Punch (55.1868)

December 26, 1868.]

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

267

THEATRICAL REFORMERS.

Old playgoers
may complain
of the decline
of the drama,
and say that
nothing on
the stage is
ever nowadays
worth seeing:
but consider-
ing that all the
old theatres
are flourishing,
and that a
brace of new
ones have been
lately built and
opened, it
would seem
that people

generally differ from old playgoers. The more playhouses the merrier,
let us hope will be the case : and may the Globe and Gaiety succeed for
■many a season in pleasantly contributing to the gaiety of the globe.
That success is well deserved in the instance of the Gaiety should be
allowed by all who read this comment in the Times:—

“ One reform deserves special notice, and it is that all fees, donations, or
gratuities to attendants are under any and every pretence prohibited. There
is to be no fee for booking, no charge for bills, no charge for taking care of
coats, cloaks, or hats. The one payment at the door clears everything. This
is a radical improvement, and one which will soon force other theatres where
the attendants live by open mendicancy, and where a programme is often not
to be had at a less price than a shilling, to follow an example which should
have been set long before.”

Theatres, like Tories, are slow at all reforms: and a century or so
hence, when all the playhouses in London will have followed this
•example of abolishing all fees for cloak-rooms, bills, and box-keepers,
the critics of the period may dispute as to the theatre where this
reform was started first. If they will turn then to their Punch, they
will find it here recorded that it was not at the Gaiety, but at the New
Adelphi, where fees for bills and box-keeping were primarily abolished ;
and for being the only other manager to follow the precedent of Mr.
Benjamin Webster, Mr. Hollingshead of the Gaiety will share with
him the honour of living for posterity in the immortal page of Punch.

PUNCH’S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

December II: Monday. Ninety-three oaths were taken, making
above five hundred which Members had fired off as a salute to the
'Queen. Then Mr. George Glyn swore he would have no more of it,
•and cleared the House.

The Commons, three hundred strong, returned to their own House,
and the Speaker reported what had taken place during their presence
in the other. This was a delicate but not precisely a necessary atten-
tion, as they had all heard the message. Then there was more swearing—
about fifty oaths were taken.

Mr. Ayrton, for the first time in office, made a speech about Election
Petitions, and a great number of gentlemen visibly shuddered. He
reminded the House that the Judges of the Common Pleas were thence-
forth to judge election grievances. In the absence of Mr. Gladstone
and his other chiefs, it would be inconvenient to discuss anything, and
he should move for new writs only in cases where the time for petition-
ing had expired. Then they would adjourn until the 29th, and on that
day the other writs would be moved. But where a petition had been
presented, but the seat was not claimed (youTl see what this meant,
directly) the course was to let the writ issue.

Then, amid enormous cheering, he moved the Greenwich writ, for
Mr. Gladstone.

He moved Oxford, London University, Pontefract, and when he
came to Birmingham, there were loud cheers, on both sides of the
House, at mention of the llight Honourable John Bright.

He moved London. But there is a petition against the three Liberal
Members, and Mr. Gosci-ien, President of the Poor Law Board, is one
of them. Some discussion took place, but Sir Roundell Palmer

[Punch hopes that you understand, foreigners especially, that this
gentleman might have been Lord Chancellor, if he had only chosen to
resign his conviction that the Irish Church ought not to be destroyed.
How many people with so splendid a prize dangling within reach would
not have modestly felt that their conviction must have been wrong,
since so many good and clever men held a different one—and taken the
office and coronet ?]

said—the House on both sides had the grace to cheer him vehemently—
that it was clear that the writ ought to issue. It did, and Mr. Goschen
was re-elected on Monday last.

Writs for Mr. Layard, Mr. Childers, Mr. Stanseeld, and others
—thirteen in all—were issued, as was one for Wareham, where death
made a vacancy.

A great many Notices of Motion were given, some most desirable,
some utterly absurd. But sufficient for the day is the debate thereof.
When the motions are made. Punch will know how to deal with them.

