DOI Heft:
August 28, 1869
DOI Seite / Zitierlink: https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16884#0089
August 28, 1869.]
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVAPJ.
77
ascertain that this is not, the only door with their names on it. There
are doors to the right, to the left—
[Happy Thought (don't know why it occurs now, but suppose I am.
•nervous)- « Doors to tbe right 0f me,
" Doors to 1he left of me,
" Rode the Six Hundred."
only it wasn't " doors "—it was " cannon" or "foes "]—and on all the
doors is "Popgood and Giioolly "
he wants ?" Because, really and truly, Typical Developments would suit
all readers.
I say, "It is rather difficult to explain, as it comprises a vast
variety of subjects."
"It's not," says Popgood, or Groolly, "a collection of tales, I
mean such as we could brinsr out, with illustrations, at Christmas ? "
I am obliged to say, "No, it's not that," though I wish at the
moment I could turn it into that, just to please Popgood and Groolly.
" We should be open for something on this model," says Popgood,
There isVgrVarderrofnoisrfrom some quarterns of machinery J or Groolly producing a thin book with green and yellow binding,
(not unlike the sounds vou encounter on entering the Polytechnic), j atnd coloured illustrations about Puss in Boots. "It went," he adds,
and I deliberate as to which door I shall go in bv. I see, on a wall, a I, yfJ well last Christmas. It occurs to me that the letter written
nourishing hand pointing up some stone steps to "Clerks' Office j ^ Boodels relative must haye given Popgood and Groolly quite a
Up-Stairs " I "wron? notion ot Typ. Bevel. He seems to have introduced me as an
Happy ThougU.-Go up and see a clerk. author oi Nursery Books.
The passages are all deserted. They are divided into, it seems, different \ Happy Thought—lo I think Typical Developments would lllus-
rooms; every room has its ground-glass window. Perhaps numbers of \ *rate verv well-
It appears this is the first time he has heard the title. " A religious
work p" he inquires. " Well—no, Mr. Popgood," I am about to say
pleasantly, only it occurs to me, as a Happy Thought, that if he is
Groolly he won't like being called Popgood, so I reply, " Not exactly
religious." Peeling that perhaps I have gone too far here, I correct
myself with, " But, of course, not atheistical."
Popgood, or Groolly, considers. " We are very busy just now, and
our hands are quite full," he says. "Everything is very dull-
{Happy Thought.—" Except Typical Developments." But I don't, say
it]—and it's a bad time of year for bringing out a book of the—of
the—nature you intimate."
I say, to put it clearly and help him along, that it's something after
the style of a Dictionary. At this Popgood, or Groolly, appears much
relieved, and says, "It's a bad time just now for bringing out Die-
people can see me, though I can't see them. Perhaps Popgood and
Groolly are examining me from somewhere, and seeing what I'm
like, and settling how they '11 deal with me.
Happy Thought.—To walk to the end of the passage, and if I don't
meet any one, come back again.
I do meet some one, however,—a clerk, bustling. He inquires of
me, hastily, "Whom do you want, Sir?" 1 reply, "Well—"rather
hesitatingly, as if I either didn't wish to commit myself with a subor-
dinate, or hadn't an excuse at hand for being in there at all. (By the
way, I never knew publishers had clerks. I had always thought
that a publisher was, as it were, a sort of Literary Judge or Critic, who
said, "Yes, I'll print your book, and send it to the booksellers."
Certainly varied experience enlarges the mind.) " Well,"—I continue
V yrP|yn_rnIn^anVr.SnnTP°P"^r" vM^'^V11 \t' tionaries, even,"'he adds,," if they were in our line." lt~appears, from
harly, Popgood and Groolly, and substitute, Mr Popgood or Mr. , further conver^tion, thatWooo and Groolly did once bring out a
Groolly. Ihe brisk cerk says, This way, mi I follow him into ! Dictionary in month]y partSj whlch near]y proved fatal to th°m< j
a small room, with a small clerk in it, who, it appears doesn t know if : kin t{ t th h / *d it' ^ ft ' £fo f Dictionary, yet it
Mr Popgood or Mr. Groolly is disengaged but wiU take m my name. I ^ not me;d Dictionary, but if j read hfm a Httle of it ^ • ou]d
I fancy they are eyeing my manuscript. I feel that the appearance jud better f Mmself- fae bowS- T take the M§ off the'table. It
of the roll of MS. is against me. It I could only have come to see , Jlg al[ curled and »t properly. I tell him I will select any
Popgood and Groolly for pleasure, it strikes me I should have been : at ^.^rd. He bows again. It is difficult. Something
shown m at once But I can imagine (while I am waiting, having aboutd« p0rms in a Primeval Forest" catches my eye. I wonder if
written my name down on a slip of paper) the little clerk hinting to ; that 1S a good specimeil to read tohim. I've forgotten what it's about.
