who, he
believes, has availed himself of the Postal Treatment,"—pour encourager les autres :—

Letter I.

Dear Madam,

I sat, dear Madam. Meantersay that it's all right. All right, you know—that's
what I mean to say. For he's jolly a good fellow, and—so say all of us. I'm a Tipsymaniac
—meantersay Dipsomaniac. Enclose cheque for postal treatment. I am very miserable.
And so say all of us ! Chorus. Meantersay

Bedient Servant,

Tom—Tom—Tomkins.

Lettee II.

Deae Madam,

It gives me great pleasure to say,
very much better. I receive your box—
mesmeric—pills. They go well with as
good a bottle of port as get anywhere.
'Scuse me. Stop for refreshment. Resume
my letter. Yery miserable. Never felt
better in my life. And so say all of us!
Recommend vou all my friends. You're
jolly good fellow. Done me deal a good.
Quite—different—fellow. Love to Uncle
Dickard—I mean Rick—no, that another
man you don't know. Meantersay

Yours respectfully—kind remembrances,
Tom—Tom—Tommy.

Lettee III.
Deae Madam,

Much better, thank you. Took
all your pills. They go well Avith every-
thing you can set before let's talk of a
man as we find him. Chorus, for let's
drink, drink, drink, my boys. Very miser-
able. Quite cured. No more letters any
necessity, for I'm quite cured. 'Scuse me
—more refreshment. Good night.

Yours grate—gratefully,
Pooe Old Tommy.

I am go—go—going to bed—in my boots.

THE FOUNT OF INSPIRATION.

Me. Punch, having asked to whom we are
indebted for the idea of Elephants at the
Lord Mayor's Show, has received the fol-
lowing answer from a Pillar of Leadenhall
Market:—

Leadenhall Market,
Me. Punch, Sie, Nov. 23, 1876.

My attention having been drawn
to the question respecting who suggested
the idea of Elephants in the Lord Mayor's
Show, I beg leave to say Me. Aldeeman
Caetee called upon me some six or seven
weeks since. 1 said he was the very
Gentleman I wished to see, and introduced
the subject of Elephants in the forthcom-
ing Lord Mayor's Show. The worthy Alder-
man appeared somewhat surprised, and
asked if also the howdah could be pro-
cured. I replied yes, and also the Elephants'
Trunks, and he very kindly replied he cer-
tainly would name it to Sie Thomas White,
having an invite to dine with Sie Thomas
the next day. Otherwise I should have
written to Sir TnoMAS myself upon the
subject.

Although I have had no notice taken of
my idea, I am glad it gave great satis-
faction, and my friend, Mr. George San-
ger, fully entered into the merits of my
Lord Mayor's Show for 1876, with his
thirteen Elephants, and, I am fully under
the impression, the first Elephants ever seen
at a Lord Mayor's Show, for in 1856 we
only had about five Elephants in England.
I remain, Mr. Punch, yours truly,
Philip Castang.
(Purveyor of Ornamental Water Fowl,
Poultry and Pheasants of every _ de-
scription. Foxes, Cubs, Foreign Birds,
8fC, 8fC. Pheasants' Eggs in the Season.
Leadenhall Market, London.)

no place for a nap.

The West London Advertiser announces
an "Extraordinary Case of Sleeping in a
Churchyard." The difference between an
ordinary and extraordinary case of sleeping
in a Churchyard is obvious. Extraordinary
sleepers wake again ; ordinary sleepers
never.