DOI Heft:
August 1, 1863
DOI Seite / Zitierlink: https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16872#0053
August 1, 1863.]
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
41
PUNCH’S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
July 20th. .1/onday. We shall change the name of Canada into
Canidia, and treat her as an objectionable old woman ought to be
treated if she does not behave herself better than she is represented by
Government as doing. Where’s your Militia, Mrs. Canada? Are
we to do everything for you? Come, take good counsel, and help
vourself. Then, as Alcides remarked to the Carter:—
“ Then, should the task too mighty prove.
We may assist you with a shove,
But those who indolent remain,
May roar for aid, but roar in vain.”
You know how Salmon spring up and leap against falling water.
Well, the Irish salmon have leapt right up into the House of Lords.
There was great splashing to-night.
The Lords have passed the Bill for getting rid of London Tolls after
July next. This is a great thing. But we hold naught done while
aught remains to do. Now, boys, we must take the Bridges. We are
not, freemen while tribute is exacted there. Let us fight the Battle of
Waterloo over again at its bridge, smash Southwark, and lay Lambeth
low.
Sir John Shelley tried to defeat the Bill which gives Gog and
Magog power to deal with the Yan Demons and other fiends of traffic.
But he was desired by Sir George Grey to desist, as the measure
was a vpry useful one. We burn to see the giants rush at their work.
The Great Lat.e Eastern Railway is to be allowed to have steamboats
in connection with its lines. Our naval correspondent informs us that
several are on the stocks, among them the Dawdle, th> Laggard, the
Baron Troptard, the Athelstan Unready, the Fabius, and the Chancery,
and that the first of them will very likely be in a forward state for
launching about Christmas, 1870.
The Polish debate then took place, Lord Palmerston clearing the
way for it. Mr. Horsman delivered an eloquent harangue, denouncing
the treaty of Yienna, and advocating the re-construction of the King-
dom of Poland. He prophesied that war would be necessary to effect
that object. Mr, Gladstone bad the disagreeable duty of throwing
cold water upon the House, by way of obviating any inflammatory
action. He showed the impossibility of getting the Sovereigns to sur-
render their possessions, and argued t hat in some respects the change
would be undesirable. He thorn-Ip we had done our duty in inter-
fering with our argument and pn/«si,. Mr. Hennessy adverted to
the Russian admission that legality would be death to the rule of
Russia in Poland, and he desired that legality, as it would be life and
liberty to Poland. Mr. Kin glare did not think the restoration
scheme feasible, and praised Austria. After some other speeches, Lord
Palmerston defended the course of the Government, dwelt on the
influence which Public Opinion had upon monarchs, reserved anuounce-
ment, of the course which we should take consequent on the Russian
answer, but intimated that the first thing to be brought about was the
stoppage of the slaughter. The Trench press considers the English
debate contemptible, and worthy of a selfish nation that will talk as
much as you please, but will act only when its own material interests
are at stake.
Tuesday. The Lords had another innings at the eternal Eish Bill-
This must certainly be known as the Eishy Session. We are getting
some glimmering of an idea as to the nature of the measure, which
seems intended to assimilate the fish law of Ireland with that of England
and Scotland, and to prevent salmon-murder. We imagine that the
Bill must be just, because it is so furiously opposed. It has passed.
The Commons talked about Japan, and Mr. Layard encouraged us
with hopes that we shall hang the Japanese aristocracy generally, a
slight remedial process which is all that is necessary to ou. getting on
very well with the Tycoon and his lieges, and which therefore had
better be effected at once, in the interest of trade. The very hard
case of Mr. Bewicke came up. He fired a pistol out of window,
and some scoundrel sheriff’s officers perjured him into prison, and
j while he was there Greenwich Hospital seized and sold all his goods.
Bis innocence established, he is released and ruined, but the Editor
of the Booh of Praise thinks that it would be establishing a bad pre-
cedent to compensate him, and that a certain average of injustice must
be borne by British subjects.
Our friend Mr. Darby Griffith, of whom not much hath been lately
heard, popped up again, and made some observations which a Minister
said were not unreasonable. We forget what they were about, nor does
it much matter.
Wednesday was chiefly remarkable for the vain attempts of Sir
Roundell Palmer and Sir George Grey to break the laws of the
House. They each tried to bolt before a Plouse could be made. The
Solicitor nearly got out, but was captured and sent back to bis place,
but the Secretary was instantly arrested by the Sergeant-at-Arms.
The same day Judge Bramwell declared in open court, that if Lord
Palmerston were put before him “he would try him like any other
man.” It is truly gratifying to behold how equal are all Englishmen
before the law. The Ereneh say they are, but the Erencli sometimeo
make little mistakes, which are corrected before the tribunals. The
Boiling Down ol Statutes Bill went through committee, and was
looks lily hindered by certain Parliamentary sciolists. Be it mentioned
that this measure repeals, inter alia, several clauses in Bftagna ffifjarta.
