DOI Heft:
July 1, 1865
DOI Seite / Zitierlink: https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16875#0269
JULY l, 1H65.) PUNCH OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI
261
!
OH, HOW KIND!!
Miss Spriggs. “Flora, love, it is most Imprudent oe you to come on the Grass in those Thin Boots. You should really
go in, and put on Goloshes. You will eind mine in the Umbrella-Stand; and you are quite Welcome to them!”
(The grass is as dry as tinder ; and if Miss Spriggs’s feet were as pretty as Flora’s, we don’t think she would be so
anxious about Flora’s health.)
LORD RUSSELL’S TRIUMPH.
{To Mr. Punch—a Retort Uncourteous.)
You complain of my writing so many despatches :
My inkstand you’d drain, clap my pen under hatches :
Yet now that this troublesome brute Theodorus
Contrives to out-wit, and out-bounce, and out-roar us,
Gets the whole Office round into whine and hot-water,
(As, indeed, perhaps, one who is styled Negus ought-ter):
Now a civis Rormnus and eke consularis
Lies in chains (to say nothing of two mission-aries).
If you ’ll read up the papers, and look for the reason
Why this savage has thus brought Britannia her knees on,
Forced us meekly to swallow such gross violations,
At all points, small and great, of the high law of nations,—
Stir down to its depths all the dirt we have swallowed,
The wrong that came first, and the snubbing that followed:
Our presents pooh-poohed, and our offers evaded.
The country, and even the Office, degraded.
Stern’s and Lowenthal’s suffering and Cameron’s fetter . . .
It’s all through my not having written a letter !
On the Announcement in the Times of June 20, 1865,
Of the Marriage of Miss Sewell to Robert Last, Esq.
The Bride’s name first, before her Lord’s P
Sure, fashions must be changing fast;
Yet it fulfils the Scripture’s words.
The first hereafter shall be last.
A Handy Joke for a Host.—Will you take Champagne ? Don’t
say no; say Ay.
FASHIONABLE AMBIGUITY.
The Post of Saturday last week says :—
“ Lady L. had her first dance this season last night at the family residence
in Portman Square.”
As this is announced as a matter of public information, we may be
allowed to inquire, what is precisely meant by the statement that Lady
L. had her first dance ? To “ have ” a dance is, in customary lan-
guage, a phrase for to dance. “We’ll have a dance upon the heath,”
as the Witches in Macbeth sing. In having a dance there is something
that seems of quite a personal and private nature. It is one thing to
“ have ” a dance, and another to “ give ” a dance; but, though we are
told that Lady L. had a dance, probably we are expected to under-
stand that her Ladyship gave one. And surely we are not to suppose
that she is in the peculiar habit of dancing at certain seasons, and
danced for thp first time this season the other night. Otherwise, in
knowing when Lady L. had her first dance, the community are as
much concerned as they would be to know when Lord L. smoked
his first cigar.
A Stanza from Sydenham.
The Singers in the Handel choir
So well have earned their fame,
That each should have, if he desire,
A Handel to his name.
all “dicky” with him.
A Great sensational newspaper paragraph was made, a week ago,
out of the fact that Mr. Richard Bethell was tapped on his shoulder
by a sheriff’s officer while enjoying the sport on Ascot Heath. His
release should be headed in the largest type, “ Richard’s himself
again.”
Vol. 48.
9—2
261
!
OH, HOW KIND!!
Miss Spriggs. “Flora, love, it is most Imprudent oe you to come on the Grass in those Thin Boots. You should really
go in, and put on Goloshes. You will eind mine in the Umbrella-Stand; and you are quite Welcome to them!”
(The grass is as dry as tinder ; and if Miss Spriggs’s feet were as pretty as Flora’s, we don’t think she would be so
anxious about Flora’s health.)
LORD RUSSELL’S TRIUMPH.
{To Mr. Punch—a Retort Uncourteous.)
You complain of my writing so many despatches :
My inkstand you’d drain, clap my pen under hatches :
Yet now that this troublesome brute Theodorus
Contrives to out-wit, and out-bounce, and out-roar us,
Gets the whole Office round into whine and hot-water,
(As, indeed, perhaps, one who is styled Negus ought-ter):
Now a civis Rormnus and eke consularis
Lies in chains (to say nothing of two mission-aries).
If you ’ll read up the papers, and look for the reason
Why this savage has thus brought Britannia her knees on,
Forced us meekly to swallow such gross violations,
At all points, small and great, of the high law of nations,—
Stir down to its depths all the dirt we have swallowed,
The wrong that came first, and the snubbing that followed:
Our presents pooh-poohed, and our offers evaded.
The country, and even the Office, degraded.
Stern’s and Lowenthal’s suffering and Cameron’s fetter . . .
It’s all through my not having written a letter !
On the Announcement in the Times of June 20, 1865,
Of the Marriage of Miss Sewell to Robert Last, Esq.
The Bride’s name first, before her Lord’s P
Sure, fashions must be changing fast;
Yet it fulfils the Scripture’s words.
The first hereafter shall be last.
A Handy Joke for a Host.—Will you take Champagne ? Don’t
say no; say Ay.
FASHIONABLE AMBIGUITY.
The Post of Saturday last week says :—
“ Lady L. had her first dance this season last night at the family residence
in Portman Square.”
As this is announced as a matter of public information, we may be
allowed to inquire, what is precisely meant by the statement that Lady
L. had her first dance ? To “ have ” a dance is, in customary lan-
guage, a phrase for to dance. “We’ll have a dance upon the heath,”
as the Witches in Macbeth sing. In having a dance there is something
that seems of quite a personal and private nature. It is one thing to
“ have ” a dance, and another to “ give ” a dance; but, though we are
told that Lady L. had a dance, probably we are expected to under-
stand that her Ladyship gave one. And surely we are not to suppose
that she is in the peculiar habit of dancing at certain seasons, and
danced for thp first time this season the other night. Otherwise, in
knowing when Lady L. had her first dance, the community are as
much concerned as they would be to know when Lord L. smoked
his first cigar.
A Stanza from Sydenham.
The Singers in the Handel choir
So well have earned their fame,
That each should have, if he desire,
A Handel to his name.
all “dicky” with him.
A Great sensational newspaper paragraph was made, a week ago,
out of the fact that Mr. Richard Bethell was tapped on his shoulder
by a sheriff’s officer while enjoying the sport on Ascot Heath. His
release should be headed in the largest type, “ Richard’s himself
again.”
Vol. 48.
9—2