Punch (77.1879)

November 22, 1879.] PUNCH, OE THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 229

THERE'S A DIVINITY DOTH HEDGE," &c."

Juvenile "Scold." " Yer nasty little Thing ! if yer Father wasn't a
P'liceman, I'd smack yer !"

A BAAL LUMINARY.

Dear Mr. Punch,

As I know you are interested in the cause of Education, as well as in
everything which concerns the weal of our down-trodden country, I send you
the subjoined extract from the Clare Independent and Tipper'ary Catholic Times
of November 8th, which will, I hope, convince you that the "Island of the
Saints " is now, as it has ever been, in the van of intellectual progress.

Yours, An imsrf Patriot.

EDUCATION, Elementary, Intermediate, Collegiate, and University.—Mr. K.,
Visiting Tutor, Teacher of the Greek, and Latin Classics, and of the French, Italian
and English Languages. Youth instructed from the earliest elements of the English
language, through all the gradations of Intermediate, Collegiate, and University Educa-
tion, qualifying them for the Competitive Examinations for all Civil, Naval and Military
appointments.

The French language of which Mr. E. possesses a most critically accurate Pronunciation
as to its Elisions, Intonation and Modification of voice, he teaches with that graceful
Undulation of sound which particularly characterises a well-bred Parisian. Let it not,
therefore, he inferred that it is French as it is usually taught by uneducated Governesses,
and by many of those Illiterate Foreigners, with their Grammaires, Yocabulaires, and
Indispensables, &c, &c.

Besides being the Literal Translator of a number of Moore's most popular melodies
and other Songs into Greek, Latin, French and Italian of the same Metrical Composition
and Rhythmical harmony as the originals, and which, therefore, can be sung and played
to the same airs, Mr. E. can also produce numerous escapades of his own composition in
the way of hymns, songs, &c.

In evidence of what Mr. R. here states of himself, he can produce the written testimony
of the most exalted in rank, the most dignified by profession, and the most eminent in
learning of all religious denominations in this kingdom.

A series of adult evening classes will also be opened of which due notice shall be given.

N.B.—Mr. R. purposes publishing a series of his letters of correspondence with parties
of distinction in high literary circles, as time and space will hereafter permit.

Q,uotk the Kurfurst.

" I notice that a rather prominent portion of the German press takes delight in running
down the English Navy."—Daily News Berlin Correspondent.

" Better that than that a prominent portion of the German Navy should take
delight in running down each other."

THE NEW (ENONE.

An Epic Fragment.

{With Apologies to the Poet Laureate.)

0 British Public, many-fadded public,
Queer British Public, harken ere I die !
It was the bright forenoon: one silvery cloud
Had with soft sprinkle laid the gathered dust
Of Mayfair. To the studio they came.
Scant-robed they came before the Camera.
And at their feet was laid a carpet fair,
Lemon, and cinnamon, and ghostly grey,
Purple, and primrose. And the artist rose
And overhead the swift spring-curtains drew
This way and that in many a subtle shift
For fine effect of light and shade, and placed
Background of statuary and drooping boughs,
With cloud and curtain, tower and portico.

0 British Public harken ere I die !

1 heard great Here. She to Paris made
Proffer of popular power, public rule
Unquestioned, an elastic revenue
Wherewith to buoy and back Imperial plans,
Honour (with Peace) she said, and tax and toll
From many a Place of Arms and haven large,
And Scientific Frontiers, and all else

That patriotic potency may crave ;
To aU most welcome, seeing men in power
Then only are like gods, having attained
Rest in another place," and quiet seats
Above the tumult, safe from Dissolution,
In shelter of their great majority.

0 British Public harken ere I die !

She ceased, and Paris held the golden fruit

Out at arm's length, so much the thought of power

Flattered his spirit; but Pallas where she stood

Somewhat apart, her straight and stately limbs

Uplifted, and her aspect high, if cold.

The while above her full and earnest eye

Over her firm-set mouth and haughty cheek

Kept watch, waiting decision, made reply.

41 Unselfishness, high honour, justice clear,
These three alone give worth to sovereign power.
Yet not for power (power of itself
Is a base burden) but to hold as law
The fiat high, ' Be just and do not fear,'
And because right is right to follow right,
With a serene contempt of consequence."

And Paris pondered, and I cried, " 0 ! Paris,
Give it to Pallas ! " But he heard me not,
Or hearing, would not heed me. Woe is me !

0 ! British Public, many-headed Public,
Crass British Public, harken ere I die !
Audacious Aphrodite, beautiful
Fresh as the purple hyacinth's rain-washed bells,
With soft, seductive fingers backward drew
From her bold brow and bosom her long hair
Auricomous, and bared her shining throat
And shoulder ; on the carpet her small feet
Shone lily-like, and on her rounded form,
Between the shadows of the studio blinds,
Shifted the cunning " high lights " as she moved.

0 ! British Public, harken ere I die !

She, with a subtle smile in her bold eyes,

The herald of her triumph, well assured,

Half whispered in his ear, " I promise thee

The negative of my next photograph ! "

She spoke and laughed, 1 shut my eyes in fear,

And when I looked, Paris had not the apple.

And I beheld great Here's angry eyes

As she withdrew from forth the studio door,

And I was left alone within the place!

THE wheel within our wheels.

Lord B.'s proposed motto for John Bull, "Imperium
et Zibertas." What would he say to " Imperium in
Imperio ? "

vol. lxxvlt.