Punch (98.1890)

May 3, 1890.]

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

213

COURT NAPPING.

Mas. "Wood can't expect to be always the lucky possessor of a Bandy
Dick, nor can Mr. Pineeo hope always to be up to that really good
farcical standard. The good Pinebo has nodded over this. _ The

Cabinet Minister is an
excellent title thrown
away. The Cabinet
Minister himself, Mr.
Aethub Cecil, in his
official costume, play-
ing the flute, is as
burlesque as the Gene-
ral in full uniform, in
Mr. Gilbeet's " Wed-
ding March" sitting
with his feet in hot-
water. The married
boy and girl, with their
doll baby and irritat-
ingly unreal quarrels,
reminded me of the
boy-and-girl lovers in
Brantingham Hall.
The mother of The
Macphail—the wooden
Scotch figure (repre-

T0P«- Boo,™. -nu ***J™_«

a Helen-Macgregorish bore, curiously suggestive of what Mr.
Righton might look like in petticoats. Mrs. John "Wood's part is
a very trying one, and not what the public expect from her.

Though the pieoe begins fairly well, yet it is dull until Mr.
Weedon Gbossmtth, as Joseph Lebanon, comes on the scene in
the Second Act, when everyone begins to be amused, and ends
by being disappointed. Joseph remains the hero of the situation,
and, cad as he is, the behaviour of the ladies and gentlemen towards
him reduces them to his level, so that, in spite of its being a farce,
we begin to pity him as we pity Mr. Guthrie's Pariah, and
as those who remember Theodose Hook's novel have pitied that
wretched little cad, Jack Brag. The part is not equal to Aunt
Jack's Solicitor, and had Mr. Gbosssiith, by the kind permission of
Mr. Pineko, departed from_ the conventional Adelphi and Drury
Lane type of comic Hebraic money-lender, he would have done
better. The piece is played with the burlesque earnestness that
characterised the first performances of Engaged at the Haymarket,
which piece the Scotch accent recalls to the playgoer's memory. No
one can possibly feel any interest m the lovers.

As a rule Mr. Pineeo's stage-management is simple and effective:
but here the design is confused and the result is an appearance of
restless uncertainty. Drumdurris Castle seems to be a lunatic
asylum, of which the principal inmates are two elderly female
patients, one, like a twopence-coloured plate of some ancient Scotch
heroine, with a craze about Scotland, and the other mad on saying
"Fal-lal," and screaming out something about "motives." If eight
of the characters were cut out, " they'd none of 'em be missed," and if
the play were compressed into one Act, it would contain the essence of
all that was worth retaining, and, with a few songs and dances, might
make an attractive lever de rideau or "laughable farce to finish,"
before, or after, a revival of Dandy Dick. Amicus Candidus.

MR. PUNCH'S PROVERBS UP TO DATE.
An acre of land in Melbourne is better than two miles in the bush.
Not enough at the Aquarium pays better than a feast.
You may start a tram punctually from the terminus, but you can't
get it to keep its time en route.
You can't make an English purse out of an Irish Land Bill.
A Tea Duty will annoy for ever.

It is the early Tram-man who holds the morning meeting.

Look after the wire-fences for the horses and the hounds will take
care of themselves.

A man may go nine times to Holioway for contempt, and after the
tenth visit come before the Official Receiver and be broke.

A School Board is soon parted from its money.

Give a dog a muzzle and you needn't chain him.

" Nothing when you 'be Roose'd to It."—"We've heard plenty
about diner d la Boose, and the Here and There and Everywhere
and Fare of London Life, but now we are to have Fasting d la
Boose. Vide article in May number of New Beview on Easting,
by Dr. Robinson Ckusoe,—beg pardon,—should have said Dr.
Eobson Roose 0. Article not variation on Roose O'b Dream, but
thoroughly practical.

WEEK BY WEEK.

Wednesday, April 30— Mr. Punch rises early and appears every-
where. "Whole holiday. General rejoicings. Grand Banquet m tne
evening as usual. Private Reception of Mr. Stanley, I presume.
No one admitted without orders—on his uniform. Great reception oi
Mr. H. M. Stanley by bis Hairdresser.

