DOI Heft:
April 2, 1892
DOI Seite / Zitierlink:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17693#0177
168
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
[April 2, 1892.
of Conspiracy in admirable speech. Later came Lockwood, speak- Irish Members vociferously cheered when Stanhope read the pas-
ing disrespectfully of " B." Then Soothe op Malwood, girding sage from Colonel's report. Another non-commissioned officer
at Solicitor-General ; Matthews followed, with plump assertion ! advancing from the rear, repeated order,
that Squire had not been talking about the Resolution Finally "I won't do't!" roared the implacable Private O'Grady.
Charles Russell, with demonstration that " the Right Hon. Gen- Once more the Irish Members burst into cheering, whilst a
tleman (meaning Matthews) had displayed a complete misconcep- soldier in uniform in Strangers' Gallery looked on and listened,
tion of the character and objects of the Resolution." Being thus Would like to hear his account of scene confided to comrades in
demonstrated upon unimpeachable authority that nobody knew
anything about the Resolution, House proceeded to vote upon it.
For, 180; against, 226. Ministerialists cheered; Opposition appa-
rently equally delighted. So home Ho bed, everyone determined
first thing in morning get hold of newspaper, and see what the
Resolution really was about. Business done.—Miscellaneous.
Wednesday.—"I wonder," said Sage of Queen Anne's Gate,
curiously regarding Chamberlain discoursing on the Eight Hours
Bill, '' whom Joe meant by his reference at Birmingham on Saturday
night to 'the funny man of the House of Commons,'—' A man who
has a natural taste for buffoonery, which he has cultivated with great
art, who has a hatred of every Government and all kinds of restraint,
privacy of barrack-room.
When Stanhope finished reading report of officer commanding
battalion, Irish Members leaped to their feet in body, each anxious
to stand shoulder to shoulder with Private 0'Grady defying the
Saxon. Nolan, who had set ball rolling, might have got in
first, but was so excited as to be momentarily speechless ; could only
paw at the air in direction of Treasury Bench where Stanhope sat,
Pat O'Brien, Arthur O'Connor, the wily Webb, and the flaccid
Flynn, all shouting together. But Sexton beat them all, and will
duly figure in Parliamentary Report as Vindicator of Nationality,
Defender of St. Patrick, and Patron of Private 0'Grady.
" There's nothing new about Ireland," said Poltalloch, talking
and especially, of course. ^et-n, , "the matter over later
of the Government that saLvatiow mat.rimowm. -_ fP^f^^Um^h m^. I in the Lobby. "'Tis
happens to be in office.' ! BUf "AU „ bAivvno/*' \'gS^W^0^W^iW^ the most distressful
Couldn't be Heneage, safetv matches • -- . <W&QJp$^\W^&£&.LMIm country that ever yet
and I don't suppose he masses wive= IJ^C^ was seen, Where they
s^^^^^ 'MSp^^ '' • ^ ^^^^^^^^^^^ ^ ^ ^ ^jj^^ p^ni^. p'^p.a^y
Joe is a man of cou- '^tZj^- anything a year it
rage. There are topics " ' Safety Matches ' for Life.—The following notice has been issued by the Salvation Army : pleased. Only say the
he might, with memory ' Safety matches are now made by the Social Wing without sulphur or phosphorus, which will flame word, and JoKIM would
of past speeches, easily without striking. What do we mean ? Just this. That if you are unmarried, and do not know have been bound to find
avoid or circumnavi- wnere to ch°ose a partner, you can communicate with Colonel Barker, Matrimonial Bureau, the money Members
gate. But he goes ^^^^^^"^'^'S'' and he wiU most Probably suPPJy 5r°u with Just what Jr°u want~ flocked down in large
straight at 'em,
w"te_ someooay loveaoie ana gooa.< numbers . Campbel£
ther fence or ditch, takes them at a stride regardless of his former
self, splashed with mud in the jump, or smitten with the horse's
hoof. Makes me quite sentimental when 1 sit and listen to him,
and recall days that are no more. Mrs. Gummidge thinking of the
Old 'Un is nothing to me thinking of the Young 'Un who came up
from Birmingham in 1876, and who from '80 to '85 walked hand in
hand with me.
