Punch (77.1879)

HAD HIM THERE!

Priest. " You drunken Sot ! The very Beasts of the Field give you a Lesson ! They leave off when they have

quenched thetr thirst."

Paddy. "Yes, yer Riv'rence. Bjt where did the Bastes iver come acrass a Sthrame o' Whlske? ! !?"

bad begins, but worse remains bebind." He had presented a petition
in favour of the Bill signed by 70,000 members of the British
"Women's Temperance Association. This is female representation—
of males—with a vengeance! Why, he asked, should hundreds of
thousands of their fellow-citizens be deprived of their weekly day of
rest because some people wanted to have their beer fresh ?

Why, Punch asks, should some millions of our fellow-citizens be
debarred of their Sunday draught of beer, because a few thousands
can't go into a public-house without making beasts of themselves ?

The Government opposed the Bill in a half-and-half way, and
finally the House settled the matter by (165 to 162) adjourning the
Debate, that Mr. Stevenson might withdraw his Bill, and bring in
another on the same lines,-but less obviously unworkable. Better
cut it for good, says Punch, and don't come again.

Thursday (Z,ords).—Earl Stanhope's unsatisfactory Bill, which
under shadow of amending the Public Health Act gives powers for
creation of denominational burial-grounds, passed into Committee by
117 to 69, after a vain attempt of Lord Kimberley to stay its pro-
gress. A distinct step backwards in burial legislation.

(Commons.)—Another night carbone notanda—of which Punch
declines to bottle any of the noxious essence.

The Speaker having stationed two of the Committee Clerks in
the side gallery to take a fuller note of the night's discussion than
that supplied him in the usual course by the Clerks at the table,
Messrs. Callan and Parnell chose to challenge this as an act
of terrorism, meant to overawe Irish Members ; and on the Speaker
taking the chair to explain that the step had been taken by his
direction and for his information, and that the minutes supplied
him had no reference to particular Members of the House—either
Irish, Scotch, or English—Mr. Parnell and Mr. O'Connor Poaver,
amidst indescribable excitement, not only challenged the Speaker's
authority, but actually charged him with a breach of privilege. Yet
the lights did not burn blue, nor did the roof fall in to crush this
parricidal pair !

Let the Kilkenny Cats fall foul of the Marine and Army Cats

and welcome, but when they lix thur sacrilegious claws in the
Speaker's wig, Punch stands aghast, and declines to do more than
record the awful deed of impious daring !

Most of the night was waste! in denunciation of this unprece-
dented outrage on the sanctity of the Chair. But after the long
and furious storm had blown over, such progress was made with
the Army Discipline Bill that, somehow, in the small hours, the last
clause was reached ! For this relief much thanks !

Friday (Lords).—In spite of an honest Protestant wail from Lord
Oranmore, the Irish University Bill went through Committee, on
its way to L. S. D., or to Limho. Who can say ? We back Limbo.

(Commons.)— The House rallied round the Speaker, in a phalanx
of 421 to 29, against Mr. Parnell and his knot of supporters,
mostly Irish, but with some half-dozen English Pntransigentts
among them.

The Collective Wisdom feels that its authority must be supported
in the person of its chosen head—who, if its "servant," as Mr. Par-
nell calls the Speaker, is its steersman and sailing-master also.
The only alternative before the House is to maintain its respect for
itself, or to forfeit that of the country. Irish indiscipline must
bend, or be broken. Eor once we defy even Mr. Gladstone to find
a third course.

highly objectionable.

Our Oxford Correspondent telegraphs that the Temperance Society
has memorialised the Council of the University against their proposal
to grant the Degree of B.N.S.

An Irish Fact for Daravin '(latest example of development).—
Making cat's paws out of cat's tails.

The Funeral of the Prince Imperial.—Personally conducted—
not politically.