Punch (67.1874)

144

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [Octobek 3, 1874.

RATHER SUSPICIOUS.

First Passenger. “Had pretty good Sport?”

Second Passenger. “No—very Poor. Birds wild—Rain in Torrents—Dogs no use. 'Only got Fifty Brace!’’

First Passenger. “ 'Make Birds dear, won’t it?”

Second Passenger (“ off his guard”). “You’re right. I assure you I paid Three-and-Sixpence a Brace all round at
Norwich this Morning ! ”

A CHRISTIAN SCHOOL OF SCIENCE.

The days are past, nor ever can return,

When Science shuddered at a Church’s banning :
Now Catholics who for instruction yearn
At Capel’s College may right freely learn,

And read wise essays, edited by Manning.*

Rome finds in England’s life more bracing air,

And is constrained to organise a neo-
Catholicism, whose votaries will beware
Of shocking any possible Lothair
By vetoing the tube of Galileo.

Yet if men search the secrets of the sky,

And read the records writ on flint and granite,
They must be ready for whate’er reply
Comes to the eager philosophic eye
As to the history of this marvellous planet.

“ v ^Fristian School of Science ” seems to show
1 oregone conclusions as the teacher’s staple :

A strange new thought might be a fatal blow,

And that surprise would never do, you know,
Archbishop Manning, Monsignore Capel.

There’s to geometry no royal road,

So said in ancient days a great philosopher:
Irom ultra monies, Miracle’s abode,

To where Truth teaches her eternal code,

Punch sadly fears it will be hard to cross over.

* Henry S. King : 1874. A Third Series.

BISMARCK’S MASTER MIND.

Although inflexible, if necessary, in pursuing a foreign policy of
“blood and iron,” Prince Bismarck in domestic life can unbend.
The other day, at Yarzin, he gave all his farm-servants, male and
female, a grand feast, followed by a ball in celebration of harvest-
home. Soon after the waltzing had commenced, the Prince and his
Princess entered the saloon, and joined in the festivities. The
Princess “ danced with one of the labourers once, and then played
the part of a spectator.” But as for Bismarck himself:—

“The Prince danced with all the girls on his estate, but not until he had
given his first partner a lesson in the art.”

This incident is mentioned in a piece of news under heading of j
“Prince Bismarck At Home.” It shows him at home in the
capacity of a dancing-master. Thus Bismarck is proved to be
more of a master mind even than he is reputed. From his having
danced with all the girls on his estate, it is evident that he is an
indefatigable dancer. Who has ever dreamt that Prince Bismarck
would remind him of Sir Christopher Hatton ? Yet if Queen
Elizabeth had a dancing Chancellor, so, it appears, has Emperor
William.

Now it is known that Bismarck dances, the dance-musicians will
most likely get hold of him, and produce Bismarck waltzes and
quadrilles, or perhaps something new in polkas or mazurkas, which j
they will call the Bismarquienne. Withal, pictures of a beautified
Bismarck, with blooming cheeks and an Adonis figure in the fullest
evening dress, may be expected to appear very shortly in shop-
windows on the lids of music-books.

A “Free” Breakeast-Table.—One that makes rude remarks
to its own Spirit-medium.