We were patriots together.—Ah! placeman and peer
Are the patrons who smile on your labours to-day;
And Lords of the Treasury lustily cheer
Whatever you do and whatever you say.
Go, pocket, my Joseph, as much as you will,
The times are quite altered we very well know;
But will you not, will you not, talk to us still,
As you talked to us once long ago, long ago ?
We were patriots together !—I know you will think
Of the cobbler's caresses, the coalheaver's cries,
Of the stones that we throw, and the toasts that we drink
Of our pamphlets and pledges, our libels and lies !
When the truth shall awake, and the country and town
Be heartily weary of Balfour & Co.,
My Joseph, hark back to the Eadical frowD,
Let us be what we were, long ago, long ago !"
"Bless me," I cried, "how beautiful! I didn't know that,
among your many accomplishments, you were given to dropping
into poetry."
"Tut, tut! " said the Sage, blushing, "it isn't all my own; written
years ago by Mackworth Praed, about John Cam Hobhouse-
I 've only brought it up to date."
Busi?iess done.—Eight Hours' Bill thrown out on a Division.
Thursday.—Private 0'Grady, of the Welsh Fusiliers, the hero of
the hour. His annals short and simple. Got up early in the
morning of St. Patrick's Day ; provided himself with handful of
shamrock, which he stuck in his glengarry. {Note.—O'Grady, an
Irishman, belongs to a Welsh Regiment, and, to complete the pickle,
wears _ a Scotch cap.) The ignorant Saxon officer in command
observing the patriot muster with what he, all unconscious of St.
Patrick's Day, thought was "a handful of greens" in his cap,
instructed the non-commissioned officer to order him to take it out.
"I won't do't," said gallant Private O'Grady, the hot Celtic
blood swiftly brought to boiling pitch by this insult to St. Patrick.
Bannerman, seated on Front Opposition Bench, declares he could
distinctly hear smacking of lips of Hon. Members below Gangway
when Fenwick observed he thought £365 a year would be reasonable
allowance. However insidious temptation may have been, it was
nobly resisted. Of nearly 400 Members who took part in Division,
only 162 reached out their hand for the pittance, 227 lofty souls
going into other Lobby.
Business done.—Private Bill Procedure Bill brought in.
VERY ORCHID!
[" The more I think about it, the more I am oonvinced that the life of a
Peer is not a happy one."—Mr. Chamberlain, before the Jewellers' and
Silversmiths'' Association at Birmingham.']
The Orchid is a thoughtful plant—it loves the lordly hot-house,
And naturally reprobates poor gilliflowers as " pot-house ; "
'Tis rich, exotic, somewhat miscellaneously florid ;
The rough herbaceous annuals it vulgar deems, and horrid.
With all that's forced and precious it should fraternise in reason,
With luscious fruits and rarest roots, and produce out of season;
It may perhaps at primroses a condescending hand point; _ [point.
It might be friends with stocks—but from a pure commercial stand-
And yet—it is a thoughtful plant—though such a growth fastidious,
The proud but simple strawberry still seems to it invidious ;
Those ducal leaves that shine and twine around the nation's garden,
It fancies more delectable than all the blooms of Hawarden.
This orchid's bosom bleeds to feel that, while he flaunts in colour,
The chaplet of the strawberry should duller pine and duller, _
That obsoleteness, though delayed, should still be on the tapis,
That, pending its extinction, its existence isn't happy.
0 courtly leaves of strawberries, old England's grace and glory,
Emblazoned o'er the castle-keeps that moulder high and hoary,
What comfort for your drooping days, what balm in dire dejection,
That yonder orchid spruce extends his shelter and protection.
But, garland sere of Vere de Vere, wan ornaments of Fable,
The orchid is a thoughtful plant, and likes a gorgeous table ,
And, should from out your coronals one_ berry bright be shining,
His patronage may snap it up—to save it from declining!
