Punch: Punch (56.1869)

1S8

PUNCH. OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[Mat S, I860.

MONDAY, APRIL 26th.

Ocr Artist goes to the Royal Academy on the appointed Day to hear if his Picture is Accepted. He barely escapes

with his Life and Hat !

ANOTHER “ STORY OE ELIZABETH.”

Hunger is the best of cooks, said one of old. He was not altogether
wise. The work of the best of cooks is lost on a ravenous man.
Bat gentle hunger, which we call appetite, is delightful. Natural, it
is best. It is good when gained by “ brown exercise.” It is not to
be despised when helped on by sherry-and-bitters. It is even welcome
when invited by bark. All agree that there is nothing so pleasant as a
reasonable hunger.

Yes. But there None thing highly expedient. That is, the having
wherewithal to satisfy this reasonable hunger. But why introduce
such a common-place ? We all—all who are worth thinking about—
have all we need; and as for the paupers, how many millions do we not
pay yearly for work-houses ? Nobody need be hungry in England
longer than he or she likes.

Exactly; and what a nuisance those newspapers are. They are
always disturbing our satisfaction with existing arrangements. Just
as we smooth ourselves down to a comfortable cigar and a glance at
the criticism on the last play, which (the criticism) is not so bad, we
come on a pestilent bit like this. A coroner has to view what is left of
Elizabeth Wilson, milliner, of Chelsea, aged 35. Having been far
gone in consumption she could not do much work, and a quarter’s
rent being just due, her landlord distrains, much sooner than usual,
being a wise landlord, who knows that consumption may be rapid.
However, she paid him £2 10s., but there was £5 owing. Broker left
in possession. She could have crawled from bed to do a little work,
but was not allowed to use her sewing-machine—might injure it, per-
haps, and so diminish its value to the landlord. Clergyman comes,
seeks a Relief agent, and a sovereign is paid, that she may use machine.
Agent comes again a day or two later, and landlord has swept all away,
and consumption lies on a bag of rags in a corner. Agent (a good man,
Mr. Dawes) sends her a bed and food. But Elizabeth Wilson
insists on dying.

These things will happen, and Punch would hardly have intruded
the story on polite readers, but that it bears upon his opening remarks.
Elizabeth told the clergyman—

“ That, being an out-patient of the Hospital for Consumption, she had plenty
J of physic, but that she dared not take it always, as it made her hungry, which
' she could not afford to be.”

Pray take notice, Mr. Punch is not blaming anybody. He never
blames anybody. Things go in averages, and there must be an average
of murder, fire, starvation, every year, to be duly tabulated, and argued
on at Social Science meetings—until dinner-time. Elizabeth Wilson,
unluckily for her, came into an average, and now is out of it, and at
rest. There must be an average of landlords, too, who look a little
sharply after their rights, and will be much comforted, we trust, to
think that they did so, in the hour when the doctor says they may have
“ whatever they like ”—words set to passing-bell music. All Mr.
Punch would point out is, that moderate hunger may, under certain
conditions, be undesirable. Whether any sort of private visiting
society, that could amuse the idleness from which the women of the
period sajr they suffer so much, might look up such cases as.these, is no
question for him—he piques himself on never being practical. He is
naif inclined to apologise for telling “the story of Elizabeth.”

To Sir Edwin.

120. The Swannery invaded by Sea-Eagles.—Academy Catalogue, 1869.

0 true Poet-Painter! the debt that you owe us
Prom Genius’s funds, you are constant to pay;

Your youth is renewed like the Eagle’s you show us—

Ear, very far off be the Swan’s parting lay.

Protection Wanted.

There is a Bill now passing through -Parliament entitled the
“ Sea-birds’ Preservation Bill.” This is a very commendable measure ;
but would it not be advisable also to protect another class of creatures
rather too much shot at just now ? Is not a Landlords’ Preservation
Bill desirable ?