DOI Heft:
April 12, 1856
DOI Seite / Zitierlink: https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16617#0149
April 12, 1856.]
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
141
A VOICE FROM THE CHURN.
onceit—or self-complacency
aside, Mr. Punch is—or,
were he a weaker individual,
would be—overwhelmed with
the grateful acknowledg-
ments showered upon him
by Housewives, Careful Ma-
nagers, and Heads of Fami-
lies generally, for the various
economic suggestions by
which he assists them to
defeat the cupidity and dis-
honesty of trade, to make
both ends meet, and to en-
able them to face the tax-
gatherer with an unshrinking
eye. His advice on the great
Sugar question, when the
price was abominably and
unfairly raised, was taken by
thousands, it appears; and
he simple course he recom-
mended—one day's absti-
nence in the week—impressed
greedy grocers with the con-
viction that "the public"
could "help itself" (which
they had denied) by not
helping itself out of the
sugar-basin. Down came
Sugar.
He is now implored by a
legion of Mothers and other
Managers, to do for another
luxury what he did for
Sugar. He is entreated to
be down upon the Butterman,
whose prices just, now are
extortionate.
What shall he say about
Butter ? It was an article
known to the ancients.
Pliny mentions it. The Romans used it as a medicine, and probably, when they had colds, anointed
their Roman noses therewith. The Egyptian Christians used it: for lamp-oil, and Cleofatka may have
greased her needle with it, to enable her to work the faster. Its Latin name is Butyrum, derived from
two Greek words which it would be a bother to print, but which imply cow and coagulation. It is
alluded to in the Hebrew records, as having been brought up to Sisera in "a lordly dish." In
1675 there was, it is said, a shower of it; but this was in Ireland, and the butter-rain was very yellow.
Such are some of the historical asso-
ciations prompted by the name. Other
interesting facts encircle the butter-
tub. Butter-fingers is a term of
reproach, especially at cricket; pars-
nips are not supposed to be buttered
by elegance of language ; and it is as
proverbially difficult as apparently un-
desirable to recover the article from
the throat of a black dog. The tact
which prevents one from losing advan-
tages in one's possession, is symbolised
by acquaintance with the side of the
bread on which this substance is found.
But all these reminiscences have no-
thing whatever to do with the matter
in hand; and this, indeed, is Mr.
Punch's chief reason for inserting
them, after the manner of other
essayists.
Butter is dear, is it ? Well, ladies,
you will soon have it cheaper, if you
can compel or induce your households
to do as was done in the Sugar case.
Abstain from the article one day in
the week. Any day will do, only stick
to it. Take Friday, the day named
after Frigga (the Venus of the
North), to whom Butter was offered
in sacrifice. Eat no Butter on Friday.
There is a lot of substitutes; one of
our lady correspondents suggests
" cold boiled bacon, pork, or salt-
fish." We are not violating a State
secret in disclosing, that at the private
table of Royalty, Treacle is no un-
welcome guest. We prefer Marma-
lade, with the turnips left out. But
anyhow here is the remedy for the
Butter grievance. Forward! The
Butterfly was a Gentleman, but the
Butterman is—the other thing. Why
submit ? You have conquered before.
New victories await you. Let Butter
go dowD, as sugar did, and bread
will ; and then an exulting natiou
shall triumphantly enjoy Sugared
Bread-and-Butter. Let us all sail in
the same Butter-Boat, and stand no
sauce.
A PILL FOR PARLIAMENT.
The Medical Bill seems to be such a very disagreeable dose that
the House of Commons cannot swallow it; and, byway of throwing
physic to the dogs, they have pitched the measure to a Select Com-
mittee, where the bone of contention will be picked to pieces, and there
will be an end of it. The alleged intention of the measure is to put
down quacks; but, even if the Bill were to limit the profession to what
are called legally-qualified practitioners, there would still be an abund-
ance of quackery. _ We can see no difference between the vendor of a
patent pill for curing every disease, and the family doctor, who con-
tinues to send medicine which he knows will do no good, for the mere
purpose of running up a bill, in which' " Mixture—Master John,"
shall be repeated some twenty or thirty times, at three shillings a
bottle; and "Pill and Draught—Miss "Eliza," shall run through a
page-and-a-half of foolscap, at eighteenpence per item. There is surely
a large amount Gf quackery about the learned practitioners—so abun-
dant in the suburbs of Lradon—who are always powdering and pilling
the families into which they gain admission; who address childish in-
quiries to the baby as to its little "tonguey pungy ;" and promise to
send the unhappy infant some "nicey picey," for wnich they intend to
" chargey pargey," to a tremendous " summy pummy."