NOTICE.—.Rejected Ooiuwuoicauons or Contributions, wUeiliur Ma., Printed Matter, Drawings, or 1'ictuxes oi any description, wiU
in no case be returned, not even when accompanied by a Stamped and Addressed Envelope, Cover, or Wrapper. To this rule
there will be no exception.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
[April 2, 1892.
of Conspiracy in admirable speech. Later came Lockwood, speak- Irish Members vociferously cheered when Stanhope read the pas-
ing disrespectfully of " B." Then Soothe op Malwood, girding sage from Colonel's report. Another non-commissioned officer
at Solicitor-General ; Matthews followed, with plump assertion ! advancing from the rear, repeated order,
that Squire had not been talking about the Resolution Finally "I won't do't!" roared the implacable Private O'Grady.
Charles Russell, with demonstration that " the Right Hon. Gen- Once more the Irish Members burst into cheering, whilst a
tleman (meaning Matthews) had displayed a complete misconcep- soldier in uniform in Strangers' Gallery looked on and listened,
tion of the character and objects of the Resolution." Being thus Would like to hear his account of scene confided to comrades in
demonstrated upon unimpeachable authority that nobody knew
anything about the Resolution, House proceeded to vote upon it.
For, 180; against, 226. Ministerialists cheered; Opposition appa-
rently equally delighted. So home Ho bed, everyone determined
first thing in morning get hold of newspaper, and see what the
Resolution really was about. Business done.—Miscellaneous.
Wednesday.—"I wonder," said Sage of Queen Anne's Gate,
curiously regarding Chamberlain discoursing on the Eight Hours
Bill, '' whom Joe meant by his reference at Birmingham on Saturday
night to 'the funny man of the House of Commons,'—' A man who
has a natural taste for buffoonery, which he has cultivated with great
art, who has a hatred of every Government and all kinds of restraint,
privacy of barrack-room.
When Stanhope finished reading report of officer commanding
battalion, Irish Members leaped to their feet in body, each anxious
to stand shoulder to shoulder with Private 0'Grady defying the
Saxon. Nolan, who had set ball rolling, might have got in
first, but was so excited as to be momentarily speechless ; could only
paw at the air in direction of Treasury Bench where Stanhope sat,
Pat O'Brien, Arthur O'Connor, the wily Webb, and the flaccid
Flynn, all shouting together. But Sexton beat them all, and will
duly figure in Parliamentary Report as Vindicator of Nationality,
Defender of St. Patrick, and Patron of Private 0'Grady.
" There's nothing new about Ireland," said Poltalloch, talking
and especially, of course. ^et-n, , "the matter over later
of the Government that saLvatiow mat.rimowm. -_ fP^f^^Um^h m^. I in the Lobby. "'Tis
happens to be in office.' ! BUf "AU „ bAivvno/*' \'gS^W^0^W^iW^ the most distressful
Couldn't be Heneage, safetv matches • -- . <W&QJp$^\W^&£&.LMIm country that ever yet
and I don't suppose he masses wive= IJ^C^ was seen, Where they
s^^^^^ 'MSp^^ '' • ^ ^^^^^^^^^^^ ^ ^ ^ ^jj^^ p^ni^. p'^p.a^y
Joe is a man of cou- '^tZj^- anything a year it
rage. There are topics " ' Safety Matches ' for Life.—The following notice has been issued by the Salvation Army : pleased. Only say the
he might, with memory ' Safety matches are now made by the Social Wing without sulphur or phosphorus, which will flame word, and JoKIM would
of past speeches, easily without striking. What do we mean ? Just this. That if you are unmarried, and do not know have been bound to find
avoid or circumnavi- wnere to ch°ose a partner, you can communicate with Colonel Barker, Matrimonial Bureau, the money Members
gate. But he goes ^^^^^^"^'^'S'' and he wiU most Probably suPPJy 5r°u with Just what Jr°u want~ flocked down in large
straight at 'em,
w"te_ someooay loveaoie ana gooa.< numbers . Campbel£
ther fence or ditch, takes them at a stride regardless of his former
self, splashed with mud in the jump, or smitten with the horse's
hoof. Makes me quite sentimental when 1 sit and listen to him,
and recall days that are no more. Mrs. Gummidge thinking of the
Old 'Un is nothing to me thinking of the Young 'Un who came up
from Birmingham in 1876, and who from '80 to '85 walked hand in
hand with me.
