Punch (55.1868)

July 18, 1868.]

PUNCH, OK THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

31

"PM

HONOUR WHERE HONOUR IS DUE.

Seusan (with reverence). “ Lauk a Daisy me, Hann ! o'oze that ?”

Hann {with awe). “Miss Jemima Larkyns—Old Chumley’s Cook, next Dook !'

WAS THEODORE DECEIVED ?

The papers have been asking this question, the Pall Mall Gazette
leading the way.

Mr. Punch would reply, not a doubt of it.

Eor example: he thought England would put up with the imprison-
ment of her consul and the outrage of her envoy, rather than pay five
millions to punish him and set them free. But she wouldn’t.

He thought no English force could march from Zoulla to Magdala.
But it did.

He thought his prison fortress impregnable. But it wasn’t.

He thought his own big guns would smash the little English moun-
tain batteries. But they couldn’t.

He thought the rocket^ brigade at Arrogie was a train of baggage-
mules, and the Bunjaub Pioneers a rout of camp-followers. But they
weren’t.

He thought Sib, Robert Napier would walk off thankfully with
cows and captives, and leave him in quiet possession of his chiefs, his
crown, his mortars, and his Magdala. But he wouldn’t.

Yes, Theodore was deceived at all points—not a doubt about it.

And “ sarved him right,” says Mr. Punch.

OUR LAW REPORT.

An action was recently brought by a tenant of one house against
I his neighbour for annoying him by constantly playing onjiis pianos

Excepting Exceptions.

Brown stopping on the scorching flags of Regent Street to moralise,
observed, “ There’s nothing new under the Sun ! ”

“ Except boots,” exclaimed Iris limping friend, who was suffering
agonies.

such tunes as “ Champagne Charley.” “ Not for Joseph f “ Paddle your
own Canoe f and so forth. Abatement of 4 nisance was promised, but
let us sincerely hope that harmony will not be restored.

Risky Allah's Latest Case.—Both Sergeant Parry on the one part,
and Sergeant Ballantine on the other, omitted to quote the well-
known lines evidently applicable here,

“ * * My Lord,

Who steals my purse steals trash: ’tis something, nothing.’’

Eor the rest consult your memory, or the nearest Shakspeare.

Free Translation for Financiers.

(.Suggested by Sir Morton Peto’s Whitewashing.)

ILanc veniam petimus damusque vicessim.”

We are all Petos more or less; so don’t let’s be hard on him.”

nothing = 0.

Considering what their flying projects come to, no wonder the
Peter Wilkinses who have lately been exhibiting at the Crystal Palace
call themselves “ Aero-noughts.”

JAPANESE OUTDONE.

Juggling Extraordinary in Society. Eeat as performed in Belgrave
Square. Keeping up a Ball from eleven p.m. till five in the mornmg.

Man who has a Turn eor Music.—An Organ-Grinder,

CAUTION.

Ladies who wear long dresses, and dislike their being trampled on,

should wear upon their backs a card with the inscription, “No

Eollowers Allowed ! ”

—

A Man in Advance of his Time.—One who has been knocked into
the middle of next week.