December 20, lo£)b.j
241
MARY ANN'S NOTIONS.
ear Mr. Punch, — " You
to say about men in general,
because I want to tell you
something about, one man in
particular. Sue1! a triumph!
twice, but was put down in the moat awful manner, and with a regular
House of Commons speech. ' Sentiments, Sir, unworthy alike of the
education which it has been your good fortune to receive, and of the
society amid which you are so advantageously placed.'4 But though
Gussy was silenced, he was not convinced, and about a month &go he
was giving us Mr. Martikgale's ideas about being married. I wish I
had written them down at the timp, but I think I can remember enough
to make you see what kind of a Yourjg Englander Mr. Kersey is,
" 'Kersey's governor wants him to be married,' said Augustus, as
if he were recounting some grievous wrong to his friend. ' Ni>w I know
as a sand-boy.8 I so everywhere; see no end of life ; stop at people's
houses in the country; get my hunting and shooting and all that, and
am bothered with no keeping up appearances. Here ate my three
rooms, and there's my setvant, and who wants anything moreP I'm
must kindly let me interrupt hanged if I do. And the governor won't let me be contented and
myself in what I was going | baopy.'
" ' Stem and cruel parient,' said I.9
" ' O, of course,' retorted Mr. Gussy, 'you are on the other side.
Never mind, it's natural in you. Well, I could say nothing in reply,'
he went on, 'except that it was for fncu to corsider whether he hadn't
Such fun! best stand well with his governor, who bad behaved well to him, and
"This Mr. Martingale i all that, and that I supposed the old gentleman would do something
—Cuhzon Martingale is , handsome, if his views were met.'
his name, and his friends ; "'You gave a son good advice, my dear,' said Mamma, ' though you
call him Kersey (what i pretend to say that 3 ou spoke heartlessly. I know you, dear.'
affectation that is in men! " Guss actually coloured, having no notion of being thought good
giving or.e another little pet; against his wdi.10 However, be went on.
names, like school-girls,1 j "' I said what I tell you ' But,' said Kersey, ' what does meeting
when you know all the time S his views mean? That I'm to give up my fieedom, which is thfl one
that they2 wouldn't, walk ' thing of all that I enjoy ; that I am to take one house and live in it, »iid
across the street to help receive proper people there, and go to their houses, whether I like 'em
their beloved friends) was a or not, and g'ow. stuck up, and cut the pleasantest folks I know,
great ally of my brother because they are not exactly society for steady persons, and escort my
Augustus. Gussy (yes, but! wife about, and go nowhere unless she can go (fancy that!), and never
a sister's different3) u»ed to! start off out of town any more, with no fuss and peoaration, ayid
believe in Kersey, and dress ' wander about as I please, and come back in a month, 0- two, or six.
and nobody to control me, or ask me to account for myself—'
" ' Actually pathetic,' I said, laughing out; for I declare that
Gussy had got into quite a whining tone, as he was describing the
dreadful slavery with whicb. his friend was threatened. 'Isn't it
Solomon's Proverbs. He I terrible, Mamma?'
tried with Papa once orj "' A ff-w months of married life would cure Mr. Martingale of
those wild ideas,' said Mamma.
" ' That's what I told the fellah,' cried Gussy, ' and thit made him
ever so much wilder. ' He wasn't going to be cured of liking liberty,
and what right had anybody to cure him?'
" ' Misl, Lindley, of whose feelings in the mutter nobody speaks, is
to be congratulated, I think,' said Mamma, ' on not being ma.de the
victim of an experiment.'
" ' O, hang it,' salt Mr. Augustus, ' it would be a precious good
mafch for her. Kersey would have a capital allowance now, and the
bulk of the Lincolnshire estates after his father. And a very g od-
like him, and adopt his
opinions, such as they were,
and retail them to Mamma
and me as if they were
the young lady old Mr. Martingale was thinking of, and she is a 1 looking fellah, too, and good-tempered, if nobody crosses him. Any
very nice, sweet-tempered girl, not exactly pretty,6 but very pleasing,
and really accomplished. She is a cousin of Kersey's, and they Lave
known one another from children.'
"' And quite time he should, my dear,' said Mamma. This was one
for Mr. Gussy.6 who is older than Mr. Martingale.
