Punch: Punch (100.1891)

254

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHAEIVAEL

[Mat 30, 1891.

WHY SHOULD LONDON WAIT ?

Ob, The Slighted Meteopolis and the Disappointed Medical Student.

[Sir Eichaed Quain (seconding the proposal of Lord Herschell " that the draft Supplemental Charter for the
University of London he approved") said that with respect to Medical Degrees, those who were not iu the profession
could not realise the grievance which the Medical Students of London felt themselves to be sustaining by not being
able to obtain their Degrees in the Metropolis. Hundreds of capable men were driven to seek in Scotland, at
Newcastle, and elsewhere the Medical Degrees which they ought to have obtained in London.]

Air—" The University of Gottingcn." London, loquitur ,

i.

Whene'er with longing eyes you
view

Degrees, I feel I'm widone, Sir,
And so do the companions true
Who Btudied with you at the U-
-niversity of London, Sir—
-niversity of London, Sir!

[ Weeps, and pulls out report of
stormy meeting of Convocation
of University of London, where

new draft charter[of which Lord
Hebschell and Lord Justice
FfiY were the most prominent
advocates) was rejected by 461
votes against 197).

h.

Report!; It saddens me—and you.

Was it in cruel fun done, Sir I
What q,rjAiN and Hebschell said
was true!

Durham can crow it o'er the U-
-niversity of London, Sir I1
-niversity of London, Sir !

[At the repetition of this line
young—but degreeless—Medical
Student groans in cadence.

in.

Degrees! L cannot grant them—
true!

Or it were with a run done, Sir.

I'm only the Metropolis. Pooh !
Provincial pedants flout the U-

-niversity of London, Sir!

-niversity of London, Sir !

iv.

Talk of Home Rule? It's all
askew I

I have it not, for one done, Sir.
I've taught you; your " trade-
mark"—boohoo!—
I cannot give you at the U-
- niversity of London, Sir!
-niversity of London, Sir!

v.

To knowledge in my halls you
grew;

But now you are—dear son,
done, Sir!
You 're only a mere Medical Stu-
-dent at the sorely slighted U-
-niversity of London, Sir,
-niversity of London, Sir!

vi.

Off—to Newcastle, boy ! Adieu !
By that big vote we 're undone,
Sir.

Provincial Colleges have exclu-
sive lights denied to the poor U-

-niversity of London, Sir ?

-niversity of London, Sir I

[During the last stanza, M. S.
beats his breast with his stetho-
scope and goes off—like coals—
to Newcastle, or like mustard—
to Durham—to waste valuable
time in getting in those colossal
provincial centres what " Poor
Little London" cannot grant
him.

BREAKFAST TABLE-TALK.

{From Edison s Phrasc-Book.)

Good gracious! what was that
horrible noise f It sounded like
the falling of a leg of mutton !

Oh! that was only the blow
delivered by the Hackney Cock-
chafer on the eye of the Midland
Wrap-Rascal. It's the best fight
I've seen for a long time.

I wish, then, you would take
it with you into another room.
I can scarcely catch a single word
of the Rev. Jabez Fishe's de-
lightful sermon, to which I am
endeavouring to listen.

Heavens! why all the windows
are broken ! And the mirrors are
shattered! And the chandelier
has come down!

Well, my dear, I am very sorry,
but I was much interested in the
firing of this new 137-ton gun,
and they have iust let it off.
That's all.

Geographical.

" Low-lying " districts are
much talked about just now as
breeding-grounds for the pes-
tiferous Influenza microbe. The
worst " low - lying " districts
Punch knows are the editorial
offices of certain scurrilous jour-
nals, and the social pestilences
they engender and disseminate
sorely need abatement. Perhaps
when they have duly fumigated
the House, they will turn their
attention to the Office.