Punch: Punch (70.1876)

Mat 20, 1876.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 199

NOT BAD JUDGMENT EITHER.

Mr. Snobbinglon Eardcash (offering Us Hand and Heart to his fair Companion). " No, now w-w-weally, Miss Mawy, don't be
surpwised. Ton my w-w-word I mean it!—I do, indeed!"

Miss May (a sad puss). " No, really, Mr. Hardcash, I couldn't think of Accepting so much. I wouldn't mind just

having your mare, simply for friendship's sake, you know ! "

poor exiles of Erin"—Murphy, O'Gorman, Callan, and M.
Brooks—arrayed in a quintette against the Resolution in the teeth
of a strange consensus of Irish Members in its favour.

Mr. Bright and Gladstone brought up their 81-ton guns in sup-
port of the Irish Brigade, and, thanks to their aid, the Government,
resisting the Resolution, was defeated by 224 to 167 ! First blood
for the Home-Rulers ! Mr. Punch distrusts even sobriety on com-
pulsion. Is it due to public conviction, or priestly influence, that
so good a case has been got up for contending that opinion in Ireland
is in favour of shutting up the whiskey-shops one day in seven? The
Major was absolutely pathetic on the unalienable right of every man
"to drink'as much as he can carry." That right, dear Major, im-
plies its correlative duty—" to carry as much as you can drink."
Tis few can drink or carry as much good liquor as the Major, or
what a prospect would the enforcement of this right open to the
Irish distillers!

The Prince of Wales's Feathers.

To Mr, Punch.

Most Illustrious Sir,

At a time when changes are taking place in the Insignia of
Royalty, might not an additional feather be voted to His Royal
Highness the Prince of "Waxes, viz., one to be worn in his cap, in
celebration of His Royal Highness's plucky and truly Royal progress
in India ? Yours, with great regard,

Nom de Plume.

The Feathers Tavern, May 12, 1876.

P.S.—" Facile Princess " might be added as a motto.

turkey and greece.

It is whispered on the Stock Exchange that the Turkish Divi-
dends will henceforward be paid on the Greek Calends.

MAY A LA MODE.

A Remonstrance from a Frozen-out Muse.

0 month once so famous in song and in story
For sunshine, and sweetness, and song-birds, and flowers,

Must we rededicate you to Cock'rell or Cory r
Do you think that a muse who still shiv'ringly cowers

Above a coal fire, while the May-buds are bursting,
Is like to invoke you in jubilant ode ?

What city, great poet, would ever go thirsting
For May d la Mode ?

Bedight with green leaves ? Nay, an Ulster were fitter,
Poor half-frozen nymph, those blue limbs to enwrap ;

For never North-Easter more biting and bitter
Attended December, that chilly old chap.

No rose that now blows is so red as your nose is,
You can't smell your buds, you've so awfud a Code !

You've suffered some hideous metempsychosis,
Poor May d la Mode !

Say, have you been flirting with March, or coquetting
With saucy Jack Frost just a trifle too long r

The kisses of Phoebus are cold. Is he getting
A little bit jealous ? Come ! Tip us a song,

Like the song of old days! It may soften Apollo ;

Send sunbeams and blossoms ; North-Easters be blowed !

For of all weather sells there is no sell so hollow
As May d la Mode !

an ecclesiastical article.

During the sittings of Convocation, the Lower House ever and
anon sends up to the Upper House an articulus cleri. Of course
this is no addition to the Thirty-Nine Articles ; and they are to be
held anathema who suggest that it is any article pertaining to an
Articled Clerk.