Thursday, May 1.—Headaches. Chimney Sweeper s Day. b°ot-
able occasion for Sweeping Reform Meetings everywhere. N.B.
Edinburgh Exhibition. Scots wha' hae. Reception of Mr. H. M.
Stanley by the eminent Explorer's tailor, bootmaker, and hosier.

Friday, May 2.—Strictly Private View of the Pictures at Bur-
lington House. Admissions limited to not more than 100,000 patrons
of Art. Quiet day. Everybody preparing speech for the Academy
Banquet to-morrow. Deputation to Mr. H. M. Stanley from
Aquarium, to ask if he will take Succi's place.

Saturday— Great Cooking Match at the Cafe Royal, Lunch Time,
Trial Steaks. Opening of the front door by Mr. H. M. Stanley.
Snug little dinner at Burlington House. Sir Feedebick, P.R.A., in
the chair. Musical entertainment by Mr. Whistleb. Eire works
by Mr. H-bby F-bn-ss.

Sunday.—Dies Non. No Day! ! Curious effect. Gas lighted
everywhere. Private Banquet to Mr. Stanley, who discovers the
sauce of the lobster, and takes it with his salmon. Rejoicings.

Monday.—Ceremony of changing sentinels at Buckingham Palace.
Every sentinel very much changed after the operation. Opening of
a New Book by Mr. H. M. Stanley. Mrs. Snooks's first dance, if
she has learnt it in time for to-night.

Tuesday— Preparations for to-morrow. The Platelayers' annual
festival, Robeet, the "Waiter, in the'chair. Reception by Mr. H. M.
Stanley, of a parcel from his tailor's. Usual banquets, dances,
races, excursions, alarums.

Wednesday.—Mr. Punch comes out stronger than ever. Con-
gratulatory telegrams from all parts of Europe. Banquet as usual.

THE OPERA-GOER'S DIARY.

Tuesday, April 22.—Mr. Bennett's Libretto of Thorgrim good
from literary point of view; poor from dramatic ditto. Composer
Cowen not possessing dramatic power sufficient for two, cannot
supply the want. Sestett
and Chorus, end of Act II.,
skilfully worked up, and
received with acclamation.
Opera, in a general way,
Wagnerish. Orchestration
shows the hand of a master,
Master Cowen. Local
colour good, but too much
local colour spoils the Opera.
Mr. McGucein is Thorgrim
to the life; singing, acting,
and make - up admirable.
Miss Zelie de Lussan
highly commendable. Mis3
Teemelli, mother of Helgi
(an ugly name and scarcely
mentionable to ears polite),
loud and leading as a lady- ,
villain. Helgi and Amora
are first cousins (not once
removed) to Telrammond

the Tedious and Ortrude
the Orful. Mr. Celli as ^
King, a sort of Scandina-
vian Beau Bbummel, im-
parts light comedy touch to Th„ SratidinnTna,, r__

Opera, which, but for this, The Composer,

might have been a trifle dull. Cowen called, came, congratulated.
H.R.H. Prince of "Wales, setting the best example, as he always
does, to Opera-goers, came at the beginning and remained to the end.

April 23.—Maritana delighted everyone. Miss Geobgina Bubns
splendid. Mr. John Child, as Ccesar, good child. Mr. Leslie
Ceotty good for Jose.

April 26.—Lohengrin. King played by Pope with considerable
amount of temporal power. F. Davies good as The Herald, but
which Herald he is, whether the "Family" or "New York," not
quite clear. Incidental music by amateurs in the Gallery, who, in
lengthy interval between Second and Third Scenes of Last Act,
whistled " We won't go home till morning! "

Carl Rosa Opera season soon over, then Drama at Drury Lane, and
Italian Opera at Covent Garden. Augustus Dbubiolanus Opeba-
ticus Counticouncillabius (Sheriff in posse, Alderman infuturo, and
Lord Mayor in futurissimo) keeps the ball a rolling at both Houses.