Punch (59.1870)

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

43

PUNCH'S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

nday, July 18M.
Having announced
the War, and hav-
ing permitted En-
glish and French
statesmen to state
in these columns
their views of their
own conduct, we
propose to give
space to a portion
of the address of
t he North German
Parliament to their
"old and heroic
king," and thence-
forth to make only
the briefest refer-
ence to the Crime
which is exciting
the indignation of
all Christian and
civilised men :—

" One single thought animates all German hearts. It was with joy and
pride that the nation learnt the earnestness and dignity with which your
Majesty repelled the unheard-of presumption of France. The German people
desires to live at peace with those nations which respect its independence. As
at the time of the wars of Liberation a Napoleon forced us into a sacred
struggle, now, as then, calculations based upon the unfaithfulness of the
German States will be shattered by the force of the German people. The mis-
guided French nation will recognise, when it is too late, the bad seed it is
sowing, now that the most reasonable portion of their fellow countrymen have
failed to avert a great national crime. A hard and violent struggle is before
us. We rely upon the valour of our brothers in arms, who will not bend the
knee before a foreign invader. "We place our trust in our old and heroic
King, to whom Providence has granted that he should, in the eve of life,
bring to a close the war in which he fought in his vouth. We place our trust,
finally, in God, who will surely punish the wicked audacity of the invader.
Ttie people has risen unanimously, and public opinion throughout the world
recognises the justice of our cause."

To-night Earl Granville and Mr. Gladstone stated that a
Declaration of War having been forwarded from Paris to Berlin, our
Queen's Proclamation of Neutrality would at once issue. This has
appeared. It will be obeyed in letter and in spirit by Her Majesty's

subjects, but it must be remembered that there can be no Neutrality to his care, out of which funds he made illegitimate profit," we can
on a question of morals, and in these kingdoms public opinion has but listen in silence to Mk. West, who said:—
unmistakeablv expressed itself in reaard to the War, which England ,

holds to be needless, and therefore wicked. Be the issue what it, may, V a wretched boy robbed his master s till of eighteen-pence he was sent
British protest is placed on record, and, be it remembered, also, that t0 Prl,son' but >*f Public servant deprived the Exchequer of some thousands of
„ i(r p t>- i I j> 1 pounds, a morbid sympathy was raised lor him, and an outcry was raised it ne

Wrong never comes Right _ _ f 4, we dealt with according to law.''

Loud Kinnaird wanted to inquire into the management of the j .
Royal Mint, where he thinks matters are not managed economically. j Bathing, bathing—that is a pleasant topic for this weather. Not
Lord Lanstiowne defended the institution. No instructive remark that Mr Ayrton contributed an element of pleasantness to ir, for he
occurs to Mr. Punch, except that " mint" is from the Saxon mynet, abused the poor bathers in the Serpentine, and objected to do anything
and that the verb mynetian means "to coin." Perhaps you'll say you for t,he safety of "eccentric " skaters who go on the ice when it is
knew that. Bah! Perhaps you'll say you didn't want to know it. rotten. Lord John Manners justly complained that the Regent's
Boo ! Do you know what a mint-julep is ? A drink consisting of j park warer wa8 uot treated properly, but was kept too shallow. How-
brandy, sugar, and pounded ice, flavoured with sprigs of mint. Is not j ever> making a row does good; for on Sunday night, as Mr. Punch
that a pleasant thing to read about, this sultry weather? Go and caQ st;ate from personal observation with the aid of a cigar, water was
make some, and repent your ingratitude to your best friend. \ poured fiercely into the lake from that queer tube, which resembles a

Married Women's (why not Wives'?) Property Bill went through \ gigantic old hat. But the supply soon stooped, and no good will be
Committee. Observe, young husband ! It contains a clause, enabling | d01ie uui[[ r,uere is a regular flow. Mr. T. Chambers affirmed this,
you, when you assure your life, as every honest man who has no , aud spoke well. Lord Galway rather implied that be himself had
fortune, does, to make a declaration that the insurance is for your wife ; Deen drowned at some period in the course of his history, but we
and children. Then your friends Nipp, Shamgold, Weeds, Nebuchad- 1 rejoice to state that he appeared to be quite recovered. Mr. Hambro
nezzar, and other ministers to your vanity, self-indulgence, aud luxury, j sald that lf, would be as reasonable to fill up the ocean because a few
will not be able to deprive your family of the provision you have made, j persons were drowned yearly, as to make the Serpentine safe for the
Nextly, avoid vanity, self-indulgence, and luxury. ; same reason. The weather is hot, but really we expect a little more

