Punch (99.1890)

Latest from the Lyceum.—With a view
™ supplying the entire world with, the current
number, Mr. Punch goes to press at a date
roo early to permit of a criticism of Ravens-
™°od. So he contents himself (for the present)
j?y merely recording that at the initial per-
formance on Saturday last all went as happily
J; merrily," with so sombre a plot, is not
™e_word) as a marriage-bell. There was a
striking situation towards the end of the
^ama which was both novel and interesting.

Iavrsra received and deserved a grand
teoeption, and it was generally admitted that
amongst the many admirable impersonations
which Miss Ellen Terry is celebrated,
J\e* Bride of Lnmmermoor appropriately

takes the cake ! "

MY PRETTY JANE.

{Latest Version.)

. [It is said that the price of wheat and the mar-
J^ge-rate go together, most people getting married
When wheat is highest.]

Mr pretty Jane, my dearest Jane,

Ah, never look so shy,
■out_meet me, meet me in the market,
When the price of wheat rules high.
Ihe glut is waning fast, my love,

And corn is getting dear;
wood (Hymen) times are coming, love,
Ceres our hearts shall cheer.
Then pretty Jane, though poorish Jane,

Ah, never pipe your eye,
But meet me, meet me at the Altar,
For the price of wheat rules high!

^es.'name the day, the happy day,

I can afford the ring;
■* *eorn rules high, the marriage rate

Mounts up like anything;
a he " quarter " stands at fifty, love,

Which, for Mark Lane is dear.
Uur wedding day is coming, love,
wr married course is clear.
Then, pretty Jane, if poorish Jane,

Ah, never look so shy ;
But meet me, meet me at the Altar,
When the price of wheat rules high!

September 27, 1890.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI

And we cannot run dangers to plump up
T your wealth,

Until you can show us a clean bill of health,
Which nobody can assert.

And as to that cudgel tucked under your arm,
*ou fancy, perhaps, it will act as a charm.
•No, Jonathan! John to your argument's
dull, [his skull,

And you will not convince him by cracking
Which nobody can suppose.

The Gaul and the Teuton seem much of my
mind,_ _ [find

*ud, despite your new Law, you will probably
J-hat Yankee Inspectors, plus menaces big,
-Rehabilitate not the American Pig.

Which nobody can affirm.

Np,^ Jonathan, Johnny feels no animosity,
-■ie d like, with yourself, to have true Reci-
_ procity; [stroke,
Sjv* neither your Law, nor a smart cudgel-
Will make him—or them—buy your Pig m a
Poke— Which nobody can particularly

wonder at, after all; now can

they, Jonathan ?

TAKEN ON TRUST.

Viscount Conamorey (whose recollections of the antique are somewhat hazy). "Aw—a—what

beautiful akms and hands 'vou 've got, MltS. bounder i they remind me of the venus

of Milo's ! " Mrs. S. {who has never even seen the Venus of Mild). "Oh! you Flatterer I"

„ 'Nomine Mutato." — For some weeks
an61 j was a considerable amount of eorre-
Xitf » 06 in-the Times- anent " Ecclesiastical
the + • w^on suddenly disappeared. Was
topic resumed one day last week under
««ln?.w' fading, " The Symbolical Repre-
sentation of Ciphers?"

AN INVOCATION.

{By a Town Mouse.)

Come back to Town! Why wander where

The snow-clad peaks arise ?
Our English sunsets are as fair,

With red September skies

. Soft is the matu -

aSS/ \ tinal mitt

<Sf!i ^^i- —- Through which

isk if^Jv -r~~- ihetreesloom

Jr^L 1>rown ;

°^HBfcvSM|^toi Come back, if

jfe^mJip only to be

___: tiaf— Come biek to

Y SH| Town!

38 I l^aHl M |f| -*4 For evermore,
W 'rf* ^SSfiL. 'i» ™ days
ii^l'JJ&*«S these,

When musing

a Wf'^WvL on y°ur ■'aoe'

U ffl jOfJgt ^y sacl imagina-
ftj Pjfflf^^^^^ tion sees
v ■*>' '^HsP^ Ar>other in my
"~ place.
Sav, do you listen tu his praver,

Or slay him with a frown ?
At any rate I can't be there.

Come back to Town!

Why linger by some far-off lake

Or Continental strand?
St. Martin's Summer comes to make

A glory in the land.

The river Tuns a golden stream

Where Wren's great dome looks down ,
Thine eyes, methinks, have brighter gleam;
Come back to Town!

I hear your voice upon the wind,

In dreamland you appear;
But do you wonder that I find

The day so long and drear ?
Lentis adheerens hrachiis come

Once more my life to crown;
Without thee 'tis too burdensome.

Come back to Town!

MR. PUNCH'S DICTIONARY OF
PHRASES.
At an Afternoon Call.
" So glad to see you at last. Now don't let
me interrupt your talk with Mrs. Vereker ;"
i.e., "If J do, I shall be let in for being
button-holed."

"Do let me get you some tea—you must
be dying for a cup ; " i.e., " Know Jam."

" So sorry—I fear everything is cold. Do
let me have some fresh tea made for you ; "
i.e., "He can't accept that offer."

In a Non-Smoking Carriage.
" You don't mind my cigar, do you ? " %.e.,
"I know he does, but I'm not going to
waste it."

(Reply to the above query )
"Oh, not at all!" i.e., "Beastly thing!
If he wasn't so confoundedly selfish and
stingy, he'd throw it away."