Punch (30.1856)

May 24, 1856.]

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

209

THE SLEEPING* BEAUTY OF THE HAYMARKET.
The story of the Sleeping Beauty has just been revived at Her

INVITATION TO THE MAY MEETING.
Air.—" Spanish Danes."

Majesty s Theatre, with all its startling and brilliant effects The >Tls the sweet month of M ]ove the Saints are &n b
following is a brief sketch of the plot. Once upon a time there lived a Th h th flee frQm th/play love the opera and
King of Music and a Queen of Dance, who were blessed with a love.y ; Th as tMs f8 Qur ge d^ibou £now / r'eas0Q
daughter named Italian Opera. They occupied a splendid palace m the j That shoujd hinder our meeti at Exeter Hall ?
Haymarket, and invited all the taste, and all the talent, all the wealth,, Be thou sure to be th { and r win { {
rank, and fashion of the land to their abode Nothing could be inore i To tbe tals ri ht ear] tfa' CQmi to b*d '
brilliant and successful than the entertainment provided, but somehow In order to find th and ^ cfoge behind th '
or other an unpleasant old hag, named Discord, managed to creep in, If i may not attain to a seat b th side_
and being filled with envy at the harmony that prevailed, disturbed it
by prophesying that " Opera should get wounded in her right hand,
and fall dead." It happened that Punch, who had always loved Opera,
and often been to see her in her beautiful home, was among the guests,

How sweet it will be, love, together with thee, love,
To hear our McGhee, love, and list our M'Neill ;
When Stowell shalL charm us, and Tresham Gregg warm us,

and though he could not entirely remove the evil that had been pre-1 What joyful emotions will over us steal!
dieted, he was able to apply some remedy against the decree of Oh! I would far sooner with Thee, and with Spooner,
Discord, and said, "It shall not prove death, but only sleep, that shall . Enjoy one May morning of heartfelt delight,
fall upon our favourite." Than have my ears riuging with all the fine singing
Every care was taken, and everything that liberality or ingenuity ' Of Popish performers a whole summer's night,
could suggest was adopted to preserve Opera in her splendid abode;! , , , A , , ,
but one day some of those to whom she had always been very kind ! Ah> s^ .th™ " ™mply, ° C' d^0t H*7' l°™
and who had made their names and their fortunes in her service, wen^ ! ^°,r fief 1 nha11 GT^,love? ™ ^ ' v i
away from her, and left her to take care of herself as best she could, i W^ da/. sha11 we « ]°ve " fe™ ar,e, mf * y°u know> love
Sbe'was a little hurt by what she thought the ingratitude of those who | A^Ml8?,11°K ' ? * "f ♦ u ' \ 1 / f
had run away from her, but she kept°up her spirits bravely for a long ^J^S^^S^L somXiW certaLTo please
time. One day, however, Discord paid another visit, carrying with j p \ u"^.SffiS^S
her an instrument of a strange kind, which seemed to be a sort of *%m a tale ?* e,xcurM011 lor lrlstl conversion,
spinning machine, capable of spinning the very longest yarns. " What | r° a Preacher 8 experience among the Eee3ees.
is that ? " said Opera, innocently. " It's a very powerful instrument," j There '11 be plenty of fun, love, the serious pun, love,
said Discord; "would you like to try what you can do with it?"| The joke against Wiseman, the fling at the Pope ;
" I don't much like the look of it," said Opera. " But," said Discord,
"it used to be a machine employed a great deal in this palace, though
it's not been used now for many years." "But what is it?" said
Opera; and, taking it up as she spoke, she found she had caught hold
of a dangerous instrument called Litigation, which cuts, not only both
ways, but all way3 together. She had no sooner touched it than she
cut her fingers, and she instantly dropped into a sleep so deep that she
was to all appearance dead. This sleep gradually extended itself to all
the establishment. Tbe ladies, some of whom had been singing,
and others dancing, the musicians who had been playing, and all the
numerous officers of the magnificent household, became entranced. A
thorny hedge, planted by the hands of Discord, sprung up around the
palace, which became the centre of all sorts of intricate brambles, in
which the deadly tree called Chancery, with its bitter fruits, was a
conspicuous object.
The story of the Sleeping Beauty was reported with all kinds of
exaggerations; and many peopL were anxious to penetrate into the

