Punch: Punch (101.1891)

September 5, 1891.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

119

SOLOMON PELL IN ALL HIS GLORY. ^ ^ ^ ^ Sir, fur from it, Sir-^r

A DUkensian Dream at Plymouth. , " A ^ 7$** B™ gets all the honours, and most of the emolu-

" ments, whilst the Blue Bag, too often, is sent empty away, is it

' Boy ! " cried Mr. Solomon Pell, in the tones of a severe Stentor. just ? Is it judicious ? What says once again the Plymouth oracle ?
The small Boy with the Big Blue Bag responded promptly with a " ' I ask whether it is wise or prudent on the part of the State to
deferential "Yussir." leave unnoticed and disregarded the higher aspirations and ambitions

" Listen ! " pursued Mr. Pell, with dignity. And he read with of a large and useful and powerful class of the community Y
emphatic elocution from some closely-printed columns in the Tunes, , '' No, Sir—a thousand times no! Let our ' higher aspirations ' be
interjecting exclamatory comments from time to time. considered. Some of us have souls above six-and-eigntpence, and

" ' When we remember the importance of the work daily intrusted yearnings beyond bills of costs. Let 'em be gratified, Boy ! "
to Solicitors {Important, indeed!), and the amount of industry {Quite "Oh, please Sir, yussir ; let 'em! Immediately—if not sooner,
so .'), judgment {Exactly !), learning {I believe you!), and integrity Sir ! "

( Why, cerfnUy !), it involves, and the responsibility which is neces- " By the State—with" a capital S ! If a soldier may carry a Field
sarily incurred by them in advising, not only in public and political Marshal's baton in his knapsack, why, why should not a Solicitor
matters, but in all the details of private transactions, the dealings carry a Baronetcy in his Blue Bag ? "
with property, and matters affecting not only the purses, but the1 " And Ekker answers, 'Why?' Sir."

honour and reputation {Ah ! !.'), of the members of the community " I beg your pardon, Boy, it is the Times, not the Echo, which so
(Well, and pointedly put, Boy /), and when we remember, in addi- answers. The Times says :—

tion, what a powerful and (on " 'They (Solicitors) are the

the whole) respected body they k-**=^ guardians of our dearest (yes,

are {I should think so!)—a rl*^ our dearest) interests, the

body, too, consisting not \f\Mb$m confidants of family secrets,

merely of a "fortuitous con- iPEmI ^ne arbiters in family con-

course of atoms" {I should *W ^^Sp i troversies, and not infre-

say not, indeed! Fancy me quently the custodians of the

being a mere " alum,'' or for- ./fSjflrajfty honour and the good name of

tuitous!) ("Please, Sir, I r'^jMmP^^S their clients.'

can't;" interjected the Boy Ml^Bm ^S^k "Quite so. Why, Boy,

with the Bag)—each going his i /WMP^9&*^'<. slrSc! did we let out the Secrets of

own way, and seeking his own ^^M ' " ^ i^aBPfiL the Blue Bag, the contents

interest, but bound together, 0*™W~ " ■ 1,1 °^ Nick's Sack, which

as the great bulk of its mem- j&m^ ''^Ifflfw that 'stupid old snuff-

bers are, and organised by l^-slPr w£^lFt~^ colour'd son of a pun,' Saint

means of this great Society, Wj&jr *\ iPPl Medard ' cut into slits on the

and of the kindred societies ^'j^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ ' -^d^Sea } shore' would be

it—it seems most surprising ' J^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^-^ - think, wotsomedever! "

Sir /) that so little in the way ^^Hpf "i 'ff^^^^'^^T\^K^^Pfe come, Boy ! In Mr. William

of dignity and reward can bo WmMBsS^ ^M^m^Bmm^^KB^S^^^t^^ ^ Melmoth Walters's speech I

looked forward to by the l-S-'^^M^i Iffi 1bmM^^^SL^^^^^^^^^^~^' see ^e aawn °^ ^,