" ' Well, he don't see it in that light,' said Gussy.
know in what light Mr. Martingale sees marriage
how, hhe ought to jump at it.'
" And the magnificent Mr. Guss went off to smoke his Weed,11 and
to meditate upon his friend's noble attachment to liberty.
" My dear Mr. Punch, Kxrsey Martingale has gone and run away
with a girl who sings at concerts, (quite a proper person, I believe,
who earns a good deal of money,) and has married her, aud his father
refuses to see him, and has cut down his allowance to one quarter of
" Your affectionate,
" Mary Ann."
8 Did he explain why a sand-boy should be jolly 1
9 More shame for you, to quote a low and stupid song.
*o You do not imitate your dear Mamma's charitv, Mif s M. A.
11 You seem afraid of the word. There is no objection to it, dear. Tobacco was
a Virginian weed, until cultivated.
12 You had better have been listening to Meyerbekb than to gossip.
13 No personal appeals to us. We remark, but do not reply.
persisted Mamma, 'but I think he is standing in his own light, in I what it was, and Mr. Curzon will have to live in apartments in the
objecting to it.' And my dear Mamma looked quite pleased with her- j New Hoad, and attend his wife—yes, Wife, (spell it with a big letter,
self and her neat little speech, which even Mr. Augustus condescended [ it looks like digging it into him) to all her concerts, and hold her
to nod at, as not bad. If one of his fast companions had said it, he ' shawl, and carry her music home, and eaten Mm going into the country
would have roared, and gone about repeating it everywhere.7 j without her leave. She has a will of her own, they tell me, as she ought
"' It is Jane Lindley, of course,' i said. to have, being the hf ad of the family aud its support.
"'I 'hleeve so,' said Guss, ' but 1 didn't ask. The principle's the j " Gussy would not tell this. He whs ashamed fo. But I heard it
same, whoever it is. Kersey respectfully declines. Atjd very right1 all during the Huguenots12 on Thursday. Isn't it capital}*
too.'
"' Very right to be respectful, my dear,' persisted Mamma, ' but
Miss Lindley is a very estimable young lady, and would make your
friend an excellent wife.'
'"But my friend don't want an excellent wife, Mamma,' said
Augustus.
" 'Then he does not deserve one, dear.'
"'Upon my word,' said Gussy, dropping his arms helplessly as he
sat on the sofa, and as I could ate perfectly well, imitating something i
that Mh. Martimgale had been saying ana doing, 'you seem to think !
the grand object of » man's life is getting married. " It will be a good
thing when thnt old-fashioned superstition is done away with.' The Eeviled of the Record.
" Mamma did not answer, but she smiled rather indulgently; and
Gussy did not quite like that, and returned to his friend's particular In a recent number of the Record appears a paragraph, headed
case "The New Attorney - Gen isbal Unsound on the Sabbath
"' Now what should Kersey Martingale marry for, in the name of Question." Sir Richard Bethell is thus denounced to the puri-
common sense? We talked the matter over in his rooms this morning, tanical portion of society, tor having, in a speech at Aylesbury, very
He told me all about it. ' What should I marry/or/" said he. ' Why j mildly professed himself in favour of innocent recreation for the people
am I to sacrifice all m> liberty, and comfort ? See here. The governor 1 oa Sundays. Attorney-General Bethell is a man of too large
allows me four hundre 1 a-year, and I can live on that, and be as jolly ideas for.tne Scribes (and Pharisees) of the Record: who prefer the
narrow views of Little Bethel.
1 Will you mind your grammar, Miss. Names like school-girls 1 __
2 Same remark. Who wouldn't ? School-girls?
3 Obscure. You omit, we suppose, " But you remark that I am making the very suspicious
abbreviation T satirise." Very careless. And from what is a sister different?
* Very well. Bu' you should not ridicule the institutions of your country. A Person, professing to be an Englishman, and who save the name of
I ^X^JS^Iti&JBfiu nob-you meant it I g-*-ABLl, ™ last ™* "topped when about to enter the Tuileries.
7 Caustic, but very true. We sometimes suffer from the eagerness of everybody to j He wag, however, permitted 1.0 pass, 0(1 the PRINCESS LlEVEN, WuO
laugh at a joke which, coming from us, must be good. I happened to be ou the spot, becoming answerable for him.