----tF--- O---~--- ----7 ~-- <—>
For good imitations the poor heathen nations,
In pious orations, will furnish great scope.
Then about Ragged Schools, love, some speakers, no fools, love,
Be tbou sure will have much that's amusiDg to say.
The Suppression of Vice, love, will also be nice, love,
And the playful Teetotallers talking away.
Scripture Headers will make, love, our sides also shake, love,
With the stories they'll tell of their tours in the slums ;
And the Soup Institution, and Tract Distribution,
By light elocution collect heavy sums.
There's many a joker that wears a white choker,
There's many a wag iu apparel of black ;
There are some missionaries as frolic as fairies,
In sportive vagaries, neat jests who can crack.
We shall hear much of pathos, and somewhat of bathos,

cAdggsiauuii ; *uu many peup^ were uuuuua iu peue^ue uiwi uie fi fc whateyer the etch it wiJ1 tickie our ears;
mysteries ot the^palace, to see whether what they had heard was true. Wg ^ rQW be affr^hted; and then be deliguted,
Now in concert shall smile, and then mingle our tears.

Some said that the charming Opera had been eaten up by rats; others
declared she had been drowned by the water coming in at the ceiling;
but this was contradicted by an odd Fish who had always been kept
near the spot, and who said that no more water was about the place than
he required for himself. While some said that, everything was ruined by
wet, others declared it was tumbling to pieces from being too dry ; and
souie maintained stoutly that a party of moths had taken possession,
and swallowed several thousand yards of satin damask, together with a
few hundred chair-cushions, and other articles of upholstery which the
palace was known to have contained. After a few years, a gallant
Knight who had been waiting patiently for a turn of fortune, deter-
mined to throw open the enclosure, for he felt that the time had arrived
for Opera to awaken. He first cut away the thorny hedge that sur-
rounded the palace, and going quietly about his great task, he touched
the Sleeping Opera with his talisman, which he always carries about with
Mm, and which contains the secret of success. Opera at once opened

Say yea, then, say yea, love; remember 'tis May, love,
'Tis the month to his mate when the cuckoo doth call;
'Tis the season for cooing and billing and wooing :
'Tis the season for meetings in Exeter Hall.

POEM BY A PERFECTLY FURIOUS ACADEMICIAN.

I takes and paints,
Hears no complaints,
And sells before I'm dry;
Till savage Rtjskin
He sticks his tusk in,
Then nobody will buy.
heT'eyes" and the^aiknTKnight ttmmb^"the ^^0^ palace" N-B- Confouild Ru9KIN i only that wont come iut0 the ^~hat u's true'
An eager crowd rushed in on every side, who to their delight and -
astonishment found everything stirring with activity, just as it had
been in operation when the sleep fell upon it years ago. Not only was The Dispensing Power.
Opera herself as delightful and attractive as ever, but her younger | Mr p0NCH presents his compliments to Mr. Bowyer, and having
sister, Ballet, who had been almost forgotten, was more charming, if bggn muc]i ^^ested by the discussion which Mr. Bowyer has heen
possible, than she had ever been before. Not only were all the atten- carndri„ on wdh j\^K Drxjmmond with respect to the dispensing po*er
dants, and all the officers and servants restored to animation, as if by Qf {he Pope be°-s to ask him, whether he is of opinion that His
the hand of an enchanter; but, all the elegant draperies which were Holiness can'dispense with the services of the French and Austrian
said to have been swallowed by the moths, and all the rich decorations trO0TJS a
of the Palace of Opera which were declared to have become food for ^ —--
imaginary rats, were found as fresh and beautiful as they had been owen's millennium.
when they were first displayed. Of course, everybody congratulated ' j »r-n
everybody else, and especially the gallant Knight, who has fairly won We have been requested to state, that Mr Owen sMil enmuuicorn-
Opera as his own. He is now preparing a series of brilliant entertain- menced, according to the proceedings at St. Martin s Hall, on Monday
ments in celebration of the happy event, which his skill and courage week. Henceforth, bad money will be taken all over the world, and
have brought about; and we hope that some future chronicler will have no questions asked. _
to finish this story in the usual fairy-tale fashion, by intimating that
" Opera and her Champion were permanently united, and lived happily 1\/[USICAL.—AN ORPHEUS WANTED to repeat his celebrated
and prosperously together for many years." 1*1 music to Mr. Baines. His expenses will be paid to Leeds.