DOI Heft:
April 26, 1884
DOI Seite / Zitierlink: https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.17756#0209
ROUND THE STUDIOS'5 (OUTSIDE).-SEND1NG-SN DAY.
Chorus of Juvenile Critics. “ ’Oller Boys ! ’Ere ’k another Guy 1 ”
be so ill-bred as not to answer to bis name on the first time of ask-
ing, you will do well to repeat the summons in such a tone as will
command immediate attention. Then, when he returns, with exces-
sive pomposity, “Eh? I—er—beg your pardon, Sir—I think you
spoke to me,”—you, having, of course, the entire company with
you, will nod to him affably, and reply, “ Yes; I did. I was going
to ask you a question.” To which he will bow gracefully, and lend
a more or less willing ear. Having thus secured him, you will say,
“ I was only going to ask you, Sir Thomas, if you didn’t start in
life as a secondhand bird and dog fancier’s errand-boy in the
Seven Dials, that’s all ? ”
You needn’t wait for his answer, as, presuming you are well up in
your subject, you can go on pleasantly, and with an air of tender
interest to ask him, “ Do you ever see Did Bill Broker the rag-and-
i bone man, who was just round the corner by your shop ? ” And then
! you can express your curiosity as to what became of Old Bill’s pretty
| daughter, “ on whom ”—here you can throw a wink at the company
—“ you were rather sweet, Sir Thomas, in those days,—boy-like,
for she was seventeen, at least, and you couldn’t have been more
than twelve.”
This is only a single illustration of the rule, which you can develope
to its utmost extent in ordinary everyday practice. You will get
yourself immensely liked, and universally respected, and no dinner-
party or social gathering of any kind will be considered perfect
without your presence. Human nature is the same everywhere,
and you must adapt pour self to your company, not by a servile imi-
tation of their style, which in them is possibly an affectation, but by
judiciously introducing ichatever element is the most opposite to their
habits and demeanour.
Conversational Contrasts.—If you find yourself in a society
where everyone is lively, you must introduce the element of severe
gravity. Has Nature made everything green or sky-blue ? No.
Nature abhors a monotone, and, therefore, you will be but acting on
a natural principle, which the artificiality of Society has obscured,
when you introduce, as I have said, the element of severe melancholy
gravity into a lively and merry party.
Rule.—Be rollicking with the dismal, sprightly with the dull,
: wild with the sedate, uproarious with the quiet, inharmonious witn
the musical, seriously scientific with the frivolous, slow with the
fast, fast among the slow, an Agnostic with Theists, a Theist with
Agnostics, stupid with the talented, and talented with the stupid.
Example No. 1.—Suppose yourself at a lively party of wits, or
wags, where each man has his good story to tell, his joke to make, and
his quip to utter, and where all are ready to laugh on the slightest
provocation. It will he for you to adjust the balance. Do not hesitate
as to the course you are called upon, in the true interests of Society,
to pursue. Take your place at the table, and when the first jest has
set the table in a roar, do you preserve a decorous silence. Then,
when the laughter is finished, request to know what had so greatly
amused the company. The jest is sure to be imperfectly repeated by
the host, wTbo will be at once corrected by one of the guests, who, in
his turn, will be corrected by the perpetrator of the jest himself, and
by the time it has been accurately repeated to you, you will have
had the satisfaction of observing that the original concocter of the
joke is disgusted at the evident inability of those who had pretended
so much enjoyment from it to repeat it correctly, or even a part of it.
On its repetition to you, no one will have laughed a second time,
which in itself is sufficient proof that it was not worthy of their
approval on its first utterance. You will not move a muscle, but
will simply and sadly bow your head, with such an air of sad resig-
nation as would characterise your manner had you received the
confirmation of some melancholy news for which you were not
entirely unprepared.
Thus, you will have judiciously introduced the element of serious-
ness into a party where the evening would have been frittered away
in thoughtless, careless witticisms, and in the telling of useless tales,
and would have lasted, but for your well-timed action, until the
small hours of the' morning. In view of this possibility, take the
greatest care to be the last to leave, having, on your arrival, bestowed
your hat and coat in some safe place where you can find them, but
where nobody else can.
[This interesting subject, with rales, exceptions, and examples, 'will be
resumed next week, and continued until further notice.]
