Punch (36.1859)

March 19, 1859] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. ni

FLOWERS OF VESTRYDOM.

palled upon their palate. Winking pictures serve no longer to excite
their veneration. The Papal showmen clearly are in want of taking
novelties. Now, we think St. Peter's title-deeds are just the very
things for them. The knowledge of the Univers, of course, is
universal; but, the Umvers excepted, nobody has knowledge of them.
Let the Univers be paid for the disclosure of their hiding-place, and let
the Pope proceed to advertise these interesting relics. When the
faithful have forked out their utmost for the sight of them, and no mere
money can be drawn by them into the Papal pockets, it would be easy
to get up " Another most Miraculous Discovery ! " and to
announce that His Holiness had found " St. Peter's Own Hand-
writing!!" wherein was conferred the Pope's life-interest in the
States. This might be be-postered in all the Romish Churches, as being
an " Additional Attraction ! !!" to the Show.

If the Roman States be still "the property of St. Peter," it would
almost seem to follow that St. Peter can't be dead: and this reflection
might give basis for a further imposition, and St. Peter might himself
be " discovered " by His Holiness, and be announced to act as showman
in the show of his own deeds. Anyhow, we think that the Porn
should have the benefit of the marvellous discovery which the Univers
has made, and that St. Peter's title-deeds should be immediately
looked up. They should be added to the " properties " of the Romish
Church, and be used on all occasions requiring an enhancement of
theatrical effect. Not being of the faithful, we have little faith in
relics; but we should quite as readily place credence in the genuine-
ness of St; Peter's Title-deeds as in St. Vitus's Dress Hair Shirt,, or
St. Filthius's Great Toe Nail, or in any other of the holy curiosities
which are now "on view" in any of the Peepshows of the Pope.

here was a Meeting the
other night, in the Vestry
Hall of St. Pancras, to con-
sider Lord Derby's Re-
form Bill, and a Church-
warden was stuck in ■ the
Chair. The Members for
Marylebone were ordered to
be in attendance, and were ;
and there also came a batch
of the Marylebone patriots,
whose names the public have
learned, as it will learn any
name incessantly thrust be-
fore it. There was also a
hall full of admirers of the
batch, and all Avent on as
vulgarly as could be desired.
That people who have not
the misfortune to be rate-
payers of St. Pancras, may
know the nature of those
who are the dictators
therein, Mr. Punch (with
sincere apologies to the lady
mentioned for helping to
bring her name before the
world), extracts a charming
epigram launched at the
wife of the Chancellor oe the Exchequer by one of the set,
named T. Ross. Objecting to the Savings' Bank clause in the Bill,
he said:—

" He would like to know how Mr. Disraeli would himself have fared in this
particular had he not married that rich old woman. {Laughter and Cheers.) He ques-
tioned if he would have saved twopence. {Laughter and luar, hear.) He was nothing
but a political adventurer, but it would not do this time. {Renewed cheering arid
laughter.)"

This argument against the Bill was received with the favour that
might be expected. The insolent allusion to Mrs. Disraeli was
rewarded with " cheering and laughter." That might be expected of
the people who admire St. Pancras spouters. Insult to a lady is just
the sort of illustrated logic they love. But there were two or three
gentlemen present. Sir Benjamin Hall, who is a gentleman, and
hopes to be a lord, was there. Why did he not tell the vulgarian
Ross that there was no necessity for brutality? Mr. Edwin James,
who is not only a gentleman, but an honourable and learned gentle-
man, was there. Could he not have smashed Ross with one of the
poetical quotations so telling on juries—

" Come, you Ross,
Shut up, old hoss,"

or some such effusion ? Mr. Wyld, M.P., who sells maps (and very
good ones), was there. Could he not have hinted to the fellow not to
get into such low latitude. None of them interfered, however, and
so we may charitably suppose sat humdiated at being obliged to
make speeches and answer for their conduct before an audience that
could accept as a political argument, a blackguard scoff at a man's
private means, and an offensive sneer at an inoffensive lady. Mr.
Punch is ready to go in for Manhood Suffrage, if it will take political

power out of the hands of unmanly snobs, and Mr. Ernest Jones! prtlm„ t1jt. d,, , „.„.„,.,„ -rrwiru

may call at No. S5, as soon as he likes, and swear Mr. P. to the J GO!NG TO THE FINISHING TOUCH

Charter.

ST. PETER AND THE POPE.

We read in the Daily News that:—

" The Univers advances a tremendous argument against the politicians who pro-
pose a re-organisation of the Roman States, viz., 'The Roman States are not the
property of Pius the Ninth, they are the property of St. Peter. The Pope has only
a life-interest in them.' "

"Tremendous" as it may be, we are not surprised to hear the
Unioers say this. It has so often tried to startle us with strange
statements about England, that we always keep our nerves well strung
up when we read it; and its comments upon other countries never can
astonish us. Yfe fancy we have now such perfect self-command, that
we could bear a much more terrifying story without wincing. We
should hardly feel astounded were the Univers to state, not only that
the Roman States were "the property of St. Peter," but that his
title-deeds had lately been discovered in the Vatican, and that the
faithful had received the Saint's permission to inspect them. Indeed,
we really almost wonder this idea has not been acted on, if only for the
sake of filling up the Papal purse. The faithful are getting tired of
their stock Church exhibitions. The sight of bleeding statues has

ADEIELD'S LAST.

Proceeding along Oxford Street the other day in company with a
little boy whom, in fulfilment of promise of a holiday, the onourable
Member for Sheffield was taking to a missionary meeting, Mr. Ad-
field's heye fell on a hall-mat exposed for sale, and bearing the
classical greeting " Salve !" This, of course, Mr. A. at first took
for an English monosyllable, and justly remarked that it was a rum
place to advertise salves and ointments on. But being set right by his
little companion, who translated the word into " Hail!" the onorable
Member immediately bought it as a present for a certain publican-
constituent, who, Mr. A. remarked, ought to hadvertise his Hale, it
was so strong and good.

Gentlemen's Fashions.

The sleeve is fuller than ever. A little more, and the old gigot
sleeve will be revived, with the simple difference that men will carry
the gigots, instead of the women. Lady M. says that the " peg-tops'"
are leaving the gentlemen's legs, and taking shelter under their arms.