DOI Heft:
October 29, 1864
DOI Seite / Zitierlink:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16874#0190
184
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [October 29, 1864.
ALL THE DIFFERENCE.
Paterfamilias (who has come up on a Visit to his eldest “Hope” at St. Bottlenose). “ H’m, not a Bad Glass of Wine this, for
Oxbridge, Fred. What did you Give for it?”
Fred (airily). “Oh, Sixty-”
Paterfamilias. “And—Monstrous Extravagant, too ! Why, Sir, do you know that I never lay down a Dozen of Port that
COSTS ME MORE THAN SlX-AND-THIRTY ? ”
Fred. “ Ah, no more should I, Father, if I’d Nine Children to provide for, as you have ! ”
FOOD FOR CONFEDERATE POWDER.
Come along, ye sons of Erin, boys that scorns the name of slaves,
Let us fly to the land of Liberty, across the Atlantic waves ;
There I ’ll earn ten dollars a-day, bedad, if I don’t get drunk before,
And awake and come to meself again at drill in a Federal corps !
Thin I’ll march away to Richmond, or to Shenandoah Vale ;
For the Union sure I ’ll fight it is, and me cry shall be Repale !
There I ’ll go for death or victory, and I ’ll win renown and fame.
For the hated Saxon is me foe, or me foe is all the same.
Under Grant’s star-spangled banner, or with Sherman I ’ll be found,
Or in gallant Butler’s army dalin’ fire and whacks around.
And the wrongs of poor ould Ireland, that she suffered long ago,
Shall impart correctness to me aim, and vigour to me blow.
Until I’ve spent me blood’s last dhrop, and fetched me latest breath,
In the N orth’s pay, whilst I get it, I will battle to grim death •
After that, we ’ll all come back again, with a hundred thousand more,
Having mended the big Republic that rebellious faction tore ;
With our empty sleeves pinned, nately to the bosoms of our coats,
And our wooden legs, and our pockets all cram-full of greenback notes,
And we ’ll kick the base invader where he came from o’er the sea,
Then hurroo for the United States, and Ireland to be free !
Unpublished Anecdote.—Grinling Gibbons offered to bet that
he would carve a woodcock in twenty minutes. Sir Charles Wager
cned, “ Done ! ” and was ; for Grinling accomplished his task within
the time the next day—at dinner.
A DOUBTFUL RECOMMENDATION.
When they preach a sermon, parsons very often say too much: but
here even in an advertisement is a specimen of clerical redundancy ol
language:—
T'O the RESIDENTS OF MAYFAIR.—A young clergyman, who
mixes in society, is desirous of being received into a house, where two or three
rooms oould be placed at his disposal. He seeks an introduction to some lady or
gentleman, in this neighbourhood, whose house may be larger than required.
Address, <fcc.
We do not quite see the advantage for a man who wants some
lodgings to recommend himself by saying that he “ mixes in Society,”
for the phrase provokes a question as to what sort of society it is in
which he mixes, and what sort of drink it is that he is accustomed there
to mix. A man who mixed, say, gin-and-water in the society of Shore-
ditch, would hardly be allowed to mix a sherry-cobler in that about
Mayfair. So if this young parson fails to find his advertisement assist
him to the lodgings he requires, we think he may assign his failure
somewhat to the doubtful language he employs.
Climbing' Fish.
The other day a deputation from the Thames Angling Society attended
by appointment before the Conservators of the River Thames to apply
for the erection of fish ladders at the weirs of Teddington and Moulsey
Locks. On hearing what Mr. Frank Buckland had to say for this
request, the Board gave their engineer instructions to fit two ladders to
each of those weirs. No reasonable doubt is entertained that the fish
will scale the ladders—except the eels.
Motto for the Davenports.—Shut up.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [October 29, 1864.
ALL THE DIFFERENCE.
Paterfamilias (who has come up on a Visit to his eldest “Hope” at St. Bottlenose). “ H’m, not a Bad Glass of Wine this, for
Oxbridge, Fred. What did you Give for it?”
Fred (airily). “Oh, Sixty-”
Paterfamilias. “And—Monstrous Extravagant, too ! Why, Sir, do you know that I never lay down a Dozen of Port that
COSTS ME MORE THAN SlX-AND-THIRTY ? ”
Fred. “ Ah, no more should I, Father, if I’d Nine Children to provide for, as you have ! ”
FOOD FOR CONFEDERATE POWDER.
Come along, ye sons of Erin, boys that scorns the name of slaves,
Let us fly to the land of Liberty, across the Atlantic waves ;
There I ’ll earn ten dollars a-day, bedad, if I don’t get drunk before,
And awake and come to meself again at drill in a Federal corps !
Thin I’ll march away to Richmond, or to Shenandoah Vale ;
For the Union sure I ’ll fight it is, and me cry shall be Repale !
There I ’ll go for death or victory, and I ’ll win renown and fame.
For the hated Saxon is me foe, or me foe is all the same.
Under Grant’s star-spangled banner, or with Sherman I ’ll be found,
Or in gallant Butler’s army dalin’ fire and whacks around.
And the wrongs of poor ould Ireland, that she suffered long ago,
Shall impart correctness to me aim, and vigour to me blow.
Until I’ve spent me blood’s last dhrop, and fetched me latest breath,
In the N orth’s pay, whilst I get it, I will battle to grim death •
After that, we ’ll all come back again, with a hundred thousand more,
Having mended the big Republic that rebellious faction tore ;
With our empty sleeves pinned, nately to the bosoms of our coats,
And our wooden legs, and our pockets all cram-full of greenback notes,
And we ’ll kick the base invader where he came from o’er the sea,
Then hurroo for the United States, and Ireland to be free !
Unpublished Anecdote.—Grinling Gibbons offered to bet that
he would carve a woodcock in twenty minutes. Sir Charles Wager
cned, “ Done ! ” and was ; for Grinling accomplished his task within
the time the next day—at dinner.
A DOUBTFUL RECOMMENDATION.
When they preach a sermon, parsons very often say too much: but
here even in an advertisement is a specimen of clerical redundancy ol
language:—
T'O the RESIDENTS OF MAYFAIR.—A young clergyman, who
mixes in society, is desirous of being received into a house, where two or three
rooms oould be placed at his disposal. He seeks an introduction to some lady or
gentleman, in this neighbourhood, whose house may be larger than required.
Address, <fcc.
We do not quite see the advantage for a man who wants some
lodgings to recommend himself by saying that he “ mixes in Society,”
for the phrase provokes a question as to what sort of society it is in
which he mixes, and what sort of drink it is that he is accustomed there
to mix. A man who mixed, say, gin-and-water in the society of Shore-
ditch, would hardly be allowed to mix a sherry-cobler in that about
Mayfair. So if this young parson fails to find his advertisement assist
him to the lodgings he requires, we think he may assign his failure
somewhat to the doubtful language he employs.
Climbing' Fish.
The other day a deputation from the Thames Angling Society attended
by appointment before the Conservators of the River Thames to apply
for the erection of fish ladders at the weirs of Teddington and Moulsey
Locks. On hearing what Mr. Frank Buckland had to say for this
request, the Board gave their engineer instructions to fit two ladders to
each of those weirs. No reasonable doubt is entertained that the fish
will scale the ladders—except the eels.
Motto for the Davenports.—Shut up.