V\ hat will Lord Russell say? To be sure the clauses have already
najVTul> rpPealt'tl.*’or a couple of hundred years. A measure
called the Rum Duty Bill was read a second time, and we must really
protest against so very familiar, not to say vulgar a way of describing
an impost. At the same time we are free to admit that some of our
duties as well as some of our pleasures are exceedingly rum.
Thursday. The Foresters of Birmingham, copying the example of the
Aristocrats of Sydenham, assembled in a great crowd, on the previous
Monday, to see a woman, named Powell, perform some dangerous
feats akin to those performed by a man named Blondin. The scene
was Aston Park, a place inaugurated by the Queen and Prince Albert.
and devoted (as was supposed in this case and in that of the Crysta.
Palace), to rational recreation. M. Blondin has not yet been killed,
but Mrs. Powell’s rope broke, and she died. She would have been a
mother in three months. How the Aristocrats would act under similar
circumstances remains to be seen. The Eoresters continued their
revels, danced, and finished with fireworks. The subject was brought
before Parliament by Lord Malmesbury and Mr. Doulton, and the
answer of Government is, that no doubt such things are very deplorable,
but as the public likes such exhibitions “it is difficult” to interfere, but
the Press (to which it is sometimes very convenient for great folks to
appeal, and which at other times it is equally convenient to repudiate),
is requested to express itself strongly ou the matter. We conceive that
we do so by simply stating the facts, and adding that the plea of the
Government is a most unworthy one. If the very highest idea of a
Government is, as Sydney Smith says, a Stout Constable, even that
officer should prevent demoralising exhibitions. Sir George Grey
himself could interfere when M. Blondin proposed to carry a child—
not unborn—along the Sydenham rope. Parliament would give him
a prohibition Bill in three days, if be is afraid to act without one.
Lord Palmerston, in reply to Mr. Seymour Fitzgerald, entered
into the Sleswig Holstein affair, and said that Denmark would be sup-
ported against any improper action by other powers, meaning Prussia
and Austria. “They would not have to contend with Denmark
alone.”
Mr. Cobden renewed his protest against the supply of ships to the
Confederates, and Lord Palmerston replied that the case was not one
of a belligerent and a rebel, but of two belligerents, and that according
to the doctrine of the Americans themselves, a neutral may supply a
belligerent.
Sir Charles Wood and his India budget. India is Paying.
Friday. Lord Shaftesbury concluded his Parliamentary work for
the year with a speech worthy of himself. He called attention to the
injuries and cruellies inflicted upon Children engaged in certain manu-
factures and occupations, and he showed that thousands of white
children are in all save the name, ill-treated Slaves. We recommend
the details of his speech, painful as they are, to the attention of sub-
scribers to missionary societies, and spouters against American slavery.
An animated debate on Poland. Lord Russell modified the decla-
ration that England would not go to war with Russia. Lord Strat-
ford condemned the “brutal” feeling of Russia towards the Poles
Lord Malmesbury thought that we ought not to have remonstrated,
but ought to have withdrawn our Ambassador. Lord Ellenborough
thought we ought to enforce our demand.
The Commons held their last Conversazione, and multilarious were
the topics. The Solicitor-General gave Mr. Pope Hennessy a most
severe snubbing for his opposition to the Statutes Revision Bill, and
called him a smatterer who had crammed himself with notions from an
old edition of Blackstone, a little Hymn of Praise like that, sung by
the converted pugilist over the body of Colonel Quagg. University
Tests came up, Mr. Henley was very amusing, and the Finance
Minister, who is also the Minister of Religion, insisted that “ a definite
faith must have a set of tests,” though he thought the present ones
might be amended. Mr. Milnes complained of the Abbey charges for
admitting Monuments. Mr. Cox dwelt upon the frightful increase of
Infanticide; Mr Hunt expatiated upon the immorality of crinoline;
and Mr. Kinglake urged that we should help Poland. Lord
Palmerston answered these and other speakers, spoke hopefully of
Greece, promised a scheme for utilising the Exhibition Land, and
pledged himself to act in concert with Erance and Austria as to Poland.
So ended the last Friday of the Session, for on
Saturday, at the Trafalgar, Mrs. Hart expected every man in the
Cabinet to do his duty by her Whitebait, and was not disappointed.
Last from St. M«rtin’s-le-&rand.
If a Post Office Clerk plays truant and goes to the Alexandra Park,
why can’t Sir Rowland blow him up? Because the young fellow
takes the way to Muzzle Hill.