We are quite sure that legislation would be as well employed in guard-
ing against the more specious quacks, who get into one's house under the
guise of regularly-qualified medical men, as in attempting to protect
those simpletons who will go on swallowing cures for every disease,
and rubbing in ointment by the half-hundred weight on the faith of
some miraculous restoration of some mythic leg of some imaginary
Guardsman. Everybody knows, that in the medical, as in every other
profession, he is always called a quack who makes the first bold step
out of the ruts of routine; and the most rapid advances in any science
are due to the men, who, in their own days, were always denominated
quacks by those who were being left in the background. We would
support any measure of medical reform which should really be calcu-
lated to put down quackery; but, in trying to first "catch your
quack," it is as reasonable to look for him in the ranks of the regularly-
qualified practitioners, as among the advertisers in the Newspapers.
Examinations are very proper things to regulate admission to the
medical profession; but such precautions will not guard against
quacks; who become so, not on account of what they know, or what
they do not know, but on account of their pretending to knowledge
they do not possess, or making an improper use of such knowledge as
they can really boast of.
THE EAGLE QUILL.
The eagle pen that signed the treaty of peace was—as certified by
M. Feuillet de Conches, an official, "pulled from the Imperial eagle
of the Jardin des Plantes." Mr. Punch, in the name of humanity, has
to ask—was chloroform first administered ? It is said that the Empress
Eugenie has claimed the quill as a precious souvenir of peace. Her
Majesty may not be aware of the fact, duly certified, if we remember
rightly, by Pliny, that even as the eagle preys upon other birds, so do
the feathers of the eagle eat up, on contact, all other feathers. Mr.
Punch, in pure admiration of the gentle and beautiful Empress, makes
known this truth, in order that she may keep the devouring eagle
feather safe apart from her marabouts, her ostriches, and birds of
paradise.__
The Force of Adulteration.—One of our most fashionable bakers,
upon being shown a specimen of the Bread Tree, rejected it with scorn,
saying contemptuously, "Call that Bread? Psha! Whv, there's no
| Alum in it!"
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
141
A VOICE FROM THE CHURN.
onceit—or self-complacency
aside, Mr. Punch is—or,
were he a weaker individual,
would be—overwhelmed with
the grateful acknowledg-
ments showered upon him
by Housewives, Careful Ma-
nagers, and Heads of Fami-
lies generally, for the various
economic suggestions by
which he assists them to
defeat the cupidity and dis-
honesty of trade, to make
both ends meet, and to en-
able them to face the tax-
gatherer with an unshrinking
eye. His advice on the great
Sugar question, when the
price was abominably and
unfairly raised, was taken by
thousands, it appears; and
he simple course he recom-
mended—one day's absti-
nence in the week—impressed
greedy grocers with the con-
viction that "the public"
could "help itself" (which
they had denied) by not
helping itself out of the
sugar-basin. Down came
Sugar.
He is now implored by a
legion of Mothers and other
Managers, to do for another
luxury what he did for
Sugar. He is entreated to
be down upon the Butterman,
whose prices just, now are
extortionate.
What shall he say about
Butter ? It was an article
known to the ancients.
Pliny mentions it. The Romans used it as a medicine, and probably, when they had colds, anointed
their Roman noses therewith. The Egyptian Christians used it: for lamp-oil, and Cleofatka may have
greased her needle with it, to enable her to work the faster. Its Latin name is Butyrum, derived from
two Greek words which it would be a bother to print, but which imply cow and coagulation. It is
alluded to in the Hebrew records, as having been brought up to Sisera in "a lordly dish." In
1675 there was, it is said, a shower of it; but this was in Ireland, and the butter-rain was very yellow.
Such are some of the historical asso-
ciations prompted by the name. Other
interesting facts encircle the butter-
tub. Butter-fingers is a term of
reproach, especially at cricket; pars-
nips are not supposed to be buttered
by elegance of language ; and it is as
proverbially difficult as apparently un-
desirable to recover the article from
the throat of a black dog. The tact
which prevents one from losing advan-
tages in one's possession, is symbolised
by acquaintance with the side of the
bread on which this substance is found.
But all these reminiscences have no-
thing whatever to do with the matter
in hand; and this, indeed, is Mr.
