Punch: Punch (101.1891)

2

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[July 4, 1891.

MR. PUNCH EXPLAINS.

[Last week Mr. Punch congratulated King Henry's " holy
shade" on the Four-hundredth Anniversary of the Foundation
of Eton College.]

To Mr. Punch's friends, who think he blundered,

In thinking Eton's years were just four hundred,

And acted quite in error when he paid

Congratulations to King Henry's " shade,"

A word of explanation now is due,

To show how what he stated then was true.

The word is this—that fifty years have now

Elapsed since Mr. Punch first made his bow ;

And though since then with many friends he's parted,

Himself he is as young as when he started.

Just fifty years ago it now appears

That fair Etona claimed four hundred years.

Ungallant it had been if one had told her

That Mr. Punch kept young whilst she grew older !

Yet if it is indeed the fourth Centenary

Or Jubilee the Ninth since holy 'Enery

Became the founder of a Royal College—

"Well, Mr. Punch prefers to have no knowledge.

He only does not know—has never known a

More worthy toast than " Floreat Etona ."'

The New Crusaders.

[" Kaiser Wilhelm, according to a Berlin Journal, has given his
consent to a lottery being instituted throughout the Empire ' for
combating the slave trade in Africa.' Tickets to the amount of
eight millions of marks will be issued, five and a half millions of
which will be devoted to prizes."—Daily Telegraph Berlin
Correspondent.]

Knights-errant of earth's earlier days,

Might learn from Wilhelm Kaiser.
They risked their lives in Paynim frays,

We moderns have grown wiser.
'Tis not enough by Big Bazaars

To buttress Churches tottery ;
We, with the dice "financing " wars,

Conduct Crusades - by Lottery !

"MANNING THE (BACK-)YARDS." ,LlIE J^™-~Mr- Parkinson wiU now probably

admit that the foolish process known as breaking a
Ch elsea, June, 1891. Four Bell(e)s. butterfly on a wheel" may bring the breaker woe.

SHAKSPEAEE AND NOETH, NOT CHEISTOPHEE.

Colonel North is popularly supposed to have been the architect
of his own fortune, but he doesn't seem to have profited much by
his architectural knowledge when applied to house-building. The
burly Colonel—we forget at this moment what regiment is under his
distinguished
command —
has met many
a great per-
sonage in his
time, but, like
the eminent
barbarian
who encoun-
tered a Chris-
tian Arch-
bishop for the
first time—St.
Ambrose, we
rather think
it was, but no
matter — our
bold Colonel
had to climb

down a bit on | jss^ jS^OUd' *~ /I \U'~ ' " They also serve who only stand and wait."—Milton.

coming face

"woman," read "architect." Curious that the name of Gamble
should be the pre-surname of Mister Colonel North's brother.
What's in a name ? Yet there 's a good deal in the sound and look
of Cajole North, especially when up before the Lord Chief, who
must quite recently have got hold of quite a little library of useful
knowledge. Also odd that most of Mr. North's money seems to have
been made in the South. But "A 1," that is, the architect, won,
and the gallant Mister Colonel, or Colonel Mister, left the Court,
feeling comparatively A-Norther man. Never mind, even the
Millionairey Colonel can't always be lucky.

MR. PUNCH'S QUOTATION BOOK.

I.—For Inferior Champagne^
' How mad and bad and sad it was—
But then, how it was sweet! "—Browning.

LT.—For Mr. Gladstone.

" Et longa eanoros
Dant per colla modos."—Virgil.

III.—For the New Bishop of Lichfield.
" Gaiter.—A covering for the leg."—English Dictionary.

IV.—For a Tennis-player, Imprisoned by Bad Weather.

to face, with
the Lord
Chief Justice
of England C-l-n-1 H -rth as Falstaff.

YYTI-iif n n!,oi L-rd C-l-r-dgc as the Lord Chief Justice.

f aal a cast Henry the Fourth, Part'll., Act ii., Sc.

tor a scene *

out of Henry the Fourth .' Fahtaff, Colonel North, and My
LotI Coleridge for the Lord Chief Justice. The scene might
be Part II., Act ii., Scene 1, when the Lord Chief says to Sir John,
"You speak as having power to do wrong; but answer, in the
effect of your reputation, and satisfy the poor woman,"—only for

At St. James's Hall.—Hair Paddy R.ewski is a pianofortist up
to the time and tune of day. Knowing that FEnfant Prvdigue
is now all the go, he keeps himself up to date by performing the
Musical Prodigy Son's, I mean Mendelssohn's " Songs without
Words , " and this so effectively, that the last wordless song he was
obliged to repeat, and much obliged the audience by repeating.
Then the good fellar played La Campanella, Which I prefer to
Gentle Zitclla The Princess Louise, &c, were there, and "&&"
was really looking uncommonly well considering the heat. Bravo,
Paddy Rewski ! "Ould Ireland for evei !