241
MARY ANN'S NOTIONS.
ear Mr. Punch, — " You
to say about men in general,
because I want to tell you
something about, one man in
particular. Sue1! a triumph!
twice, but was put down in the moat awful manner, and with a regular
House of Commons speech. ' Sentiments, Sir, unworthy alike of the
education which it has been your good fortune to receive, and of the
society amid which you are so advantageously placed.'4 But though
Gussy was silenced, he was not convinced, and about a month &go he
was giving us Mr. Martikgale's ideas about being married. I wish I
had written them down at the timp, but I think I can remember enough
to make you see what kind of a Yourjg Englander Mr. Kersey is,
" 'Kersey's governor wants him to be married,' said Augustus, as
if he were recounting some grievous wrong to his friend. ' Ni>w I know
as a sand-boy.8 I so everywhere; see no end of life ; stop at people's
houses in the country; get my hunting and shooting and all that, and
am bothered with no keeping up appearances. Here ate my three
rooms, and there's my setvant, and who wants anything moreP I'm
must kindly let me interrupt hanged if I do. And the governor won't let me be contented and
myself in what I was going | baopy.'
" ' Stem and cruel parient,' said I.9
" ' O, of course,' retorted Mr. Gussy, 'you are on the other side.
Never mind, it's natural in you. Well, I could say nothing in reply,'
he went on, 'except that it was for fncu to corsider whether he hadn't
Such fun! best stand well with his governor, who bad behaved well to him, and
"This Mr. Martingale i all that, and that I supposed the old gentleman would do something
—Cuhzon Martingale is , handsome, if his views were met.'
his name, and his friends ; "'You gave a son good advice, my dear,' said Mamma, ' though you
call him Kersey (what i pretend to say that 3 ou spoke heartlessly. I know you, dear.'
affectation that is in men! " Guss actually coloured, having no notion of being thought good
giving or.e another little pet; against his wdi.10 However, be went on.
names, like school-girls,1 j "' I said what I tell you ' But,' said Kersey, ' what does meeting
when you know all the time S his views mean? That I'm to give up my fieedom, which is thfl one
that they2 wouldn't, walk ' thing of all that I enjoy ; that I am to take one house and live in it, »iid
across the street to help receive proper people there, and go to their houses, whether I like 'em
their beloved friends) was a or not, and g'ow. stuck up, and cut the pleasantest folks I know,
great ally of my brother because they are not exactly society for steady persons, and escort my
Augustus. Gussy (yes, but! wife about, and go nowhere unless she can go (fancy that!), and never
a sister's different3) u»ed to! start off out of town any more, with no fuss and peoaration, ayid
believe in Kersey, and dress ' wander about as I please, and come back in a month, 0- two, or six.
and nobody to control me, or ask me to account for myself—'
" ' Actually pathetic,' I said, laughing out; for I declare that
Gussy had got into quite a whining tone, as he was describing the
dreadful slavery with whicb. his friend was threatened. 'Isn't it
Solomon's Proverbs. He I terrible, Mamma?'
tried with Papa once orj "' A ff-w months of married life would cure Mr. Martingale of
those wild ideas,' said Mamma.
" ' That's what I told the fellah,' cried Gussy, ' and thit made him
ever so much wilder. ' He wasn't going to be cured of liking liberty,
and what right had anybody to cure him?'
" ' Misl, Lindley, of whose feelings in the mutter nobody speaks, is
to be congratulated, I think,' said Mamma, ' on not being ma.de the
victim of an experiment.'
" ' O, hang it,' salt Mr. Augustus, ' it would be a precious good
mafch for her. Kersey would have a capital allowance now, and the
bulk of the Lincolnshire estates after his father. And a very g od-
like him, and adopt his
opinions, such as they were,
and retail them to Mamma
and me as if they were
the young lady old Mr. Martingale was thinking of, and she is a 1 looking fellah, too, and good-tempered, if nobody crosses him. Any
very nice, sweet-tempered girl, not exactly pretty,6 but very pleasing,
and really accomplished. She is a cousin of Kersey's, and they Lave
known one another from children.'
"' And quite time he should, my dear,' said Mamma. This was one
for Mr. Gussy.6 who is older than Mr. Martingale.