Yote Straight.—-Yes ; but be always careful to take a right aim.
Chorus of Juvenile Critics. “ ’Oller Boys ! ’Ere ’k another Guy 1 ”
be so ill-bred as not to answer to bis name on the first time of ask-
ing, you will do well to repeat the summons in such a tone as will
command immediate attention. Then, when he returns, with exces-
sive pomposity, “Eh? I—er—beg your pardon, Sir—I think you
spoke to me,”—you, having, of course, the entire company with
you, will nod to him affably, and reply, “ Yes; I did. I was going
to ask you a question.” To which he will bow gracefully, and lend
a more or less willing ear. Having thus secured him, you will say,
“ I was only going to ask you, Sir Thomas, if you didn’t start in
life as a secondhand bird and dog fancier’s errand-boy in the
Seven Dials, that’s all ? ”
You needn’t wait for his answer, as, presuming you are well up in
your subject, you can go on pleasantly, and with an air of tender
interest to ask him, “ Do you ever see Did Bill Broker the rag-and-
i bone man, who was just round the corner by your shop ? ” And then
! you can express your curiosity as to what became of Old Bill’s pretty
| daughter, “ on whom ”—here you can throw a wink at the company
—“ you were rather sweet, Sir Thomas, in those days,—boy-like,
for she was seventeen, at least, and you couldn’t have been more
than twelve.”
This is only a single illustration of the rule, which you can develope
to its utmost extent in ordinary everyday practice. You will get
yourself immensely liked, and universally respected, and no dinner-
party or social gathering of any kind will be considered perfect
without your presence. Human nature is the same everywhere,
and you must adapt pour self to your company, not by a servile imi-
tation of their style, which in them is possibly an affectation, but by
judiciously introducing ichatever element is the most opposite to their
habits and demeanour.
Conversational Contrasts.—If you find yourself in a society
where everyone is lively, you must introduce the element of severe
gravity. Has Nature made everything green or sky-blue ? No.
Nature abhors a monotone, and, therefore, you will be but acting on
a natural principle, which the artificiality of Society has obscured,
when you introduce, as I have said, the element of severe melancholy
gravity into a lively and merry party.
Rule.—Be rollicking with the dismal, sprightly with the dull,
: wild with the sedate, uproarious with the quiet, inharmonious witn
the musical, seriously scientific with the frivolous, slow with the
fast, fast among the slow, an Agnostic with Theists, a Theist with
Agnostics, stupid with the talented, and talented with the stupid.
Example No. 1.—Suppose yourself at a lively party of wits, or
wags, where each man has his good story to tell, his joke to make, and
his quip to utter, and where all are ready to laugh on the slightest
provocation. It will he for you to adjust the balance. Do not hesitate
as to the course you are called upon, in the true interests of Society,
to pursue. Take your place at the table, and when the first jest has
set the table in a roar, do you preserve a decorous silence. Then,
when the laughter is finished, request to know what had so greatly
amused the company. The jest is sure to be imperfectly repeated by
the host, wTbo will be at once corrected by one of the guests, who, in
his turn, will be corrected by the perpetrator of the jest himself, and
by the time it has been accurately repeated to you, you will have
had the satisfaction of observing that the original concocter of the
joke is disgusted at the evident inability of those who had pretended
so much enjoyment from it to repeat it correctly, or even a part of it.
On its repetition to you, no one will have laughed a second time,
which in itself is sufficient proof that it was not worthy of their
approval on its first utterance. You will not move a muscle, but
will simply and sadly bow your head, with such an air of sad resig-
nation as would characterise your manner had you received the
confirmation of some melancholy news for which you were not
entirely unprepared.
Thus, you will have judiciously introduced the element of serious-
ness into a party where the evening would have been frittered away
in thoughtless, careless witticisms, and in the telling of useless tales,
and would have lasted, but for your well-timed action, until the
small hours of the' morning. In view of this possibility, take the
greatest care to be the last to leave, having, on your arrival, bestowed
your hat and coat in some safe place where you can find them, but
where nobody else can.
[This interesting subject, with rales, exceptions, and examples, 'will be
resumed next week, and continued until further notice.]
Yote Straight.—-Yes ; but be always careful to take a right aim.