Punch: Punch (101.1891)

July 18, 1891.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 29

unpleasant a dilemma—the remaining cracks of her revolver,
together with the two next stanzas, are drowned in a fresh torrent
of small-talk—after which he hears Miss F. B. conclude icith
repressed emotion :
But the ochre on Blue-nosed Owl was blurred, as his braves concluded their
brief harangues

And he dropped a tear on the early bier of our Prairie belle, Lobelia Bangs !
[ W/itch of course leaves him in a state of hopeless mystification.

To-day came across a Peep-Boer-
Show. Seen it all before. Also a kind
Soc, Chat. Is that the end f Charming! Xow we shall be able to of Punch-and-Judy performance going-

old Drttmmy; he can bring it out in his new Persian Joe Miller.
Cheeky little street-boys give you Capers'
sauce. They can lead you a pretty dance
if you chivy them.

Amusements of the Boers.

talk again! &c, &c.

on, translated into South-African dialect.
There was not a paying public to witness
r - r, .-«.-.•..-- . a-,in it; and, with all mv desire and with

Uhh IU IVIAon tnLAINiU. CTCiy intention to "encourage native

(By Oar Own Grandoljrfi.) talent, I was compelled to turn away,

,TTiTT»n tt?tttm> r< \ "more in sorrow than in anger,"

(LHLKD LL1 ILK. L.j , (Shakspeare again—Samlet's Ghost, I

Lands-cafe Politics. \ think,) when the pipe-and-drummer

Haven't time to send j"ou much information this week, as We,— man came to me for a contribution. Not
the firm of Self and Corresponding Captain,—have had to a penny in my pocket. " I will reini-
write rather a heavy packet for the Daily Graphic. I suppose burse thee nobly," said I, "on my
you will have got Herr Von German Emperor with you by the return from the Mine-land." He quoted
time you receive this from yours truly ; or His Imperialness may some line or other, which I did not
have quitted your,—that is, our, though I'm here now,—hospitable catch, and gave the name of the "writer,

_____ one "Walker,"

ciated in my mind

with an English
Dictionary, but,

though it has Native Masher from
been much added Masherknd.
to m recent years,

I doubt whether the words the Showman
used on this occasion can be found in my
pocket edition, or in any other edition of that
excellent and trustworthy compilation.

Change of Hair.
Called at native barber's to-day. Gave him
no instructions. Thought of course he was
going to cut it ; and so fell asleep. I almost
always fall asleep when under the mesmeric
influence of a capillary administrator. I should
like him to keep on doing it; cut and comb
again. So soothing! Woke up and found
myself—like this. {Sec Hair Cut.) Here-
with please receive portrait, and treasure it.
Ark a YmVMQJTE.
Must send you a sketch of some of our
B.B.B.'s, or the Bold Bobbies of Basuto all
armed. Ha! ha! asdearoldWoLFFVwouldhavc
said, " I was quite all-armed at seeing this! "

Hope to be on the track of Tom Tiddler's
Isative Amusements-" A Poor House. ^ goon_ But anyll0W tffl I am mr

hospitable of all Shores—Captain Shaw—of the Eire-and-Water
Brigade. My companions—"Jolly companions everyone"—the
Cautious Captain, or the Wily" Williams, Doubting Doctor,
Energetic Engineer, all well. Wily Williams hard at his MS.,
giving an account of the "agricultural and mineral resources " of
the What-can-the-Matterbeland, "through the instrumentality of
the Chartered Company." He's great at this. Think I shall start
new Company—"The Chartered Libertine." If my memory

doesn't fail me, that's a Skak-
spearian title. But who was the
" Chartered Libertine " ? I notice
these South-African States are
independent of Home Government.
'Pon my word, I fancy W. E. G.
was right about Home Kule. On
whose shoulders can the G. 0. M.'s
mantle fall, without enveloping
him in entire obscurity, except on
those of the Leader of the once
united, but now fractured quar-
tette party, "quorum pars magna
fui ? " 1 still keep up my Latin,
you see. I wasn't sent to Eton
for nothing ; nor was any other
boy that I 've ever heard of;

shores. A jwopos of Hospitable Shores, renieinber_me to thejmost j la tache "on the spot," any one of these letters of mine (emphasis on

the "mine") of which all are genuine—"proofs before letters" you
have in my signed promise—is well worth a hundred pounds, and
cheap at the price. It's my note of hand in exchange for the cash,—
for the "ready ay ready! " as we say at sea. Away to the fields
of gold! Pbospecttng Possibilities.

N.B.—Bather think I am going to call on Queen Zambili this
afternoon. Ahem ! Do you remember the ballads of " My heart is
true to Poll," and " The King of the Owj/hecs" f Again, ahem!
" Black Queen to mate in three moves." Of course, can't go m for
this sort of thing myself, but by deputy, eh? Ilepresentativo
Government and Ling Proxy the Eirst, with myself for Prime
Minister. How's that Empire ?

From Our Own Ben Trovato. — Said an artistic collector to
Mr. Parnell, "Now I'II show you a beautiful specimen of Carlo
Dolci." "I wish you could have shown it me some days ago,"
replied the Ex-misleader of the Irish Party, "when I was pre-
sented with a specimen of Carlow without the Dolci."

Capers.

Xo wonder we've had so many
dancing parties at the Cape, when
all the inhabitants are Capers.
Caperycornamental Hidi-dressing. I make this a present to my dear

Cook's Tourist Prize Jubilee Joke.—Mem. fur Travellers
contemplating a first visit to the Continent.—Hems raw to the
business, get Cook'd. Depend upon it, you won't be " done."

"The Hundred Best Books."—Punch's Half-Yearly Volumes
from the commencement, i.e., July 17, 1841, to June 27, 1891.