" ' Well, he don't see it in that light,' said Gussy.
know in what light Mr. Martingale sees marriage
how, hhe ought to jump at it.'
" And the magnificent Mr. Guss went off to smoke his Weed,11 and
to meditate upon his friend's noble attachment to liberty.
" My dear Mr. Punch, Kxrsey Martingale has gone and run away
with a girl who sings at concerts, (quite a proper person, I believe,
who earns a good deal of money,) and has married her, aud his father
refuses to see him, and has cut down his allowance to one quarter of
" Your affectionate,
" Mary Ann."
8 Did he explain why a sand-boy should be jolly 1
9 More shame for you, to quote a low and stupid song.
*o You do not imitate your dear Mamma's charitv, Mif s M. A.
11 You seem afraid of the word. There is no objection to it, dear. Tobacco was
a Virginian weed, until cultivated.
12 You had better have been listening to Meyerbekb than to gossip.
13 No personal appeals to us. We remark, but do not reply.
persisted Mamma, 'but I think he is standing in his own light, in I what it was, and Mr. Curzon will have to live in apartments in the
objecting to it.' And my dear Mamma looked quite pleased with her- j New Hoad, and attend his wife—yes, Wife, (spell it with a big letter,
self and her neat little speech, which even Mr. Augustus condescended [ it looks like digging it into him) to all her concerts, and hold her
to nod at, as not bad. If one of his fast companions had said it, he ' shawl, and carry her music home, and eaten Mm going into the country
would have roared, and gone about repeating it everywhere.7 j without her leave. She has a will of her own, they tell me, as she ought
"' It is Jane Lindley, of course,' i said. to have, being the hf ad of the family aud its support.
"'I 'hleeve so,' said Guss, ' but 1 didn't ask. The principle's the j " Gussy would not tell this. He whs ashamed fo. But I heard it
same, whoever it is. Kersey respectfully declines. Atjd very right1 all during the Huguenots12 on Thursday. Isn't it capital}*
too.'
"' Very right to be respectful, my dear,' persisted Mamma, ' but
Miss Lindley is a very estimable young lady, and would make your
friend an excellent wife.'
'"But my friend don't want an excellent wife, Mamma,' said
Augustus.
" 'Then he does not deserve one, dear.'
"'Upon my word,' said Gussy, dropping his arms helplessly as he
sat on the sofa, and as I could ate perfectly well, imitating something i
that Mh. Martimgale had been saying ana doing, 'you seem to think !
the grand object of » man's life is getting married. " It will be a good
thing when thnt old-fashioned superstition is done away with.' The Eeviled of the Record.
" Mamma did not answer, but she smiled rather indulgently; and
Gussy did not quite like that, and returned to his friend's particular In a recent number of the Record appears a paragraph, headed
case "The New Attorney - Gen isbal Unsound on the Sabbath
"' Now what should Kersey Martingale marry for, in the name of Question." Sir Richard Bethell is thus denounced to the puri-
common sense? We talked the matter over in his rooms this morning, tanical portion of society, tor having, in a speech at Aylesbury, very
He told me all about it. ' What should I marry/or/" said he. ' Why j mildly professed himself in favour of innocent recreation for the people
am I to sacrifice all m> liberty, and comfort ? See here. The governor 1 oa Sundays. Attorney-General Bethell is a man of too large
allows me four hundre 1 a-year, and I can live on that, and be as jolly ideas for.tne Scribes (and Pharisees) of the Record: who prefer the
narrow views of Little Bethel.
1 Will you mind your grammar, Miss. Names like school-girls 1 __
2 Same remark. Who wouldn't ? School-girls?
3 Obscure. You omit, we suppose, " But you remark that I am making the very suspicious
abbreviation T satirise." Very careless. And from what is a sister different?
* Very well. Bu' you should not ridicule the institutions of your country. A Person, professing to be an Englishman, and who save the name of
I ^X^JS^Iti&JBfiu nob-you meant it I g-*-ABLl, ™ last ™* "topped when about to enter the Tuileries.
7 Caustic, but very true. We sometimes suffer from the eagerness of everybody to j He wag, however, permitted 1.0 pass, 0(1 the PRINCESS LlEVEN, WuO
laugh at a joke which, coming from us, must be good. I happened to be ou the spot, becoming answerable for him.