DOI issue:
December 12, 1874
DOI Page / Citation link:https://doi.org/10.11588/diglit.16939#0261
254
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
[Decembek 12, 1874.
HEBREWS OE THE HEBREWS.
Ms. Edwa rd Hine has recently delivered a Lecture at 'Woolwich
in which he has attempted to prove that the “ so-called Anglo-
Saxons ” are in reality the lost Ten Tribes of Israel. According to
the report of his
very interesting dis-
course, it appears
that he advanced a
great number of
identities in proof of
his argument, and
even referred to the
structure of English
Churches, and va-
rious phrases in the
Book of Common
Prayer, as evidence
of our Israelitish
descent.
Doubtless, Me.
Hine has exhausted
the subject. Still,
with that politeness
which is “ a further
argument of his
Jewish origin,” Mr.
Punch begs to ad-
vance a few more
proofs, which he
(Mr. Punch) may
add are heartily at
the worthy Lec-
turer’s service.
If there be one of
the lost tribes to
which England is
more closely related
than the rest, it must
be Issachar, for what
is England if not “a
strong ass crouching
betwixt burdens?”
Englishmen are
like Jews because
they show hatred of
pig’s flesh by eating
“ pork sausages ”
made of everything
hut—pork!
Because, without
doubt, the Hebrides
were once spelt He-
brewdes.
Look at Mr.
Punch's nose. Jew-
ish all over. But is
not Mr. P. a tho-
rough Englishman ?
Because one of the
most primitive mu-
sical instruments in
England is called
the Jew’s harp.
Because so many
highborn young
Englishmen (when
thrown over by their
friends) make a
point of going
straight to the Jews.
Because, like the
Jews, Englishmen
take such good care
of their poor that a
beggar is never seen
in England!
Because in Eng-
land there is, as in “ ~ ~
Judsea there was, a Temple; and many of the churches of England
have still their high priests.
Because, while many of our purveyors of liquor are positive Jews,
to judge by their prices, all our male beer-makers are undoubtedly
He brewers, and, therefore, Jews comparative, as well as positive.
Lastly, because, according to Me. Daewin, both Jews and
Christians have a common progenitor in one of the anthropoid apes.
THINGS TO BE REMEMBERED.
What day your irritating friend Snael said he would come to
luncheon, that you may go into the country.
What was the name of the man you hadn’t seen for an age, who
__made you promise
A NEW COMPOUND VERB.
Sudden Apparition. “Papa, Deak, you know that Mamma said that if we had
Bdttek with ode Toast, we weken’t to have anything else ! Well, Geokge has not
only Buttered his Toast, but he’s actually been and Liebig’s-Extract-of-Beefed it
as well ! ”
to dine at his Club,
and drink some of
‘‘the finest Claret
in London, by Jove,
Sir.”
Where you left
your new silk um-
brella after that
jolly Oyster Supper
last night.
Who borrowed the
most cherished hook
in your library, and
seems to have for-
gotten to return it.
What the deuce it
was your wife wants
so particularly for
dinner that you ’re
not to come back
without it.
Which of the
many pockets of
your two coats you
put your railway
ticket in, when the
Guard wakes you
suddenly about three
in the morning, on
your way to your
grouse quarters, by
the Scotch Express.
What your Uncle
the Archdeacon’s
Sermon was about,
with a view to the
intelligent yet de-
ferential criticism
naturally expected
of you when you
dine with him in the
course of the week.
What time the
train starts, by which
you are to travel to a
certain ducal man-
sion.
Which corridor of
that ducal mansion
leads to your bed-
room, as it might be
awkward, after late
billiards or. smoke,
to stumble into the
chamber of. one. of
those charming girls-
that beautified the
drawing-room.
What day Mr.
Punch publishes his
Almanack, that you
may win universal
welcome at home by
bringing an early
copy for each mem-
ber of your family.
UNLIMITED
LIABILITY.
The promulga-
tion of Papal Infalli-
bility may he ex-
pected materially to reduce the conversion-rate amongst young men
at the Universities educated for the Church.. There are perhaps a
few of these who, having signed the Thirty-nine Articles, would be
ready to say, if they thought it advisable, “What is the next
article ?” But it is only the very few of those few who would asK
this question seriously, and reiterate it like a shopman, that are likely
henceforth to go the way which has been trodden by Manning.
PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.
[Decembek 12, 1874.
HEBREWS OE THE HEBREWS.
Ms. Edwa rd Hine has recently delivered a Lecture at 'Woolwich
in which he has attempted to prove that the “ so-called Anglo-
Saxons ” are in reality the lost Ten Tribes of Israel. According to
the report of his
very interesting dis-
course, it appears
that he advanced a
great number of
identities in proof of
his argument, and
even referred to the
structure of English
Churches, and va-
rious phrases in the
Book of Common
Prayer, as evidence
of our Israelitish
descent.
Doubtless, Me.
Hine has exhausted
the subject. Still,
with that politeness
which is “ a further
argument of his
Jewish origin,” Mr.
Punch begs to ad-
vance a few more
proofs, which he
(Mr. Punch) may
add are heartily at
the worthy Lec-
turer’s service.
If there be one of
the lost tribes to
which England is
more closely related
than the rest, it must
be Issachar, for what
is England if not “a
strong ass crouching
betwixt burdens?”
Englishmen are
like Jews because
they show hatred of
pig’s flesh by eating
“ pork sausages ”
made of everything
hut—pork!
Because, without
doubt, the Hebrides
were once spelt He-
brewdes.
Look at Mr.
Punch's nose. Jew-
ish all over. But is
not Mr. P. a tho-
rough Englishman ?
Because one of the
most primitive mu-
sical instruments in
England is called
the Jew’s harp.
Because so many
highborn young
Englishmen (when
thrown over by their
friends) make a
point of going
straight to the Jews.
Because, like the
Jews, Englishmen
take such good care
of their poor that a
beggar is never seen
in England!
Because in Eng-
land there is, as in “ ~ ~
Judsea there was, a Temple; and many of the churches of England
have still their high priests.
Because, while many of our purveyors of liquor are positive Jews,
to judge by their prices, all our male beer-makers are undoubtedly
He brewers, and, therefore, Jews comparative, as well as positive.
Lastly, because, according to Me. Daewin, both Jews and
Christians have a common progenitor in one of the anthropoid apes.
THINGS TO BE REMEMBERED.
What day your irritating friend Snael said he would come to
luncheon, that you may go into the country.
What was the name of the man you hadn’t seen for an age, who
__made you promise
A NEW COMPOUND VERB.
Sudden Apparition. “Papa, Deak, you know that Mamma said that if we had
Bdttek with ode Toast, we weken’t to have anything else ! Well, Geokge has not
only Buttered his Toast, but he’s actually been and Liebig’s-Extract-of-Beefed it
as well ! ”
to dine at his Club,
and drink some of
‘‘the finest Claret
in London, by Jove,
Sir.”
Where you left
your new silk um-
brella after that
jolly Oyster Supper
last night.
Who borrowed the
most cherished hook
in your library, and
seems to have for-
gotten to return it.
What the deuce it
was your wife wants
so particularly for
dinner that you ’re
not to come back
without it.
Which of the
many pockets of
your two coats you
put your railway
ticket in, when the
Guard wakes you
suddenly about three
in the morning, on
your way to your
grouse quarters, by
the Scotch Express.
What your Uncle
the Archdeacon’s
Sermon was about,
with a view to the
intelligent yet de-
ferential criticism
naturally expected
of you when you
dine with him in the
course of the week.
What time the
train starts, by which
you are to travel to a
certain ducal man-
sion.
Which corridor of
that ducal mansion
leads to your bed-
room, as it might be
awkward, after late
billiards or. smoke,
to stumble into the
chamber of. one. of
those charming girls-
that beautified the
drawing-room.
What day Mr.
Punch publishes his
Almanack, that you
may win universal
welcome at home by
bringing an early
copy for each mem-
ber of your family.
UNLIMITED
LIABILITY.
The promulga-
tion of Papal Infalli-
bility may he ex-
pected materially to reduce the conversion-rate amongst young men
at the Universities educated for the Church.. There are perhaps a
few of these who, having signed the Thirty-nine Articles, would be
ready to say, if they thought it advisable, “What is the next
article ?” But it is only the very few of those few who would asK
this question seriously, and reiterate it like a shopman, that are likely
henceforth to go the way which has been trodden by Manning.