Vol. 45.
2—2
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
41
PUNCH’S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.
July 20th. .1/onday. We shall change the name of Canada into
Canidia, and treat her as an objectionable old woman ought to be
treated if she does not behave herself better than she is represented by
Government as doing. Where’s your Militia, Mrs. Canada? Are
we to do everything for you? Come, take good counsel, and help
vourself. Then, as Alcides remarked to the Carter:—
“ Then, should the task too mighty prove.
We may assist you with a shove,
But those who indolent remain,
May roar for aid, but roar in vain.”
You know how Salmon spring up and leap against falling water.
Well, the Irish salmon have leapt right up into the House of Lords.
There was great splashing to-night.
The Lords have passed the Bill for getting rid of London Tolls after
July next. This is a great thing. But we hold naught done while
aught remains to do. Now, boys, we must take the Bridges. We are
not, freemen while tribute is exacted there. Let us fight the Battle of
Waterloo over again at its bridge, smash Southwark, and lay Lambeth
low.
Sir John Shelley tried to defeat the Bill which gives Gog and
Magog power to deal with the Yan Demons and other fiends of traffic.
But he was desired by Sir George Grey to desist, as the measure
was a vpry useful one. We burn to see the giants rush at their work.
The Great Lat.e Eastern Railway is to be allowed to have steamboats
in connection with its lines. Our naval correspondent informs us that
several are on the stocks, among them the Dawdle, th> Laggard, the
Baron Troptard, the Athelstan Unready, the Fabius, and the Chancery,
and that the first of them will very likely be in a forward state for
launching about Christmas, 1870.
The Polish debate then took place, Lord Palmerston clearing the
way for it. Mr. Horsman delivered an eloquent harangue, denouncing
the treaty of Yienna, and advocating the re-construction of the King-
dom of Poland. He prophesied that war would be necessary to effect
that object. Mr, Gladstone bad the disagreeable duty of throwing
cold water upon the House, by way of obviating any inflammatory
action. He showed the impossibility of getting the Sovereigns to sur-
render their possessions, and argued t hat in some respects the change
would be undesirable. He thorn-Ip we had done our duty in inter-
fering with our argument and pn/«si,. Mr. Hennessy adverted to
the Russian admission that legality would be death to the rule of
Russia in Poland, and he desired that legality, as it would be life and
liberty to Poland. Mr. Kin glare did not think the restoration
scheme feasible, and praised Austria. After some other speeches, Lord
Palmerston defended the course of the Government, dwelt on the
influence which Public Opinion had upon monarchs, reserved anuounce-
ment, of the course which we should take consequent on the Russian
answer, but intimated that the first thing to be brought about was the
stoppage of the slaughter. The Trench press considers the English
debate contemptible, and worthy of a selfish nation that will talk as
much as you please, but will act only when its own material interests
are at stake.
Tuesday. The Lords had another innings at the eternal Eish Bill-
This must certainly be known as the Eishy Session. We are getting
some glimmering of an idea as to the nature of the measure, which
seems intended to assimilate the fish law of Ireland with that of England
and Scotland, and to prevent salmon-murder. We imagine that the
Bill must be just, because it is so furiously opposed. It has passed.
The Commons talked about Japan, and Mr. Layard encouraged us
with hopes that we shall hang the Japanese aristocracy generally, a
slight remedial process which is all that is necessary to ou. getting on
very well with the Tycoon and his lieges, and which therefore had
better be effected at once, in the interest of trade. The very hard
case of Mr. Bewicke came up. He fired a pistol out of window,
and some scoundrel sheriff’s officers perjured him into prison, and
j while he was there Greenwich Hospital seized and sold all his goods.
Bis innocence established, he is released and ruined, but the Editor
of the Booh of Praise thinks that it would be establishing a bad pre-
cedent to compensate him, and that a certain average of injustice must
be borne by British subjects.
Our friend Mr. Darby Griffith, of whom not much hath been lately
heard, popped up again, and made some observations which a Minister
said were not unreasonable. We forget what they were about, nor does
it much matter.
Wednesday was chiefly remarkable for the vain attempts of Sir
Roundell Palmer and Sir George Grey to break the laws of the
House. They each tried to bolt before a Plouse could be made. The
Solicitor nearly got out, but was captured and sent back to bis place,
but the Secretary was instantly arrested by the Sergeant-at-Arms.
The same day Judge Bramwell declared in open court, that if Lord
Palmerston were put before him “he would try him like any other
man.” It is truly gratifying to behold how equal are all Englishmen
before the law. The Ereneh say they are, but the Erencli sometimeo
make little mistakes, which are corrected before the tribunals. The
Boiling Down ol Statutes Bill went through committee, and was
looks lily hindered by certain Parliamentary sciolists. Be it mentioned
that this measure repeals, inter alia, several clauses in Bftagna ffifjarta.