Punch's chief reason for inserting
them, after the manner of other
essayists.
Butter is dear, is it ? Well, ladies,
you will soon have it cheaper, if you
can compel or induce your households
to do as was done in the Sugar case.
Abstain from the article one day in
the week. Any day will do, only stick
to it. Take Friday, the day named
after Frigga (the Venus of the
North), to whom Butter was offered
in sacrifice. Eat no Butter on Friday.
There is a lot of substitutes; one of
our lady correspondents suggests
" cold boiled bacon, pork, or salt-
fish." We are not violating a State
secret in disclosing, that at the private
table of Royalty, Treacle is no un-
welcome guest. We prefer Marma-
lade, with the turnips left out. But
anyhow here is the remedy for the
Butter grievance. Forward! The
Butterfly was a Gentleman, but the
Butterman is—the other thing. Why
submit ? You have conquered before.
New victories await you. Let Butter
go dowD, as sugar did, and bread
will ; and then an exulting natiou
shall triumphantly enjoy Sugared
Bread-and-Butter. Let us all sail in
the same Butter-Boat, and stand no
sauce.
A PILL FOR PARLIAMENT.
The Medical Bill seems to be such a very disagreeable dose that
the House of Commons cannot swallow it; and, byway of throwing
physic to the dogs, they have pitched the measure to a Select Com-
mittee, where the bone of contention will be picked to pieces, and there
will be an end of it. The alleged intention of the measure is to put
down quacks; but, even if the Bill were to limit the profession to what
are called legally-qualified practitioners, there would still be an abund-
ance of quackery. _ We can see no difference between the vendor of a
patent pill for curing every disease, and the family doctor, who con-
tinues to send medicine which he knows will do no good, for the mere
purpose of running up a bill, in which' " Mixture—Master John,"
shall be repeated some twenty or thirty times, at three shillings a
bottle; and "Pill and Draught—Miss "Eliza," shall run through a
page-and-a-half of foolscap, at eighteenpence per item. There is surely
a large amount Gf quackery about the learned practitioners—so abun-
dant in the suburbs of Lradon—who are always powdering and pilling
the families into which they gain admission; who address childish in-
quiries to the baby as to its little "tonguey pungy ;" and promise to
send the unhappy infant some "nicey picey," for wnich they intend to
" chargey pargey," to a tremendous " summy pummy."
We are quite sure that legislation would be as well employed in guard-
ing against the more specious quacks, who get into one's house under the
guise of regularly-qualified medical men, as in attempting to protect
those simpletons who will go on swallowing cures for every disease,
and rubbing in ointment by the half-hundred weight on the faith of
some miraculous restoration of some mythic leg of some imaginary
Guardsman. Everybody knows, that in the medical, as in every other
profession, he is always called a quack who makes the first bold step
out of the ruts of routine; and the most rapid advances in any science
are due to the men, who, in their own days, were always denominated
quacks by those who were being left in the background. We would
support any measure of medical reform which should really be calcu-
lated to put down quackery; but, in trying to first "catch your
quack," it is as reasonable to look for him in the ranks of the regularly-
qualified practitioners, as among the advertisers in the Newspapers.
Examinations are very proper things to regulate admission to the
medical profession; but such precautions will not guard against
quacks; who become so, not on account of what they know, or what
they do not know, but on account of their pretending to knowledge
they do not possess, or making an improper use of such knowledge as
they can really boast of.
THE EAGLE QUILL.
The eagle pen that signed the treaty of peace was—as certified by
M. Feuillet de Conches, an official, "pulled from the Imperial eagle
of the Jardin des Plantes." Mr. Punch, in the name of humanity, has
to ask—was chloroform first administered ? It is said that the Empress
Eugenie has claimed the quill as a precious souvenir of peace. Her
Majesty may not be aware of the fact, duly certified, if we remember
rightly, by Pliny, that even as the eagle preys upon other birds, so do
the feathers of the eagle eat up, on contact, all other feathers. Mr.
Punch, in pure admiration of the gentle and beautiful Empress, makes
known this truth, in order that she may keep the devouring eagle
feather safe apart from her marabouts, her ostriches, and birds of
paradise.__
The Force of Adulteration.—One of our most fashionable bakers,
upon being shown a specimen of the Bread Tree, rejected it with scorn,
saying contemptuously, "Call that Bread? Psha! Whv, there's no
| Alum in it!"