Punch (47.1864)

July 30, 1864.]

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

41

A FACT-NOTICE WITH A VENGEANCE.

Fond, but Stout Parent “ Ye?, she dofs take Notice, so ; and she ’s beginning
TO KNOW ALL THE BEASTS IN THE ARK BY NAME, TOO. THERE, BaBY, WHAT’S
this ?” (Holding up Hippopotamus.)

Baby (unhesitatingly). “ Mam-ma.”

we may ask what product of domestic cookery is resembled
by an airy commercial speculation which comes to grief?
Not a hash ; no : do you give it up ? Bubble and Squeak.

THE COMING COMET.

Air—“ There's a Good Time Coming, Boys."

There ’s a Comet coming, Boys,

A Comet coming;

We ourselves can’t name the day,
Nor can Mister Hind yet say,
When the Comet’s coming.

Our last Comet came out strong,

This will come out stronger;
Comets’ tails are very long,

This one’s will be longer.

Chorus. There’s a Comet coming, Boys,
A Comet coming;

There’s a Comet coming, Boys,
Wait a little longer.

There’s a Comet coming, Boys,

A Comet coming;

When the Emperor shall be
Thinking hut of Eugenie,

As the Comet’s coming.
Workhouses shall ope their doors.
None shall die of bonger,
Organmen shall quit our shores.

Wait, a little longer.

Chorus. There’s a Comet coming, Boys,
A Comet coming ;

There’s a Comet coming Boys,
Wait a little longer.

There’s a Comet coming, Boys,

A Comet coming;

When poor needlewomen may
For fair work receive fair pay,

As the Comet’s coming :

Brutes who beat their wives shall be
Scourged with a sharp thong, a
Cabman shall act civile,

Wait a little longer.

Chorus. There’s a Comet coming, Boys,
A Comet coming;

There’s a Comet coming, Boys,
W ait a little longer.

LOFTY SPECULATIONS.

People who have more money than they know what to do with should dispose
of it in the purchase of shares in some of those highly promising joint-stock
companies, so many of which we now see advertised in the newspapers and in
circulars sent to us through the Post-Office or left by errand boys at the door.
If a man is estimated by the company he keeps, he will of course improve his
social position by joining a company, in which his fellow-members will, many of
them, be noblemen. It is now getting to be quite a common proceeding amongst
the aristocracy to become directors of associations formed for the purpose of
keeping taverns and shops, or, as their advertisements say, of “ acquiring the
business of Messrs. So and So,” guaranteed to return at least ten per cent.
Various prospectuses of these dignified concerns are before the world—or behind
the fire. In addition to the schemes already proposed by noble lords and gentlemen
to small capitalists who regard interest rather than security, we may announce
the following:—

The Queen’s Counsel Company (Limited).—The formation of this Company
has been effected with a view to acquire the practice of the Queen’s Counsel. Its
efforts will likewise be directed to buying up that of the learned Serjeants, and
t he other leading barristers.

The Medical Attendance Company (Limited).—The object of this Association
is that of acquiring the practice of the principal Physicians and Surgeons of London,
and _ supplying medicine and advice and surgical aid of a superior quality to the
British public.

Snip and Co. (Limited).—This Company has been formed, as its name implies,
for the purpose of acquiring the business of Messrs. Snip, Goosey and Co., the
celebrated tailors.

The United Applewoman, Tater-Can and Oyster Stall Company (Limited),—
has been formed for the acquisition of the whole of the business at present
carried on by the old women, costermongers, and others who keep the various
fruit, and fish-stalls oi this great Metropolis. Capital £1,000.000, in 10,000 shares of
£100 each, of which it is not intended to call up more than M. a share.

Having submitted the foregoing list of eligible investments to confiding minds,

There’s a Comet coming, Boys,

A Comet coming.

To the war an end there ’ll be,

When Americans shall see
The Comet coming.

Warlike keels shall not at sea,

Rouse the slumb’ring conger,
Universal peace there ’ll be,

Wait a little longer.

Chorus. There’s a Comet coming, Boys,
A Comet coming,

North and South Amerikee,
Wait a little longer.

There’s a Comet coming, Boys,

A Comet coming;

’Tis to strike Earth’s upper crust,
Gracious ! won’t there be a dust!

If this Comet’s coming !

Hind, perhaps quite wrong may be,
Talmage may be wronger,

In Bishop’s ob-ser-va-t.o-ree.

Wait a little longer !

Chorus. If a Comet’s coming, Boys,

A Comet’s coming!

May you, with me,

Be there to see.

But—wait a little longer.

The Yankee “Devil’s Own.”

Several of the Commanders of the Federal Army are
said to have been lawyers. The American Civil War
appears to be the first, in which troops have been led to
action by Attorney-Generals.

Vol. 47.