We were patriots together.—Ah! placeman and peer
Are the patrons who smile on your labours to-day;
And Lords of the Treasury lustily cheer
Whatever you do and whatever you say.
Go, pocket, my Joseph, as much as you will,
The times are quite altered we very well know;
But will you not, will you not, talk to us still,
As you talked to us once long ago, long ago ?
We were patriots together !—I know you will think
Of the cobbler's caresses, the coalheaver's cries,
Of the stones that we throw, and the toasts that we drink
Of our pamphlets and pledges, our libels and lies !
When the truth shall awake, and the country and town
Be heartily weary of Balfour & Co.,
My Joseph, hark back to the Eadical frowD,
Let us be what we were, long ago, long ago !"
"Bless me," I cried, "how beautiful! I didn't know that,
among your many accomplishments, you were given to dropping
into poetry."
"Tut, tut! " said the Sage, blushing, "it isn't all my own; written
years ago by Mackworth Praed, about John Cam Hobhouse-
I 've only brought it up to date."
Busi?iess done.—Eight Hours' Bill thrown out on a Division.
Thursday.—Private 0'Grady, of the Welsh Fusiliers, the hero of
the hour. His annals short and simple. Got up early in the
morning of St. Patrick's Day ; provided himself with handful of
shamrock, which he stuck in his glengarry. {Note.—O'Grady, an
Irishman, belongs to a Welsh Regiment, and, to complete the pickle,
wears _ a Scotch cap.) The ignorant Saxon officer in command
observing the patriot muster with what he, all unconscious of St.
Patrick's Day, thought was "a handful of greens" in his cap,
instructed the non-commissioned officer to order him to take it out.
"I won't do't," said gallant Private O'Grady, the hot Celtic
blood swiftly brought to boiling pitch by this insult to St. Patrick.
Bannerman, seated on Front Opposition Bench, declares he could
distinctly hear smacking of lips of Hon. Members below Gangway
when Fenwick observed he thought £365 a year would be reasonable
allowance. However insidious temptation may have been, it was
nobly resisted. Of nearly 400 Members who took part in Division,
only 162 reached out their hand for the pittance, 227 lofty souls
going into other Lobby.
Business done.—Private Bill Procedure Bill brought in.
VERY ORCHID!
[" The more I think about it, the more I am oonvinced that the life of a
Peer is not a happy one."—Mr. Chamberlain, before the Jewellers' and
Silversmiths'' Association at Birmingham.']
The Orchid is a thoughtful plant—it loves the lordly hot-house,
And naturally reprobates poor gilliflowers as " pot-house ; "
'Tis rich, exotic, somewhat miscellaneously florid ;
The rough herbaceous annuals it vulgar deems, and horrid.
With all that's forced and precious it should fraternise in reason,
With luscious fruits and rarest roots, and produce out of season;
It may perhaps at primroses a condescending hand point; _ [point.
It might be friends with stocks—but from a pure commercial stand-
And yet—it is a thoughtful plant—though such a growth fastidious,
The proud but simple strawberry still seems to it invidious ;
Those ducal leaves that shine and twine around the nation's garden,
It fancies more delectable than all the blooms of Hawarden.
This orchid's bosom bleeds to feel that, while he flaunts in colour,
The chaplet of the strawberry should duller pine and duller, _
That obsoleteness, though delayed, should still be on the tapis,
That, pending its extinction, its existence isn't happy.
0 courtly leaves of strawberries, old England's grace and glory,
Emblazoned o'er the castle-keeps that moulder high and hoary,
What comfort for your drooping days, what balm in dire dejection,
That yonder orchid spruce extends his shelter and protection.
But, garland sere of Vere de Vere, wan ornaments of Fable,
The orchid is a thoughtful plant, and likes a gorgeous table ,
And, should from out your coronals one_ berry bright be shining,
His patronage may snap it up—to save it from declining!
NOTICE.—.Rejected Ooiuwuoicauons or Contributions, wUeiliur Ma., Printed Matter, Drawings, or 1'ictuxes oi any description, wiU
in no case be returned, not even when accompanied by a Stamped and Addressed Envelope, Cover, or Wrapper. To this rule
there will be no exception.