Punch: Punch (36.1859)

March 12, 1859. J

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI

101

StOUt GtHt. " DEAR ! DEAR ! So HE HAS FORMED an attachment that you don't approve of ! Ah !
■WELL, THERE 'S ALWAYS SOMETHING. DEPEND UPON it, Ma'AM, THERE'S A SKELETON SOMEWHERE IN EVERY

HovseI"

WHAT 'S HIS LITTLE
GAME?

Upon the whole we think the
Government have dealt pretty
fairly in the matter of Reform,
and although they have been
forced to sacrifice two trumps, it
would not surprise us to find
they "do the trick." Much de-
pends upon the way in which
Lord Pam will play his cards,
and he is much too old a hand to
let one_ get a peep at them. His
Lordship is, we know, a master of
finesse j and as the stakes are
rather high, we may depend he
will not wittingly let slip a chance
of winning. The game? as we may
see, is just now at its turning
point; and if it were played by the
rules of Five-card Loo, now is
just the time for Government to
call out: " Pam, be civil!"

An Early Season.

We noticed two or three peram-
bulators in the Sun last week.
They were very young specimens;
but it is rarely they make their
appearance before a more advanced
period of the season. They looked
fresh and healthy, though a little
pinched, we thought, by the cold.

The most useful form of
" Beat's Traction-engine."—A
well fed Donkey.

PUNCH'S ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

February 28. Monday. This was the Great Day of the Session. This
day did Benjamin Disraeli, Esq.—in other days author of a Revo-
lutionary Epic,—introduce a Reform Bill to the notice of the House of
Commons. Unable to trust himself to deal in prose with such a sub-
ject, saturated as it were with all the richest jews of poetry, Mr. Punch
has, upon another of his golden leaves, inscribed with pen of diamond
the story of this day. Here, therefore, it shall suffice to say that,
when Mr. Disraeli had made his speech, sundry Members ventured
remarks, but most of them in gingerly fashion; for an explanatory
oration is usually a thing which must be read before its theme can be
understood. Mr. Baxter, Member for Montrose, however, having
discovered that the measure, being avowedly an English Reform Bill,
did not affect Scotland, was safe in denouncing it on that ground.
Mr. Head lam was dissatisfied, but would wait; and Baxter, who
wanted Scotland put into the Bill, was obliged to withdraw his pro-
position. Mr. Crawford, another Scot, complained of the "insolent
silence " with which Scotland had been treated, upon which the Lord
Advocate promised a Scotch measure ; Mr. Eox said that the Bill did
not provide for the emancipation of the working classes; Lord John
Russell, suddenly inspired with-a veneration for those classes, whom
he has hitherto been thought to hold in no great regard as politicians,
said the same thing; Mr. Roebuck declared the Bill a boon to the
landed class; Mr. Bright, of course, abused it ore rotundo ; Mr,
Drummond scoffed at everybody, rather amusingly, and likened Lord
John to Alexander, and Mr. Roebuck to Thais ; and Lord Pal-
merston (Wily Old Party) had not heard enough about the Bill,
and wished to be supposed not to have any particular opinion at
present,—the W. 0. P. wishing to know what the country thought
upon a matter on which he is profoundly indifferent, except so far as
it affects political relations. Mr. Crossley spoke so; Mr. Edwin
James said he came in "fresh" from Marylebone, but spoke soberly
enough • Mr. Bentinck simply abused Mr. Bright ; and there were
some other speeches, not worth delivering or recollecting. After this,
Benjamin, like Falstaff, took all their points in his target, fenced
smartly enough, and fixed the second reading for Monday, the Twenty-
Eirst. Mr. Punch, who is not always exactly at Mr. Disraeli's feet,
begs on this occasion to make that gentleman a bow, and to state
that his manner of introducing a most important measure was worthy
of the occasion.

Lord Malmesbury explained that the Pope himself had asked the
French and Austrians to depart out of his dominions. This was a
marvellous modification of previous statements that they were cer-
tainly going; and it seems by no means sure that they mean to do
anything of the kind. One of the Bills for reforming the Debtor and
Creditor Law made progress ; Overstone obstante, as became a very
rich man, more likely to have debtors than creditors.

Tuesday. Lords Campbell, Brougham, and Cranworth helped on
a Bill for preventing people from being indicted until a magistrate
should have had an opportunity of looking into the case. Lord
Wensleydale thought this provision unconstitutional. This old
lawyer was stuck in the House to advise the Peers; and he gene-
rally gives advice which he would do inexpressibly better to keep to
himself.

The Commons had the pleasure of hearing Mr. Walpole state
gracefully, and Mr. Henley grumblingly, why they had respectively
quitted office. It is very meet and right tha^ such statements should
always be exacted, as everybody is interested in knowing that public
men act on high motives. There could be no doubt of the perfect
purity and the extreme absurdity of the reasons which actuated both
these gentlemen. Mr. Walpole is succeeded in the Home Office by
Mr. Sotheron Estcourt, and Mr. Henley at the Board of Trade by
Lord Donoughmore. After the explanations came an exceedingly
important and unreadable debate on the state of the Shipping interest;
and a Committee was appointed, to save the House the misfortune of
being again bored thereon.

Wednesday. If Titius dies, which he usually does some time or
another, and leaves personal property—not such an invariable, but an
equally laudable act—the law divides it among his representatives, in
case he makes no will (and if he makes none, he is a negligent and cul-
pable idiot); but if Titius leaves landed property under the same con-
ditions, it goes to his eldest son and heir. Mr. Locke King proposed
to assimilate the rules, and divide the land; but this is not a propo-
sition which was likely to find favour in England, a family-founding
nation; and after a debate, the whole weight of the House went
against the measure, which was rejected by 271 to 76. So, if Titius
wants to split up his land into slices, he must go to an attorney, and
get a will made; or make one himself, which will probably send his
representatives to the attorney with a squabble,—a course the latter
gentleman will probably prefer.

The Bill for undoing the Bill allowing Candidates to carry about