Punch: Punch (70.1876)

156

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[April 22, 1876.

WHAT WE MAY LOOK FORWARD TO,

now that the aristocracy is taking to trade.

Lord Plantagenct (to fair Customer, who hasjtcst given an enormous order for Sugar, Soap, and Pickles). " Any other Article to-day,
Madam ?"

Fair Customer. " Ek—well—a—I hear your Sister-in-Law, the Duchess of Pentonville, is going to give a Garden
Party at Fulham. Eh—would it be asking too much if I were to beg of her Grace, through you, the favour of an
Invitation foe myself and my two Daughters?"

Lord Plantagenct. " It shall be seen to, Madam !"

" SILENT SPIRIT."

Both Pat and Sandy

At a light are handy,
Though the Scot be as stolid as his foeman is frisky ;

So no wonder the shindy

Waxes warm and windy,
"When the combatants are Celts and the casus belli Whiskey ?

Says Pat, " By japers,

Here's Old luck at his capers,
Changin' good sperrits to evil, blendin' Scotch stuff wid potheen !

Wid the blessin' o' St. Pathrick,

I '11 be stoppin' that thrick.
'Tis not in Oireland's eye you'll find the wearin' of the Green."

Sly Sandy answers " Eh, mon,

Ye ken we find it pay, mon!
Where there's bawbees to be got, where's the foe Scots winna
grapple ?

To drink yon Irish toddy

It wad just need a body
Wi' a wame o' whinstane, and airn-linin' to his thrapple."

Says Mr. Punch, " Good spirit

"Will assert its merit,
WTiether it reek of Scotia's peat or of green Erin's soil;

But ' pure ' or ' blended,'

Be no brand befriended
That owes its fire to vitriol, its smack to fusel oil."

'Twixt " Glasgow " and Dublin " '
_ Punch will not be troublin'

His Rhadamanthine judgment to divide the laurels ;

But he's nothing loath,
In a tumbler of both,
To drink health to each honest brand, and speedy truce to
quarrels !

And allow him to say,

In his own friendly way,
There are Members, Scotch and Irish, who, with all their merit,

Woidd be none the worse—

To put it plain and terse—■
For a rather larger " blending " of the " Silent Spirit" !

CAUSE AND EFFECT.

The Grand National Hunt seem to have had rare sport at their
meeting at Bogside (Ayrshire), last week. It is interesting to learn,
from the report in the"Scotsinan, that—'1 The object of the Hunt is
the encouragement of the breeding, rearing, and schooling of first-
class hunters." And this is how it's done :—

" The Eglinton Handicap of 12 sovs. each, with 200 soys., &c. . . There
was no change till the plough near the bottom turn, where Solon dropped
down dead, and Zero, heading Furley, came on and won in a canter by twenty
lengths.

" The Adamhill Cup, value 70 sovs., &c. . . . Student made play, fol-
lowed by Vagrant, which at the first hurdle came to grief, and threw Captain
Middleton, who had his shoulder dislocated.

"The Grand National Open Farmers' Plate of 75 sovs. . . . After
clearing the last hurdle, Percy staggered and fell dead, and Gamekeeper
finished a bad third."

From which it would appear that the educational curriculum of
the hunters is comprehensive enough to embrace within its limits
anything " from pitch and toss to manslaughter."