V\ hat will Lord Russell say? To be sure the clauses have already
najVTul> rpPealt'tl.*’or a couple of hundred years. A measure
called the Rum Duty Bill was read a second time, and we must really
protest against so very familiar, not to say vulgar a way of describing
an impost. At the same time we are free to admit that some of our
duties as well as some of our pleasures are exceedingly rum.
Thursday. The Foresters of Birmingham, copying the example of the
Aristocrats of Sydenham, assembled in a great crowd, on the previous
Monday, to see a woman, named Powell, perform some dangerous
feats akin to those performed by a man named Blondin. The scene
was Aston Park, a place inaugurated by the Queen and Prince Albert.
and devoted (as was supposed in this case and in that of the Crysta.
Palace), to rational recreation. M. Blondin has not yet been killed,
but Mrs. Powell’s rope broke, and she died. She would have been a
mother in three months. How the Aristocrats would act under similar
circumstances remains to be seen. The Eoresters continued their
revels, danced, and finished with fireworks. The subject was brought
before Parliament by Lord Malmesbury and Mr. Doulton, and the
answer of Government is, that no doubt such things are very deplorable,
but as the public likes such exhibitions “it is difficult” to interfere, but
the Press (to which it is sometimes very convenient for great folks to
appeal, and which at other times it is equally convenient to repudiate),
is requested to express itself strongly ou the matter. We conceive that
we do so by simply stating the facts, and adding that the plea of the
Government is a most unworthy one. If the very highest idea of a
Government is, as Sydney Smith says, a Stout Constable, even that
officer should prevent demoralising exhibitions. Sir George Grey
himself could interfere when M. Blondin proposed to carry a child—
not unborn—along the Sydenham rope. Parliament would give him
a prohibition Bill in three days, if be is afraid to act without one.
Lord Palmerston, in reply to Mr. Seymour Fitzgerald, entered
into the Sleswig Holstein affair, and said that Denmark would be sup-
ported against any improper action by other powers, meaning Prussia
and Austria. “They would not have to contend with Denmark
alone.”
Mr. Cobden renewed his protest against the supply of ships to the
Confederates, and Lord Palmerston replied that the case was not one
of a belligerent and a rebel, but of two belligerents, and that according
to the doctrine of the Americans themselves, a neutral may supply a
belligerent.
Sir Charles Wood and his India budget. India is Paying.
Friday. Lord Shaftesbury concluded his Parliamentary work for
the year with a speech worthy of himself. He called attention to the
injuries and cruellies inflicted upon Children engaged in certain manu-
factures and occupations, and he showed that thousands of white
children are in all save the name, ill-treated Slaves. We recommend
the details of his speech, painful as they are, to the attention of sub-
scribers to missionary societies, and spouters against American slavery.
An animated debate on Poland. Lord Russell modified the decla-
ration that England would not go to war with Russia. Lord Strat-
ford condemned the “brutal” feeling of Russia towards the Poles
Lord Malmesbury thought that we ought not to have remonstrated,
but ought to have withdrawn our Ambassador. Lord Ellenborough
thought we ought to enforce our demand.
The Commons held their last Conversazione, and multilarious were
the topics. The Solicitor-General gave Mr. Pope Hennessy a most
severe snubbing for his opposition to the Statutes Revision Bill, and
called him a smatterer who had crammed himself with notions from an
old edition of Blackstone, a little Hymn of Praise like that, sung by
the converted pugilist over the body of Colonel Quagg. University
Tests came up, Mr. Henley was very amusing, and the Finance
Minister, who is also the Minister of Religion, insisted that “ a definite
faith must have a set of tests,” though he thought the present ones
might be amended. Mr. Milnes complained of the Abbey charges for
admitting Monuments. Mr. Cox dwelt upon the frightful increase of
Infanticide; Mr Hunt expatiated upon the immorality of crinoline;
and Mr. Kinglake urged that we should help Poland. Lord
Palmerston answered these and other speakers, spoke hopefully of
Greece, promised a scheme for utilising the Exhibition Land, and
pledged himself to act in concert with Erance and Austria as to Poland.
So ended the last Friday of the Session, for on
Saturday, at the Trafalgar, Mrs. Hart expected every man in the
Cabinet to do his duty by her Whitebait, and was not disappointed.
Last from St. M«rtin’s-le-&rand.
If a Post Office Clerk plays truant and goes to the Alexandra Park,
why can’t Sir Rowland blow him up? Because the young fellow
takes the way to Muzzle Hill.
Vol. 45.
2—2