Punch: Punch (101.1891)

114 PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [September 5, 1891.

COUNTRY-HOUSE PETS.

The Morning-Room at Glen-Dimity Castle, after Lunch. Mr. Belamy Tabby is singing " Hi tiddley hi ti, hi, ti, hi!"
The Duchess. "How clever and amusin' your Friend, Mr. Whatshisname is !—Tabby, isn't it? So good-lookin' and

GENTLEMANLIKE too ! QUITE a godsend on a rainy Day like THIS, WHEN all the men are OUT SHOOTIN' or FlSHIN', or some-
THING ! Is he Married ? "

Noble Hostess. "Oh yes ; but what's so Nice about him, he doesn't mind bein' asked without his Wife. Those sort of
Persons so often expect their Wives to be asked too, and that's such a Bore, you know i"

Her Grace. "Yes ; how Sensible of him ! I must get him to come to us at Brasenose Towers ! "

THE CANADIAN "SEARCH-LIGHT."

(A Song of Sincere Sympathy.)
Air—" The Slave in the Dismal Swamp."

In dark fens of the Dismal Swamp
The Search-Light sends its ray!

"What is that hideous oozy tramp ?

What creatures crawling 'midst jungle damp
Scuttle from light away ?

Revealing radiance shine, oh shine,
Through black bayou and brake,
Where knotted parasites intertwine,
And through the tangles of poisonous vine
Glideth the spotted snake.

AVhere hardly a human foot would pass,

Or an honest heart would dare
The quaking mud of the foul morass, [grass,
WTith rank weed choked, and with clotted

Fit for a reptile's lair.

They dread the light, do those dismal things,

Its gleam they dare not face.
Their snaky writhings, their bat-like wings,
Their quaking menace of fangs and stings

Make horror of the place.

All things should be so bright and fair

In a land so glad and free ;
But the Search-Light layeth dark secrets
bare,

And shows how loathsomeness builds a lair
In a land of Liberty.

Push on, brave bearer of piercing Light,

Through pestilential gloom,
Where crawls the spawn of Corruption's night!
Deal out, stout searcher, to left and right,

The cleansing strokes of doom.

That fair lithe form in that fleet frail bark

Is a comely Nemesis,
Before whose menace 'tis good to mark
The reptile dwellers in dens so dark

Driven with growl and hiss.

The saurian huge and the lizard slow,

Feul shapes of ruthless greed,
And the stealthy snake of the sudden blow,
All owl-like shrink from the Search-Light's
glow, _

Or fly with felon speed.

Corruption's spawn must be chased and slain,
Scourged from the wholesome earth.

It clingeth else like the curse of Cain.

Smite, smite like hail upon garnered grain,
These things of bestial birth !

Old Doggerel Re-dressed.

{After reading certain Criticisms on certain Novel-
ists, certain Comments on those Criticisms, and
certain Rejoinders to those Comments.)

Little novelists have little critics,
Like little gnats, to bite 'em ;

Those little critics have lesser critics,
And so ad infinitum !

LINES BY A LE WISH AM WITLER.

The Penn is mightier than the sword —

Of any Red-Rad whipster.
I said he'd win—doubted my word;

But I'm the 0. K. tipster.
Rads roughed on me and called me '' Bung;'

I 've bunged them up—a corker—
At the result their heads thev hung.

They whip the Witler ? Walker!
We 're the l'enn-holders. For their man

That One-Six-Nine-Three nicked him,
Witlers warmed up " Old Warmingpan; "

Penn gave him odds, and licked him.
" Yilladom " did its duty—game;

Rads jeered it; that's their mania.
Lewisham ? No, we '11 change the name,

And call it—penn-Sylvania !

Tip by a Tory. — The Star, talking of
"Hodge's Political Salvation," says that
Mr. Gladstone has given the Liberal country
programme in a sentence, /will give it in a
word. It is all " Hodge-podge ! "

Unattractive Combination.—If a young
woman is "fast," and uncommonly ugly,
wouldn't she make a great mistake were she
to combine the two qualities, and be " fast-
'idious " f

Name for a Certain Section of the
Illustrated Press.—The Nude Journalism.