DOI issue:
August 26, 1865
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16876#0088
76
PUNCH. OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
[August 26, 1865.
ANOTHER BRILLIANT IDEA, ONLY BRILLIANTER!
{Vide “ Punch” August 5th.)
CURIOUS QUESTION IN RAILWAY LAW.
Dear Sir,
We all know the law of the Railway Carriage Window, and that it is under the undis-
puted control of the person who sits in the corner with his face to the wind.
But, Sir, the Great Western Carriages, as you may know, are divided in the middle by a door,
wflich separates the two compartments.
Mrs. Grundy and I were on this line the other day, and I had reason to believe that the lady
in question had some remarks to make to me of a somewhat incisive character. I may or may
not have deserved them. I admit that it was three o’clock in the morning when I got home,
at least I think so; but on the other hand I don’t often do it, I had met friends, my watch had
stopped, the cold punch was good, and the night was very hot. However, I was clearly
going to catch it, tor Mrs. Grundy desired me to close the door in the middle of the carriage,
and then she herself pulled up its window in rather—I must say—a menacing manner. I do
not usually read on railways, all doctors say that nothing is more ruinous to the eyesight,
but on this occasion I plunged, head over ears, into the Cherbourg fetes.
Before Mrs. Grundy’s warning cough was
over (she caught it, of course, not waiting
in the wind for the cab after Alfred Mellon’s
Concert, but sitting up in a comfortable room
for me) a gentleman in the other compartment
put the window down again.
I was obliged, at Mbs. Grundy’s instance,
to commence a row, in the course of which
1 called him names, but I hereby privately
signify to him that I was very much obliged
to him, as the wrangle prevented the lecture,
and took all the steam out of Mrs. Grundy.
But, Sir, as one may have pleasant things
to say to a lady, as well as unpleasant ones to
hear from one’s wife, in a carriage, please
inform me what is the law of the Middle Win-
dow on the Great Western, and oblige
Yours very faithfully,
Democritus Grundy.
Pemhridge Terrace.
THE
SALUTATION AT CHERBOURG.
Air—“ The Death of Nelson."
Recitative.
O’er good Bordeaux, at moderate cost pos-
sessed,
Britannia cracks her filberts with a zest;
May those light wines be hers no end of years,
And in exchange Erance take our ales and
beers!
Air.
’Twas we, in Cherbourg gay.
That with the Erenchmen lay,
Each heart was jolly then.
Amid the fire and smoke.
Our ships were iron and oak,
And ditto were our men.
Our Dacres marked them on the wave ;
Three cheers their friends our seamen gave,
Nor thought of war and booty.
The Captains had an extra can
Of grog served out to every man,
And hollaing was a duty.
The harmless cannons roar
Along the crowded shore—
Our Dacres led the way:
His ship the Edgar named,
Long be that Edgar famed!
No man got drunk that day;
We drank no more than what we ought.
Our brave allies’ good-will we sought,
And not their lives and booty.
From mouth to mouth the saying ran,
“ This is the way for every man
To have to do his duty.”
No death, nor any wound.
From guns that did but sound,
A single breast received ;
No harm on either side.
“ Hip, hip, hooray ! ” we cried,
M To see what fun we ’ve lived !
Hate between French and English past.
And French and English friends at last;
Free trade for war and booty.”
So Gladstone ends what Peel began,
And England will confess that man
Has rather done his duty.
A Slight Confusion.
A Paragraph in a contemporary, relating
the bold attempt of a nurse to collar a burglar,
is headed, “ Burglary and Courageous Conduct
of a Woman.” Is not this rather putting
the cart before the mare, to the mare’s wrong ?
The woman distinguished herself by coura-
geous conduct, but did not commit Burglary.
F
PUNCH. OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
[August 26, 1865.
ANOTHER BRILLIANT IDEA, ONLY BRILLIANTER!
{Vide “ Punch” August 5th.)
CURIOUS QUESTION IN RAILWAY LAW.
Dear Sir,
We all know the law of the Railway Carriage Window, and that it is under the undis-
puted control of the person who sits in the corner with his face to the wind.
But, Sir, the Great Western Carriages, as you may know, are divided in the middle by a door,
wflich separates the two compartments.
Mrs. Grundy and I were on this line the other day, and I had reason to believe that the lady
in question had some remarks to make to me of a somewhat incisive character. I may or may
not have deserved them. I admit that it was three o’clock in the morning when I got home,
at least I think so; but on the other hand I don’t often do it, I had met friends, my watch had
stopped, the cold punch was good, and the night was very hot. However, I was clearly
going to catch it, tor Mrs. Grundy desired me to close the door in the middle of the carriage,
and then she herself pulled up its window in rather—I must say—a menacing manner. I do
not usually read on railways, all doctors say that nothing is more ruinous to the eyesight,
but on this occasion I plunged, head over ears, into the Cherbourg fetes.
Before Mrs. Grundy’s warning cough was
over (she caught it, of course, not waiting
in the wind for the cab after Alfred Mellon’s
Concert, but sitting up in a comfortable room
for me) a gentleman in the other compartment
put the window down again.
I was obliged, at Mbs. Grundy’s instance,
to commence a row, in the course of which
1 called him names, but I hereby privately
signify to him that I was very much obliged
to him, as the wrangle prevented the lecture,
and took all the steam out of Mrs. Grundy.
But, Sir, as one may have pleasant things
to say to a lady, as well as unpleasant ones to
hear from one’s wife, in a carriage, please
inform me what is the law of the Middle Win-
dow on the Great Western, and oblige
Yours very faithfully,
Democritus Grundy.
Pemhridge Terrace.
THE
SALUTATION AT CHERBOURG.
Air—“ The Death of Nelson."
Recitative.
O’er good Bordeaux, at moderate cost pos-
sessed,
Britannia cracks her filberts with a zest;
May those light wines be hers no end of years,
And in exchange Erance take our ales and
beers!
Air.
’Twas we, in Cherbourg gay.
That with the Erenchmen lay,
Each heart was jolly then.
Amid the fire and smoke.
Our ships were iron and oak,
And ditto were our men.
Our Dacres marked them on the wave ;
Three cheers their friends our seamen gave,
Nor thought of war and booty.
The Captains had an extra can
Of grog served out to every man,
And hollaing was a duty.
The harmless cannons roar
Along the crowded shore—
Our Dacres led the way:
His ship the Edgar named,
Long be that Edgar famed!
No man got drunk that day;
We drank no more than what we ought.
Our brave allies’ good-will we sought,
And not their lives and booty.
From mouth to mouth the saying ran,
“ This is the way for every man
To have to do his duty.”
No death, nor any wound.
From guns that did but sound,
A single breast received ;
No harm on either side.
“ Hip, hip, hooray ! ” we cried,
M To see what fun we ’ve lived !
Hate between French and English past.
And French and English friends at last;
Free trade for war and booty.”
So Gladstone ends what Peel began,
And England will confess that man
Has rather done his duty.
A Slight Confusion.
A Paragraph in a contemporary, relating
the bold attempt of a nurse to collar a burglar,
is headed, “ Burglary and Courageous Conduct
of a Woman.” Is not this rather putting
the cart before the mare, to the mare’s wrong ?
The woman distinguished herself by coura-
geous conduct, but did not commit Burglary.
F