Solicitor, however honestly, ^KStfflEM V^^SSm^^^tS^1^^^^^^^''" " ' The Profession, it is

ably, and conscientiously he Wl'^Wm B|l^^B''y'' = rr true, does not receive in any

may perform the arduous and fpSrllSl r^^PiaB^^Bjl' ® ' up great measure those official

responsible duties of his pro- ^m^p^t* ^mW^^BT^'*' i----r"""~-~~"' ! '.mj dignities and rewards which

fession.' " tS§T Wr%± ttmMWNmr ' ----~" li the President claims on its

Mr. Pell here paused, and *9MHF "A'l ° § behalf, nor are we quite

panted, like one who comes to ^jBjHf ; »«• - ------ VM confident that, if it did, the

the surface after a deep-sea *, /■rmMy*'*' \WM>$m s"~-----------! ' m fact would increase the cen-

diye^Then he pursued^:— _ If^'^^lfL • W^W ' " 'I' ^ence^or tllL' respect ef its

from the opening speech of the Mffc ''~ W/^im ' ' '% ' |—----; "i W- "Well, the Times may

President of the Incorporated ~^Ww' V^^^^a^" ^Jmlm& - "11^ | 'jflE n°t be 4 quite confident.' ^1

And excellent it is,—though ^^j^fe^^^^^^P^^ .^^jW^^^^p W- clients lie, I'm sure. Remove

perhaps a little long-winded. • _ k iiiSsggg^^ * - that Blue Bag, Boy! Won-

As a mere sentence, a sinu- -^^i^i^V^^^^^'^^Lr-—-__..- _ ___;^j^i^=^f^^^= der what Mr. Pickwick's

ous sequence of words, a yWff^rz-- r~— = ~^==^-Jr-~\z ' ■ ■ - SSSlilssiiS^sE opinion of Mr. Walters's

' breather' in syllables, an "^fej5-gg£~g~I...^-----—' speech would have been, and

exercise in adjectives, it.cuts '-^^^TL^r^r^zZ--Zi_^-. r^^Trz^zr— -^^-^-•^^-'^■-t'—" that of the Wellers, father

the record and takes the cake. and son! [Si?igs.

But look, Boy, at the sound common-sense of it! Since the famous,
if flattering, remarks—concerning Me !—of my late friend, the
ex-Lord-Chancellor, who said — nay, swore, that ' the country
ought to be proud of me,' I have met with no observations
concerning our Profession which so commend themselves to my
judgment."

"Oh, please Sir, yussir, right you are, Sir! " jerked out the Boy
with the Bag.

" Right Mr. Melmoth Waltees is," corrected Mr. Pell, severely.
"I knew it would come, Boy, and it has. Though it has taken
time, it has taken time. Listen yet further, and don't fidget with
that Bag!

" 'I contend {He contends!) that it is the duty of the State to

Erovide due recognition of merit in the ranks of a Profession which
as been set apart {Dedicated, as it were, like a—like a—sort of a
scapegoat—ahem ! no, not that, exactly, either, but—a—you know,
Boy, you know !), and regulated {Just a leetle too much, perhaps) by
it, from which so much is expected, and to which so much is
confided.'

Splendid! My sentiments to a touch! Sir, that Blue Bag is a
Temple of Sacred Secrets, and should be a shrine of Open Honour.
{Must make a note of that for my next speech at the Forum !) ' Sir
Solomon Pell' would not sound badly, eh, Boy ?"

".I '11 place it in the hand of my Solicitors;
I '11 have this thing put right.
We may make money,
But—isn't it funny !—
Few ' dignities ' Solicitors delight!''

[Left considering it.

FROM DARKEST AFRICA.

Mrs. Sheldon is back from her travels abroad.

Were she only a man, wre should hail her as manly !
As it is, there are some who, in wishing to laud,

Are accustomed to call her the feminine Stanley.
But now this adventurous, much-daring she

Through such perils has gone, and so gallantly held on,
In time that's to come Mr. Stanley may be

Merely known to us all as the male Mrs. Sheldon !

Motto for the Opponents of Capital Punishment.—No noose
is good news! (But what will grim Lord Grimthorpe say ?)

The Cheapest Insurance Office must be the Fee-nix.