Popgood and Groolly that the visitor has a manuscript with him; m \ TT m, f, m , j e ■ i • a-
which case Popgood and Groolly, being taken by surprise, and not \ Thought.-To heg his pardon for a minute, just to gain time,
liking it won't be at home a c m7 e.ve 0Yer *t> to see it 1 can get at the meaning at once, so
The little clerk returns/and savs, " Will I step this way ? " I step \ as Tnot to §lve lt ™liwrong emphasis,
his way, and, feeling very hot and' uncomfortable (much as I did when ! , 1 commence, with Popgood s, or Groolly s, eye upon me Ihe first
I was about to propose to Fridoline in the conservator), I am fo™s> or Protoplastic creations have in themselves such interest to us
suddenly ushered into Popgood and Groolly's private office. The of the present day, that— then follows a hard word scratched out,
boy pauses by the door a minute, apparently curious to see what we '11 and I have to read on to lirid out what it ought to be. I can t imagine
do to each other, for here sits either Popgood, or Groolly, I don't wLat tius confounded word was.
know which, in a chair between a large writing-table and the fender. I Happy Thought—To say this is only a mere prelude, and to pass on
I think the clerk mentions the Gentleman's name, but I can't catch it. ! to a paragraph lower down.
Popgood, or Groolly, rises slightly, bows, and indicates a chair on The door (not the one I came m oy, but another on the opposite
the opposite side of the hearthrug to where he is sitting. side) opens, and in comes a tall, bluff gentleman with a beard. Ihe
I bow to him. So far nothing could be more pleasant or charming, j clerical person to whom I am reading introduces him.
My hat suddenly becomes a nuisance, and I don't know whether to i Happy Thought—Shall now know which is Popgood and which
put my hat on the table, and my MS. on the floor, or vice versa. Hat Groolly.
on floor. MS. on table. He introduces him as " My Partner." Popgood and Groolly are
Happy Thought.—Ho say, " I think you had a letter of introduction before me. If I only knew which was which, I could carry on the
to me—I mean—about me, from Mr. Boodels." j conversation so much more pleasantly.
It seems so formal to call him Mr. Boodels, that the interview at | Happy Thought—To say "Well, Mu. Groolly," and look at both of
once assumes the air of a sort of state ceremony. ! them. One of the two must acknowledge his name.
Popgood, or Groolly, bows again. I wish I knew which it was. ; He doesn't. Both bow.
He is elderly, and rather clerical in appearance. I should imagine him ! Happy Thought—Try "Mr. Popgood" next time-
to be Popgood. I don't like to dash in quickly with " Now I'll read
you Typical_ Developments, Vol. i." though that would be the way to
come to business.
Happy Thought.—To talk to him about Boodels ; to make Boodels
pro tern, the subject of conversation, to give us, as it were, common
ground to start on.
I remark, that (taking it for granted that Popgood, or Groolly,
knows Boodels) he is a capital fellow ; a great friend of mine ; that he
has (this I say patronisingly) written several little things, and—in fact
—oh yes, he is a very good fellow. Popgood, or Groolly, replies that
he hasn't the pleasure of Boodels' acquaintance, and that it was a
relation of his " from whom we (the firm of P. and G.) received this
letter."
Happy Thought—To ask, Did he mention what my Work was ?
Popgood, or Groolly (somehow 1 begin to think it is Groolly), says,
" No he did not. What may be—" he inquires rather sleepily, as if 1
had failed to interest him up to this point, " What may be the nature
of the work ? "
Happy Thought.—To stop myself from answering hastily, " Well, I
don't know," which in my nervousness I was going to do.
I hesitate. I should almost like to ask him " What sort of thing
STANZAS IN THE ZOOLOGICAL GARDENS.
{To the White Bear during the late Weather.)
I envy thee, thou Polar Bear,
Whilst in thy tank I see thee roll,
However, not as thou art there,
But polarised at thine own Pole.
Those other Bears, the neighbouring lot,
That dwell together in their pit;
A Pole themselves have also got,
And, when they choose, can climb up it.
To that performance, with a bun,
Be tempted though they often may,
They'd into bear's grease melt and run
With such an effort this hot day.