The House rose until the 29th, and it will be particularly jolly for
forty gentlemen to have to be in town on that day, instead of being
out of it with their amiable wives and lovely families ; or, in the case of
bachelors, flirting in country houses. But we dare say that a Residuum
will be found to listen to Mr. Glyn’s Whip. The Chancellqr of
tile Exchequer ought to give these patriots a jovial dinner in the
Tea Room at the national expense, by way of commencing his pro-
mised reduction of expenditure. We ’ll come, if we ’re asked, as we
shall be bored with family parties by that time—or earlier.

Mr. Punch wishes you all a Merry Christmas—not that this has any-
thing particular to do with Parliament—but he appears just forty-
eight hours before the Eestival, and likes to be polite. However,
you needn’t accept the compliment unless you like. He’s sure he
doesn’t care.

/\

“ De Amicitia.”

Tuesday. The Lords met, and sent for the Commons. Then-did
Lord Hatherley, the new Lord Chancellor, olim Sir Page Wood,
•deliver a neat little Message from the Queen without spilling any of
■it. He informed his hearers that divers vacancies had occurred in the
House of Commons, by reason that divers Members had accepted
offices. It was Her Majesty’s pleasure that an opportunity be given
'for supplying these vacancies, and. that, after a Suitable Recess, Parlia-
ment should proceed to the consideration of such matters as would
ffhen be laid before it.

Then did the Commons walk off, and the Chancellor went out and
•made a magnificent toilette, and re-appeared in all the glory of full
-robes. He then knelt down before the Royal Chair, but to show that
he was not afraid ol that handsome piece of furniture, lie rose, and
then kneeling down again, gave it a playful poke with his patent of
ipeerage. A1 ext he got up and went to the table, but did not kneel to
'that, or even poke it, but only swore. Then he went to a back bench
-and sat down humbly as a m..re Baron, but he promptly got up and
■took his seat haughtily on the Dukes’ row, to show his right, as
'Chancellor, to precedence. Sticking to neither of these seats, he then
went, and got upon the woolsack, which we hope he found pretty
■comfortable. This pleasing pantomime being over,

Earl Granville came out in a very little farce. He told every-
body a grand piece of news, namely that Mr. Disraeli’s administration
had been succeeded by that of Mr. Gladstone, and his Lordship
•hoped that their Lordships would not think it unreasonable if his
Lordship moved their Lordships’ adjournment until Thursday the
11th February, 1869. Apparently their Lordships did not think it un-
reasonable at all, at any rate nobody objected, and they all went away.

On the whole Mr. Punch is inclined to be glad that the Intelligent
Foreigner was not present at these performances.

Speaking of the Emperor of the French, the Paris Correspondent
of the Pall Mall Gazette says,

“ His Majesty was visited the other day by an old and bluff-spoken friend,
M. Laity. He was about to consult that gentleman on public opinion when
the Empress intervened,” &c.

Remembering the influence under which the Empress is supposed to
act, the obvious comment on the above is, that the Emperor’s friend
is Laity, the Empress’s-Clergy.

A Great Compliment.

“ It is said that the decree which fixes 75 years as the limit, on attaining
which the First President of the Court of Cassation is obliged to retire from
the Bench, is about to he revised for the sake of M. Troplong, who has long
held that office. M. Troplong, though 75, is still with his faculties unim-
paired, and, moreover, he is too useful to he dispensed with. In any case, his
retirement from the Court of Cassation would not necessarily require him to
give up the Presidency of the Senate.”—Paris Correspondent of the Times.

Punch congratulates the venerable President, for it is evident that
long as he has served, lie is not thought to have served too long.

THE EASTERN BORE.

It is said that, “ when Greek meets Greek then comes the tug of
war.” Never mind that; but, for the peace of Europe, let us hope
that, when Greek meets Turk the case will prove otherwise.

Elies in Amber.—Yellow Cabs.

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