Punch (37.1859)

122

[[September 17, 1859.

i

I



PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

THE SEASON

Mr. Robinson takes a seat at the
Roulette Table.

AT 3ADEN.

Mr. Robinson in the course oe
an Hour.

BRIGHAM YOUNG, PAPA.

According to a conversation which Horace
Greeley, of the New York Tribune, had with the
High Priest or Arclihumbug of the Mormons,
Pio Nono has a formidable Antipope in Brigham
Young. . Brigiiam pretends that his Church is
not only infallible, but is moreover instructed by
direct revelation, through himself of course, so
that he is not obliged to wait till an opinion has
gained ground and become general among the
Mormonites before he ventures to publish it as
a new dogma. Brigham is a cock that crows on
his own peculiar elevation to precisely the same
tune as that of his rival on the Seven Hills.
Witness the following portion of his dialogue
with H. G.

“ H. G. : Then I am to understand that you regard
other Churches professing to be Christian as the Church
of Rome regards all Churches not in communion with
itself—as schismatic, heretical, and out of the way of
salvation ? —B. Y. : Yres, substantially.”

Pius says Brigham is not in the way of sal-
vation, anil Brigham says that Pius is out of it.
What is this more than “ Cockadoodledoo! ” on
the one side and on the other ? Only the Yankee
cock crows higher than the Italian one. The
Pope of Utah, moreover, has much more reason
in some of his apostolical versions and renderings
than the Pope of Rome. Por example:—

“ H. G. : Does not the Apostle Paul say that a Bishop
should be ‘ the husband of one wife ? ’—B. Y. : So we
hold. We do not regard any but a married man as fitted
for the office of Bishop. But the Apostle does not forbid
a Bishop having more wives than one.”

A Bishop, says the text, as enlarged by Pope
Brigham, should be the husband of one wife at
least. As retrenched by the other Pope, it is
consistent with a canon which makes one wrife
for a Bishop one too many. Is not the Antipope’s
addition to the plain words of the precept a little
more reasonable than the Pope’s subtraction
from them ?

THE DISTURBANCES IN THE
EASTERN CHURCH.

We are sorry to find that the Eastern Church,
namely, St. George’s in the East, has become
infected with the same follies and superstitions
as those which have hitherto been limited to the
"Western Churches, particularly St. Barnabas’s
and St. Paul’s. Clergymen officiate in the
Eastern Church attired in the very height of
Puseyite fashion, wearing vestments of gay and
gaudy colours ; green for example, and, for aught
we know, mauve. They also give themselves the
same ridiculous airs and graces as their brethren,
we might almost say their sisters, in the Churches
of the West. As in the West so in the East,
these innovations have excited great tumults
among the laity, attended with manifestations of
an iconoclastic spirit, which reverend gents who
think fit to make images, figures, or Guys of
themselves had better beware of.

Mr. Robinson having lost the whole of iiis Money “1 la Roulette,” Works

out his Hotel Bill.

VOTER-BOTTLING STOPPERED.

Our male readers of course know what it is to “bottle” voters. But ladies equally of
course can have no knowledge of the process, and should female curiosity impel them to desire
it, they may easily inform themselves by reading the Assize reports, which have faate de
news been overrunning all the papers. They will learn there that the course which is pursued
in bottling voters, like as the course of true love, but rarely runneth smoothly. They will
read that in one recent case “much violence was resorted to,” and that in another “the
voter was much bruised.” And reading this, their feelings will incline them to agree with
us that it is high time at this present that such bottling should be stopped.

We are not Teetotallers, and would never stop a bottle where legitimately pushed. But
to bottle up a voter is to push him to extremities, and as this is an infringement of the free-
dom of the subject, while this is a free country we cannot but complain of it. There is
too much body in such bottling to please us, and they who make a trade of it deserve to
get their knuckles rapped. Although no friends to bribery, we like it better than coercion.
We don’t so much object to treating voters to a bottle, but to bottle them up bodily amounts
to false imprisonment, which there ought to be most stringent and deterring laws to stop.
The lightest punishment awarded for bottling a voter ought to be, to send the bottler for a
twelvemonth to the Jug.

The Italian Snowball.

Roll the Snowball, roll;

’Twill gather strength in going.

The Tyrants of the Soul
And Body overthrowing
In each Italian state :

’Twill gain and gain in weight,

Till grown an Avalanche; to topple down.
And crush the Triple Crown,

“ The Inexhaustible Bottle.”—The one of
which Lord Palmerston is the Bottle holder.

Dr. Pettigrew’s Motto.—“ Crescit amoi
Mummy.”