The Dunmow Flitch.—Ali Gammon.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVAPJ.
77
ascertain that this is not, the only door with their names on it. There
are doors to the right, to the left—
[Happy Thought (don't know why it occurs now, but suppose I am.
•nervous)- « Doors to tbe right 0f me,
" Doors to 1he left of me,
" Rode the Six Hundred."
only it wasn't " doors "—it was " cannon" or "foes "]—and on all the
doors is "Popgood and Giioolly "
he wants ?" Because, really and truly, Typical Developments would suit
all readers.
I say, "It is rather difficult to explain, as it comprises a vast
variety of subjects."
"It's not," says Popgood, or Groolly, "a collection of tales, I
mean such as we could brinsr out, with illustrations, at Christmas ? "
I am obliged to say, "No, it's not that," though I wish at the
moment I could turn it into that, just to please Popgood and Groolly.
" We should be open for something on this model," says Popgood,
There isVgrVarderrofnoisrfrom some quarterns of machinery J or Groolly producing a thin book with green and yellow binding,
(not unlike the sounds vou encounter on entering the Polytechnic), j atnd coloured illustrations about Puss in Boots. "It went," he adds,
and I deliberate as to which door I shall go in bv. I see, on a wall, a I, yfJ well last Christmas. It occurs to me that the letter written
nourishing hand pointing up some stone steps to "Clerks' Office j ^ Boodels relative must haye given Popgood and Groolly quite a
Up-Stairs " I "wron? notion ot Typ. Bevel. He seems to have introduced me as an
Happy ThougU.-Go up and see a clerk. author oi Nursery Books.
The passages are all deserted. They are divided into, it seems, different \ Happy Thought—lo I think Typical Developments would lllus-
rooms; every room has its ground-glass window. Perhaps numbers of \ *rate verv well-
It appears this is the first time he has heard the title. " A religious
work p" he inquires. " Well—no, Mr. Popgood," I am about to say
pleasantly, only it occurs to me, as a Happy Thought, that if he is
Groolly he won't like being called Popgood, so I reply, " Not exactly
religious." Peeling that perhaps I have gone too far here, I correct
myself with, " But, of course, not atheistical."
Popgood, or Groolly, considers. " We are very busy just now, and
our hands are quite full," he says. "Everything is very dull-
{Happy Thought.—" Except Typical Developments." But I don't, say
it]—and it's a bad time of year for bringing out a book of the—of
the—nature you intimate."
I say, to put it clearly and help him along, that it's something after
the style of a Dictionary. At this Popgood, or Groolly, appears much
relieved, and says, "It's a bad time just now for bringing out Die-
people can see me, though I can't see them. Perhaps Popgood and
Groolly are examining me from somewhere, and seeing what I'm
like, and settling how they '11 deal with me.
Happy Thought.—To walk to the end of the passage, and if I don't
meet any one, come back again.
I do meet some one, however,—a clerk, bustling. He inquires of
me, hastily, "Whom do you want, Sir?" 1 reply, "Well—"rather
hesitatingly, as if I either didn't wish to commit myself with a subor-
dinate, or hadn't an excuse at hand for being in there at all. (By the
way, I never knew publishers had clerks. I had always thought
that a publisher was, as it were, a sort of Literary Judge or Critic, who
said, "Yes, I'll print your book, and send it to the booksellers."
Certainly varied experience enlarges the mind.) " Well,"—I continue
V yrP|yn_rnIn^anVr.SnnTP°P"^r" vM^'^V11 \t' tionaries, even,"'he adds,," if they were in our line." lt~appears, from
harly, Popgood and Groolly, and substitute, Mr Popgood or Mr. , further conver^tion, thatWooo and Groolly did once bring out a
Groolly. Ihe brisk cerk says, This way, mi I follow him into ! Dictionary in month]y partSj whlch near]y proved fatal to th°m< j
a small room, with a small clerk in it, who, it appears doesn t know if : kin t{ t th h / *d it' ^ ft ' £fo f Dictionary, yet it
Mr Popgood or Mr. Groolly is disengaged but wiU take m my name. I ^ not me;d Dictionary, but if j read hfm a Httle of it ^ • ou]d
I fancy they are eyeing my manuscript. I feel that the appearance jud better f Mmself- fae bowS- T take the M§ off the'table. It
of the roll of MS. is against me. It I could only have come to see , Jlg al[ curled and »t properly. I tell him I will select any
Popgood and Groolly for pleasure, it strikes me I should have been : at ^.^rd. He bows again. It is difficult. Something
shown m at once But I can imagine (while I am waiting, having aboutd« p0rms in a Primeval Forest" catches my eye. I wonder if
written my name down on a slip of paper) the little clerk hinting to ; that 1S a good specimeil to read tohim. I've forgotten what it's about.
