Punch (60.1871)

March 18, 1871.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 11?

PICTORIAL SNOBBERIES.

British People, British. People,

WTiom aristocrats survey,
Looking down, as from a steeple,

In their supercilious way ;
In shop-windows, seeing pictures

There for vulgar persons placed,
They do, with derisive strictures,

Vilify the Public's taste.

" See," they say, " to feed low craving,

Everywhere in view displayed,
Thotographed, and in engraving,

Noble Youth and Royal Maid,
Represented as ajipearing

On demand, and form and face,
Showing off before the cheering

Plausive British populace.

" Drawn in Scotch costume, advancing

With the Daughter of the Crown,
There's Loud Loene, the Couple dancing

To the footlights, as 'twere, down."
But such prints please Britain's Nation

Not; please British snobs alone:
Suited to their admiration

Of the Peerage and the Throne.

A MARTYR TO PRINCIPLE.

When Me. B-obeet Haediment, who has been
imprisoned in IS orwich Castle for bribery at the Norwich
Parliamentary election of November, 1868, and the
Norwich Municipal election of November, 1869, was
released the other day, his friends escorted him in an
open carriage drawn by gray horses, with banners
displayed, and two brass bands playing " Auld Lang
Syne."

The one brass band, we suppose, was in honour of
the Parliamentary bribery, the other of the municipal.

A French admirer of British institutions, now here for
the purpose of studying our representative system, was
much edified, and remarked, " C'est sortir de prison
hardiment! "

An " Elastic Band."—The Marriage Tie (in the
Divorce Court).

"FAINT PRAISE."

Volunteer Officer {Amateur Baritone, and considered only second to Mr. Santley ia
Musical Circles). " Do you Think the Men hear me, Sergeant?"

Sergeant of the Guards (considerately). " We shall do Better by-and-dy,
Sir. Your Voice requires Cultivation ! "

A PUNCH PROPHECY.

Ma. Punch is the original True Thomas. His words are never
untrue— unless he means them to be so—which he seldom does ; in
fact only on the occasions in respect to which the True Thomas of
fiction offered his remonstrance to the Oueen of Faery. The latter
Thomas energetically protested against being favoured with " a
tongue that could never lee."

" My tongue is my ain," then Thomas he said,

A gudely gift ye wad gie to me !
I neither dought to buy or sell,

At fair or tryst where I might be.
I dought neither speak to priest or peer,

Nor ask of grace from fair ladye."

Reserving his rights in the above emergencies, and one or two
others, Mr. Punch habitually speaketh with the tongue that "cannot
lee." As an instance of his prophetic gift, he invites perusal of the
following brief passage from a dialogue which he gave to the
universe on the 16th of January, 1869. The conversation, between
the exiled young Prince of Spain, and the Prince Imperial of
France, comprised these words :—

" Prince Imperial. My Papa's dynasty is secure.

Prince of Asturia. How do you know that, my dear Louis ?

Prince Imperial. Whisper. He knows all about it. He gives the Mar-
shals all they desire, and keeps them in the best temper with us.

Prince of Asturia. You are a year older than I am, Louis, and therefore
I must not teach you. But I will only say that my Mamma did
exactly the same, and here we are."

Mr. Punch reprints this, not out of the vanity of proving his own
prescience, which all the world acknowledges, but in order to say
that what was to happen was to happen, that illustrious exiles are
heartily welcome to England, and that he does hope that their
privacy will be respected.

THE TWO ENDS OF A CANDLISH.

Me. Candlish would have us put down

Compulsory Vaccination,
And pay off the National Debt

By stern self-abnegation,

To the stout M.P. for Sunderland,

Mr. Punch recommends
The proverb that warns 'gainst lighting

Your Candlish at both ends.

To such double lighting in this case,
The objection's a specially strong one,

When, if Candlish has one right end,
He has also, as clearly, a wrong one.

But let's hope he's as unlikely

Vaccination law to upset,
As we fear he's to coax the Nation

Into paying the National Debt.

MONMOUTH AND SOMERSET.

Monmouth has returned Someeset. This announcement is ex-
plained by the following newspaper paragraph:—

"The Kepresentation op Monmouth.—Lord Henry Somerset was
elected, unopposed, for Monmouthshire on Saturday morning. His Lordship
announced himself a Conservative, and denounced the state of the Army and
Navy."

With regard to military and naval affairs, then, the new Member
for Monmouthshire is a Reformer. As such, if he do the State ser-
vice, Monmouth will have to be congratulated on not having Hang a
Somerset.

Vol. 60.

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