Punch (33.1857)

September 26. 1857 1 PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. U&

First Coster. " Why, Jack ! What's all that ? "

Second Do. "Well, I oan't sat ! Unless it's Fireworks ! "

ROBBING A MARE'S NEST.

" SlK,

" I ope you'll illow me to say jest one word in
bearf of a Wurthy and Respectable body of Menu attacted
by a hojus and onjust insinwasion. Look here, Sir, at this
ear parrowgraph, as apeard won day last week in the Times
nnscpaper:—

"A Significant Fact.—After the bankruptcy of Messrs. Mare
and Co., the extensive iron ship builders at Blackwall, nearly the
whole of the marine-store dealers'shops in that neighbourhood were
closed. The depredations by some of the men employed at these
works were immense, so much so that it was found absolutely essen-
tial to have a body of the Metropolitan Police stationed on the
premises to detect the offenders. The property stolen was estimated
at several thousand pounds per annum."

"Peraps, Sir, the menin of the abuv maint be quite
hobveus to You and your readers at fust sight, thearfour
it may be Necessary for me to ixplain for your and theer
infamation the Charge intended to be Conveyed in the
Same, bein as much as to say that Respectable Merchants
in our Line of biznis at Blackwall under pertence of wot
we calls Marine Stoars, wos in pint of fact deelers in
Stoaln Goods. This is wots ment to be Signifyd by the
Significant Pact which it is a liebill on as onist and eye-
minded a Boddy of Menn as ar anuther in the Kimmunity;
which avin thuss whiped horf the Stigmer confer'd by the
Times on our caricature, T remain, Sir, Your Most obeegent
umble Servint,

" Mount Pleasant, Sept., 1857, " John Raos."

" Deler in Marine Stoars."

" *** The Pull Yalley Given and no Questions ast.
Suspition hallways aunts the Gilty Minde."

Anglo-Saxon Sentiment.

May the rupture of the Electric Cable be, so long as the
same language binds the two nations together, the only
rupture between England and America !

Extensive Drapery.—At a Concert lately given at a
fashionable watering-place there were present 140 ladies, the
united circumferences of whose dresses amounted to 1760
yards.

BRITISH SCULPTURE EQUALLED IN ROMF.

John Bull cannot make a statue, and he never could; but there
are other people who could once and apparently can no more—witness
the foreign, as well as the native, models for the Wellington Monu-
ment. Witness not only those failures, but witness also a fiasco or
mull which has been made in the metropolis of Art itself, and that by
a Roman artist, and more than that, by an artist appointed and com-
missioned by the Pope himself. This is the monument which has
been erected by command of his Holiness on the Piazza di Spagna in
commemoration of the addition of the dogma of the Immaculate Con-
ception to the Roman Catholic creed; and which is described by the
correspondent of a contemporary as a—

" Colossal figure in bronxe, whose diameter exceeds that of the column which
supports it, to say nothing of the crescent and globe, surrounded by the emblems
of the evangelists, also in bronze, on which the Madonna stands, and which add
to the weight of the summit."

The author of this account goes on to describe the structure on
(vhich the statue is elevated as composed of marbles variously coloured
— gilt, yellow, white, greenish with white stripes; the pedestal also
sonsisting of coloured marbles. Thus the monument itself is an
irtistic conception which is quite the reverse of immaculate, and
ippears to typify the direct opposite of what the Pope intended it to
wmmemorate. According to our informant, moreover, the statue on
the top of the column is out of the perpendicular, and slopes so much
to the westward as to look unsafe, and to cause the Romans to quicken
their footsteps in passing it; whilst, raising suspicious glances at the
slanting image, they mutter, "pende "—it leans ! Now, a terremoto is
i not very uncommon occurrence in Italy, and if the monument is top-
aeavy, and loaded with a statue inclining from the centre of gravity,
sooner or later a catastrophe might happen which we may indicate m
the following adaptation irom one of the songs of infancy :—

" Hush-a-by statue, upon the pile's top.
When the earth shakes, the pillar will rock;
If the earth heaves the structure will fall:
And down will come statue, and dogma and all."

In the minds of a superstitious population the dogma will tumble

with the statue. If, however, the column should stand firm after
having received the benediction of the Pope, who had made arrange-
ments to bless it on the 8th of this month, of course the Tablet and
the Univers will assert that its stability in a position out of equilibrium
is maintained by a miracle. At present it appears to be simply a
marvel of incongruity, comicality, and misproportion, and John Bull
may rejoice in the knowledge that Italian genius has now at last pro-
duced a work of architecture and sculpture worthy of a place by the
side of our British chef d'oeuvre on the top of Burton's Arch ; which
it would keep in countenance, and at the same time assist in creating
public merriment.

THE BEST MONUMENT TO JENNER.

A Young lady was solicited to contribute towards the Jenner
Statue. "Nay," she said, reverently, "I consider I have already
erected a monument to his honour," and she pointed to_ her beautiful
countenance; and true enough, thanks to Jenner's discovery, there
could not be discerned upon it the smallest disfigurement by the small
pox. Acting upon this idea, we have to make the following smooth-
faced proposition. We beg to suggest that every handsome lady,
single or married, or widow, who, having been duly vaccinated, has
succeeded in preserving her beauty from the ravages of the above fearful
visitation, be requested to take her turn in standing for one hour only
of her lifetime on a pedestal in Trafalgar Square. We maintain that
the exhibition of her face, in its unblemished state of lovekness, would
be the handsomest, at the same time the most appropriate, statue that
could possibly be erected to Jenner ; and a statue, too, that would be
sure in every age to command the ready homage of all men.

Birds of a Feather.

The admirers (their name is not Legion) of " Cox of Pinsbury,"
boast that he has " sat" during the Session longer than any other
member. To what result ? In the absence of a reply, Mr. Punch
may observe that the disesteem popularly entertained for Crowing
Hens may be extended to Sitting Cox.