Popgood and Groolly that the visitor has a manuscript with him; m \ TT m, f, m , j e ■ i • a-
which case Popgood and Groolly, being taken by surprise, and not \ Thought.-To heg his pardon for a minute, just to gain time,
liking it won't be at home a c m7 e.ve 0Yer *t> to see it 1 can get at the meaning at once, so
The little clerk returns/and savs, " Will I step this way ? " I step \ as Tnot to §lve lt ™liwrong emphasis,
his way, and, feeling very hot and' uncomfortable (much as I did when ! , 1 commence, with Popgood s, or Groolly s, eye upon me Ihe first
I was about to propose to Fridoline in the conservator), I am fo™s> or Protoplastic creations have in themselves such interest to us
suddenly ushered into Popgood and Groolly's private office. The of the present day, that— then follows a hard word scratched out,
boy pauses by the door a minute, apparently curious to see what we '11 and I have to read on to lirid out what it ought to be. I can t imagine
do to each other, for here sits either Popgood, or Groolly, I don't wLat tius confounded word was.
know which, in a chair between a large writing-table and the fender. I Happy Thought—To say this is only a mere prelude, and to pass on
I think the clerk mentions the Gentleman's name, but I can't catch it. ! to a paragraph lower down.
Popgood, or Groolly, rises slightly, bows, and indicates a chair on The door (not the one I came m oy, but another on the opposite
the opposite side of the hearthrug to where he is sitting. side) opens, and in comes a tall, bluff gentleman with a beard. Ihe
I bow to him. So far nothing could be more pleasant or charming, j clerical person to whom I am reading introduces him.
My hat suddenly becomes a nuisance, and I don't know whether to i Happy Thought—Shall now know which is Popgood and which
put my hat on the table, and my MS. on the floor, or vice versa. Hat Groolly.
on floor. MS. on table. He introduces him as " My Partner." Popgood and Groolly are
Happy Thought.—Ho say, " I think you had a letter of introduction before me. If I only knew which was which, I could carry on the
to me—I mean—about me, from Mr. Boodels." j conversation so much more pleasantly.
It seems so formal to call him Mr. Boodels, that the interview at | Happy Thought—To say "Well, Mu. Groolly," and look at both of
once assumes the air of a sort of state ceremony. ! them. One of the two must acknowledge his name.
Popgood, or Groolly, bows again. I wish I knew which it was. ; He doesn't. Both bow.
He is elderly, and rather clerical in appearance. I should imagine him ! Happy Thought—Try "Mr. Popgood" next time-
to be Popgood. I don't like to dash in quickly with " Now I'll read
you Typical_ Developments, Vol. i." though that would be the way to
come to business.
Happy Thought.—To talk to him about Boodels ; to make Boodels
pro tern, the subject of conversation, to give us, as it were, common
ground to start on.
I remark, that (taking it for granted that Popgood, or Groolly,
knows Boodels) he is a capital fellow ; a great friend of mine ; that he
has (this I say patronisingly) written several little things, and—in fact
—oh yes, he is a very good fellow. Popgood, or Groolly, replies that
he hasn't the pleasure of Boodels' acquaintance, and that it was a
relation of his " from whom we (the firm of P. and G.) received this
letter."
Happy Thought—To ask, Did he mention what my Work was ?
Popgood, or Groolly (somehow 1 begin to think it is Groolly), says,
" No he did not. What may be—" he inquires rather sleepily, as if 1
had failed to interest him up to this point, " What may be the nature
of the work ? "
Happy Thought.—To stop myself from answering hastily, " Well, I
don't know," which in my nervousness I was going to do.
I hesitate. I should almost like to ask him " What sort of thing
STANZAS IN THE ZOOLOGICAL GARDENS.
{To the White Bear during the late Weather.)
I envy thee, thou Polar Bear,
Whilst in thy tank I see thee roll,
However, not as thou art there,
But polarised at thine own Pole.
Those other Bears, the neighbouring lot,
That dwell together in their pit;
A Pole themselves have also got,
And, when they choose, can climb up it.
To that performance, with a bun,
Be tempted though they often may,
They'd into bear's grease melt and run
With such an effort this hot day.
The Dunmow Flitch.—Ali Gammon.