Punch (55.1868)

Octoeer 31, 1868.]

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

“TIMERE DANAOS,” &.C.

Young Fangio. “Look here, Briggs. You know it’s Inconvenient for
me to Settle that little Account of yours now ; and if you come
Bothering about it, hang me if I don’t Order another Suit of you ! ”

HALLO ! HALL AM SHIRE !

Come, blades of Sheffield, show your good temper. If there is one place in the
world that Mr. Punch has patronised, it is Sheffield. Why, didn’t lie go down to
Sir John Brown’s works, and at the risk of his own precious health observe the
making armour-plates for ships, and drink enough to float any decent-sized iron-;
dad in the service-? Did not he send one of the most elegant of his young men \
to inaugurate a fountain there—is not the fountain there now to speak for itself ? |
Well, then, go to—what’s all this about Mr. Roebuck? What has Mr. Roe-
buck done, or not done, that there should be ill-feeling against him ? Has Punch
omitted to rebuke Mr. Roebuck, when the latter has failed to satisfy him ? And ,
has Punch had occasion to rebuke him for many a year? A'ery well, then, if;
Punch has seen no fault in the Member for Sheffield, it is not for the men of Sheffield
to be captious. Roebuck is one of the most honest, most free-spoken, and most
unrewarded of Radicals, and if Sheffield proves ungrateful to a veteran, Mr. Punch
will, with regret, feel compelled morally to disfranchise Sheffield. But he believes
better things of the warm-hearted Hallamshire fellows, and is' sure that they will
not give cynics a just cause for sneering at the ingratitude of the many. Rally
to Roebuck, and here’s all your good healths, blades of Sheffield.

ANOTHER INSURRECTION IN SPAIN.

Ant—“ Another llorrid Murder."—Street Ballad.

Another insurrection
In Spain we must unfold ;

And scarce a year without one
Of late has ever rolled.

No means but fighting and bloodshed,

To turn a Government out !

The other side did bide their time,

Then turn and turn about.

Those Spanish Dons did shoot and slay
Each other in so prompt a way.

Duke General de la Torre
He did the insurgents head,

And Prim went from Southampton,

To join them, it was said.

Gonzalez Bravo and his lot
Straightway did cut and run,

So did Her Majesty the Queen;

Best thing she could have done.

An evil day it was for Spain,

When she did first begin to reign.

Whichever side were victors,

We feared what they would do,

In cold blood shoot the vanquished—
More murders must ensue.

The priests, confessing the victims.

Would have, another time.

To do as much for the conquerors.

Who’d expiate their crime
The worst of it when they had got;

Come, in rotation, to be shot.

How wrnuld it be, if Gladstone
Were to conspire with Bright,

To overthrow Disraeli
By force and arms downright ?

In case of being successful.

If they were to condemn,

And shoot, him, Stanley, Pakingtom,

Or else get shot by them ?

Why what should we cousider, then,
Right Honourable Gentlemen ?

To point Queen Isabella
The way that she should go,

Her guides were Bather Claret,

Sor Patrocinio.

If there had been such advisers
About the British Throne,

The late and present state of Spain
Might now have been our own.

Let Ritualists dominion get.

And we may be as happy yet.

But Spain is now improving,

Has kicked the Jesuits out,

And sent the nuns and friars
Unto the right about.

A bloodless nnld revolution
She now seems going through ;

But those famed “ Spanish marriages ”
See what they have come to.

Let foreigners’ affairs alone

To right themselves—and mind your own.

*

i

*

THE IRISH CHURCH.

The Dean of Dromore wrote to the Times to deny that the Irish Deans had
got a bit too much money from the Irish Church. His Reverence forgot to say
mat—

The Dean of Perns is a Vegetarian.

The Dean of Tuam hasn’t got anything that he calls “ Meam,” as it’s all
Tuam.

The Dean of Elchin lives like a Dairy.

The Dean of Connor is a strict e-Connor-mist.

But of all deans give us, at all events at luncheon, Sar-dines, when one may
fairly say, on ne dine pas.

Fortunately, an Error.

Great excitement prevailed in Westminster last week,
owing to the appearance in the Times of an advertisement
headed “ Grosvenor and Mills for Westminster.” If it
had been Grosvenor and Chadwick, the astonishment
could hardly have been greater, nobody appearing to know
who Mills was, or why he had taken the place of one
of the present Members. The tumult was not allayed
until a corrected announcement made it clear that West-
minster had not lost the chance of being again represented
by one of the greatest of living Englishmen—John Stuart
Mill.