Mr. Gladstone was not sure what he should do about the Uni- back-bone in argument,
versity Tests Bill, which Lord Salisbury has sent to a Committee. Jfipping Forest is going to be disafforested. Somebody had better
These are chemical tests, Mrs. Ramsbotham, which, when applied to a \00^ l0 this. It is a part of Waltham Forest—we have some idea that
Dissenter, make him look blue. our friend Mr. Anthony Trollope resides in that quarter. We

Small Massacre. Saviugs Bank Bill, Mines Regulation Bill, Ballot charge him with the duty of becoming a Vigilance Committee—we
Bill, perish, thanks to the flood of talk in which they drown, like COuld not nominate a better,
kittens.

Mr. Reid, Chief Constructor of the Navy, resigned, that he might
go into lucrative partnership with Sir Joseph Whitworth, but
thinking that in the present crisis his services might be useful, tendered
them to the Admiralty. "My Lords do not see occasion to avail
themselves of your offer." If that be what my Lords call civil,
Ayrtonism must be contagious.

In Supply there was some gun-talk, not uninteresting just now, even
to people who do not know a blunderbuss from a revolver. We are

considering the Mitrailleuse. It is to be feared that new information
as to its value will speedily be obtained. By the way, is this thing
called "new" ? Mr. Punch has a distinct recollection of having seen
one in the Tower, when he last took country cousins there, and that,
you may be sure, is a precious jolly long time ago. He bets that the
noble old Constable Btjrgoyne could lay his hand on the thing in
a minute. Don't let those foreigners claim the merit of everything.

Tuesday. Lord Shaetesbury begged leave to assure their Lord-
ships that he had not been Whipping them. Somebody, using the
Earl's name, had sent them a circular, desiring them to be in their
places, at a certain stage of the Ecclesiastical Courts Bill, but he would
not have been guilty of such arrogance. If Mr. Punch, who never
forgets anything, remembers rightly, the famous Chandos Peerage,
for which Sir Egerton Brydges fought a life-long battle (even
editing Collins' Peerage in nine volumes, that he might insert his
story of the case) was lost, through the Lords taking offence at being
addressed by the claimant, Sir Egerton's brother, in a circular similar
to that described by Lord Shaetesbury. Our aristocrats may be led
(though not by the Duke of Richmond) but will not be driven.

Christmas Day (the idea of its coolness is refreshing—but we must
do what we can with iced claret cup—what ho there, vassal!) is on
Sunday this year. Mr. Bruce does not see his way to enacting a
holiday on the Saturday. The grievance does not occur very often,
and the weekly Saturday half-holiday does.

Her Majesty responded to the Address against building public
offices on the Embankment. Nothing is to be done without the leave
of the House, and "no action is to be taken" (so this phrase has got
into Royal documents, eh ?) this year.
Education all the morning. Observed Mr. Newdegate :—

" It had been said that children were incapable of understanding the Bible,
but the practice of the Christian world for centuries confuted that assertion)
and he would put it to any man whether maxims and texts of Scripture taught
in his early life did not in time of trouble come to his memory for his
assistance."

Quite right, dear Mr. Newdegate, but it is also well the children,
young and old, should be made to understand the real meaning of
maxims and texts, on which there existeth not, as a rule, too much
clearness of apprehension, or there would not he so many bitter differ-
ences among good persons. Wherefore, we look with some hope to
the Jerusalem Chamber.

Poor old incarcerated Mr. Edmonds's case was brought on by
Mr. Russell Gukney. When a man who has lived in comfort is
poor, old, and in prison, compassion for him is so natural that we turn
to such an authority as Sir Roundell Palmer, and when he says,
Mr. Edmunds was a defaulter in respect of public funds committed

Wednesday. Mr. Taylor's Bill for abolishing the Game Laws was
abolished by 147 to 59. It is not a very good time to advocate such a
change, when men are counting days until the 12th of August. Go at
'eui, Taylor, when the season is just over, and they are recalling bad
shooting and the insolent exactions of keepers.

Twice this week have strangers been turned out of the House, that
a proposal for doing away with a valuable measure of medical police
might be debated. This makes no difference to Mr. Punch, who is