Punch (30.1856)

222

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[May 31, 1856.


PUNCH'S ILLUSTRATIONS TO SHAKSPEARE
" But seest thou not what a deformed thief this fashion is ? "
Much Ado about Nothing, Act hi., Scene 3.

PEALS LOR THE PftACtt !
By the Bells about London.
John Bull looks scaly,
^ay the hells by Old Bailey :
The Peace is a do,
Rings the Peace-peal at Kew.
Is it worth fifty millions?
A-k the chimes of St,. ti-len's ;
And the thousands who've died?
Add the bells of St. Bade.
Them gunboats a pity !
Peals the grammariess City :
And who'd care for more taxes ?
St. Clement's peal axes.
But lighting's a sin,
Sr. Clapham chimes in.
Russia should pav the bill,
Tolls St. Mary-at-Hili :
And cede Nicolaieff too,
Again rings out Kew.
—Pray, who brought it about,"
Asks St. Borolph Without:
Not England—that's sartin:
Says the peal of St. Martin.
Then whom shall we hang ?
The St. Pnncras bells clang;
Hanged if I ca e 10 know.
Swings the great bell of Bow.

Removal.
The Government Offices, it is generally re-
oorted, are lo be transferred f>om Downing
Street to Exeter Hall. The Premier's Depart-
ment, for the future, is to held in the rooms
in which the business of the "Bitter Observance
of the Sabbath " is transacted.

THE ILLUMINATIONS. MACHINERY FOR, TAXATION.
(A n — \ | To prevent the evasion of the Fire Insurance Duty by insuring pro-
{As they were—not.) ; perty in Paris, our Government proo< ses to compel all persons so
' insuring their property to take out a licence and pay the English duty,
under a penalty of £100. This is a very clever trick so far as it goes,
but not quite clever enough. How ate " Stamps and Taxes" to know
whether John Styles has contacted a French insurance or not? By
putting him to the question ? It must be the question-extraordinary,
taen; forMe.. Stylus will not probably feel himself bound to answer io
bis own prejudice the ordinary question toucuiug his private affairs. The
boot, the thumbscrew, the scavenger's daughter, must be employed
to extract the truth from Mr. Soles ; and British as well ai Ind'an
tevenue will have to be raised by torture.

Among the more particularly remarkable and appropriate devices for
the Illumination, we may notice the following:—
Treasury Office.—The Knave of Clubs—a beautifully-coloured tran-
sparency. Motto—in letters composed of brilliant variegated lamps,
" Trumps Follow Tricks."
Office of the Chancellor of the Exchequer.—A fine transparency repre-
senting John Bull exhibiting a joyous countenance through the aper-
ture of a horse-collar, that mece of harness having inscribed on it, in
gold letters, the legend, "Income Tax for Ever!" The whole sur-
mounted with a trlorv, consisting of gas-lights, so arranged as to form
the figu-e of " £100,000,000."
Horse-Guards.—A transparency exhibiting Justice with her bandage
over one eye. Beneath the figure the proverb, illuminated, " Kissing
goes by Favour,"
Admiralty.—An allegorical transparency—Paralysis presenting Gaufc
with au Admiral's flag. Motto—" Seniores Priores."
Exeter Hall.—A transparency forming a beautiful illustration of tran-
sparent humbug—Cant fraternising with Hypocrisy : Cant represented
as crowned with an archbishop's mitre, and Hypocrisy depicted in the
character of Mawworm. Motto—"Here We Are! "
Somerset House.—A transparent tableau representing Industry and
her sons resting from their labours at 4 o'clock. Motto—"The Early
Bird picks up the Worm." '
The Court of Chancery.—Equity swallowing an oyster, and dividing
the shell between Jarndyce and Jarndyce. The transparency forming
this touching picture surmounted by the maxim, set forth in lamps of
yarious colours, "Equity doth follow Law."
Mansion House.—A grand naval transparency of Abstinence present-
ing the Loving Cup to Sobriety on the occasion of Peace—the figure o*-
Peace represented whh attendant turtles. Motto, in very large jets of
brilliant gas, the word, " Reform."

Homoeopathic Globules.
a little Medical learning is a dangerous thing.
The billionth part of a grain of sense is worth a whole pound of physic.
The art is not to dispense niedicine, but to dispense with it.
In bodily repairs, the least given the soonest mended.
Doctors make more diseases than they ever cure.

THAT BIRD AGAIN.

Again, the bird lias built itself in a letter-box. The bird, at least once
in three years, always does. This season, the bird has huilt in a box—
(we have the fact on the assurance of the Yorkshireman)—near Thorpe
Hall, between Bridlington and Thwing. The bird, tbif vear, is a blue
tit-mouse. It was at first resolved to destroy Ik. and Mks. Titmouse
—(Mrs. T. had already laid some eggs)—lest they should imitate Sir
James Graham, and from " tfteir propensity to peck and nibble " every-
thing, should poke their bills into other people's letters : however, more
merciful counsels prevailed; and the tit-mice will, it is expected, beau
tifuily illustrate the influence of letters by good breeding.

The Plague of the Pavements.
We are requested to get a Bill enacted by Parliament providing that
all Perambulators shall, under a severe penalty, be furnished with
buffers, in part to soften the collision with the legs of persons who are
looking at print-shop windows, and against whose lower limbs those
vehicles are propelled by nursemaids who do not mind where they are
going, probably by reason of being absorbed in thinking about soldiers.

Lovers' Stakes.—A Sporting young Lady says, "If 'the course of
true love never does run smooth,' why don't they water it, and roll it
regularly so many hours a-day, until they get the course so smooth
that, auv donkey could run upon it ? "