Punch (59.1870)

92

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

AT OUR CROQUET CLUB.

OwiNft to TfTR h>t SaN, AND temptation of ICED CLARET C'1!* UNDER the trees, VERY LITTLE CroQHF.T goes 0>t. HoWEVfR,

those ENtthGsric Members, Major Mallet and Miss Myrtle, make Arrangements for a Match, to come off Later in the
Yeaf.

THOUGHTS OF GEE AT MEN.

{Concluded.)

" What a beautiful sight is a perambulator filled with healthy
children ! To me this little machine is one of the most useful inventions
of modern civilisation, and only third to the steam-engine and the patent
feeding-bottle."—Malthls.

" Give me the ballot-box, and I will undertake to change the whole
aspect of affairs in this property-ridden nation—to substitute satisfac-
tion for discontent, prosperity for poverty, and a manly independence
of character in lieu of that degrading servility to the higher ranks
which now prevails to an intolerable extent."—Lord Eldon.

" Economy in small things is especially to be deprecated. Extra-
vagance is not waste; and a lavish expenditure, even though it may
not be supported by a commensurate income, affords gratification and
weekly wages to numbers, and is injurious to no one, except, perhaps,
to the man himself, and he ought to have read my works and known
better."—Adam Smith.

" Your beardless brainless ensign, your white-handed white-banded
stripling hot from College, your twenty-one year old senator—these be
the men to have power and rule, and to exercise authority over the
bodies and souls and substance of all those inferior creatures, to whom
fortune has denied the advantages of birth, and social position, and
carriage-horses, and admission to the tanks of the County Magistracy."

" Let girls have their own way early. Encourage them to spend
much of their time, money, and thoughts, in dress and personal adorn-
ment ; to use every artifice to attract the attention of the other sex ;
and to slight the dull, monotonous, routine of home pleasures and

duties for the excitements of Society, the caprices of fashion, and the
accomplishment of the supreme aim of woman's existence—a good
match."—Hannah More.

"Of all forms of Government a democracy is the most objectionable.
Nothing can equal a Monarchy, with its standing army, hereditary
peerage, and gold and silver sticks in waiting."—Oliver Cromwell.

"Liberty! I know nothing more pernicious. The licence of a
free press would be insupportable, the mischief of free speech inra1-
culabie. I would a thousand times rather that printing ink had never
been invented, than that it should be abused to disseminate, amongst
the humbler sorts of men, those notions of equality, and that spirit of
insubordination to constituted authority, which are the daugerous
sjmptoms of this levelling age."—Benjamin Franklin.

"To have nothing to do, to do it inefficiently, and to be well paid
for your trouble, that is my idea of a comfortable condition of life."—
Jeremy Bentham.

" Happiness does not consist in trifles. It is not to be found in
home enjoyments, in the society of an amiable and intelligent partner,
or in the run of a well-stocked fruit-garden on a sofc afternoon in the
month of August. Happiness is an affair of pomp, and state, and
etiquette, and hot theatres, and large dinuer-pwties, and a full suit ot
black clothes on a sultry evening in July."—Cowper.

" The Analysis of Ideas has still to be written, and the mill is not yet
erected which will produce the paper that shall record the results.
Whence they come, where they stay, whither they go, and what is
their mutual interdependence—these are all inscrutable problems to
baffle the wisest philosopher, and dismay the most arrogant thinker.
Are they innate eidola or merely intellectual secretions? Are they
conceived in a fLsh of instantaneous rapidity, or developed by a slow