Punch (35.1858)

August 21, 1858.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 73

"HEAREB AND DEARER."—THE SUB ATLANTIC SPLICE.

England and Ame-
rica have long been
held together by the
friendliest of ties,
and they have lately
been united in the
closest of relation-
ships. "Nearer and
dearer" are they
now than ever. The
Sub-Atlantic wire
is the wedding-ring
which joins them.
The splice under
the Ocean may be
deemed their nup-
tial knot.

The union has
long been ardently
desired, and it has
at length been hap-
pily accomplished.
There were many

and great obstacles which had to be surmounted. The course of love as usual did
not run quite smoothly; and several mishaps occurred by which the wedding (or
the welding) was from time to time put off. In fact it long seemed doubtful
if the splice could be effected; and when no less than three distinct ruptures had
occurred, the croakers all agreed that the connection had quite ceased, and that
the match was broken off. Perseverance has, however, been triumphantly

rewarded: and in spite of every difficulty the union has afc
length been successfully accomplished.

It may be judged that the ceremony was of no common
order, when we state that it took moie than six days to
get through it. But, although the performance of it occu-
pied so long, it still took every one by surprise to learn
that it was finished. The Papers give the names of the
persons who officiated; but the list requires amendment,
as it contains no mention of the Rev. Mr. Punch. Thn
Rev. Mr. Punch was (if not in flesh, in spirit) present at the
ceremony, and saw in his mind's eye every inch of its per-
formance. Mentally, though not manually, he assisted at
the service ; helping those engaged in it with his heartiest
encouragement. At the conclusion of the ceremony the
Rev. Gent no longer could control his feelings; and regard-
less of his reverendship, he gave way to his emotion in such
a burst of cheering as might have easily been heard on the
other side of the Atlantic. He understands it was dis-
tinctly audible at Cherbourg, in spite of all the cannonade
which there was raised to drown it. Having then pro-
nounced a benediction on the work, the Rev. Gent dis-
charged a volley of old shoes, and drank six bumpers of
champagne to the prosperity and welfare of the united
happy couple.

The ceremony being finished, the two nations now are
one; joined for better and for worse, and. it is thought,
for better far more than for worse. Wedded to each
other, they have both henceforward unity of interest, and
must go hand in hand in all they undertake. May their
Union be lasting, as it is complete ! May no divorce act
ever separate those who 're now united by the Snh-
Atlantic Splice !

Is it glorious exemplar, or terrible warning
Dead bronze Uncle to living bronze Nephew supplies ?

Stands he there, our Time's Lucifer, Son of the Morning,
To deter by his fall, or inspire by his rise P

If bronze had a voice, from those lips monumental
Who can tell us what Sibylline promptings would fall P

If to realisation of dreams Oriental,
Grasping empire to which Alexander's was small P

Or to knock with armed hand, once again, at the portal
Of Asia, Sphinx-guarded, and moated by Nile ?

To call down the Pyramid's mem'ries immortal
On a new Gallic conquest of Egypt to smile ?

Or all Europe to tame P or that island to humble,
Where pigmy Britannia, sea-throned, holds her sway

That island which saw the Colossus slow crumble
Erom forehead of iron to ancles of clay.

That island, whose ancientest glories are written

THE SPEECH OF THE STATUE. DANGEROUS BOYS.

(August the 8th.) Tub Times, the other day, proposed the removal of the Bluecoa«

i - i -i . i , School from the sulphuretted hydrogen of Newgate Street to the

Cm the broad quay at Cherbourg m bronze he stands mounted, of the country. yerv g00Jd . but what wiil the COuntry-peopie

Arm outstretched-ringer pomted-not seawards, they say ; to that ? Wnenever the Bluecoat scholars are taken out for a walk

Bareheaded, mid bayonets and cannon uncounted, on the turnpike-road their extraordinary dress will frighten all the

There Nephew does homage to Uncle to-day. horses> In the Londou streetSj those animals, as is well known, are

subdued by the noise and bustle, so that they do not start and shy at
fearful objects, such as the Christ's Hospital scholars, who are occa-
sionally seen running about bareheaded, in their blue gaberdines and
yellow stockings. But in the country every horse will bolt at the sight
of such alarming figures, and the bulls will be sure to charge at the
boys' legs. If Christ's Hospital is removed into the country, it will be
necessary to give the scholars caps which they can wear, and clothes
which will not excite the derision of mankind, the fear of horses, and
the animosity of horned cattle.

According to a Mr. Edward Tudor Scargill, who seems to be a
great admirer of the existing order of things, position inclusive, of
Christ's Hospital, the health of the boys there is " remarkably good."
If this is the case, the sanitary state of the school has much improved.
It used to be greatly, if not principally, celebrated for the ringworm,
and perhaps afforded more opportunities for the observation of that
disease than the neighbouring hospital of St. Bartholomew. Injuries
of the feet, also, by reason that the scholars had to scramble for shoes,
which, having been cleaned, used to be tossed together in a heap, and
also because the shoes were ill cobbled, were, we believe, not unknown.
These evils may have ceased to exist, and the Bluecoat boys may now
At Cressy and Poitiers, in Prance's best blood : no longer be rendered unhealthy or uncomfortable, but only made to

That small, slow, untiring, untamed, bull-dog Britain, look ridiculous. That, however, is quite bad enough, and will be too

Whose four feet though you sever, his grip he'll make good. j bad if they are transferred to the rural districts, where they will be
Tf n , , , f „ . ,,. . ... . continually causing riders to be thrown and vehicles to be capsized or

It that bronze breathe ot Britain, tis words of dissuasion, kicked to pieces

Not of prompting to strike, that those lips should convey; -
'Tis the tale of long-planned, ever-baffled invasion,
Of Aboukir, the Nile, and Trafalgar's red bay; A GREAT HARDSHIP.

Of hearts that ne'er quailed at a bulletin's swelling tone; The Mersey stuck fast " with Zeviathan-like obstinacy " on the first

Of pluck by defeat that to conquest up grew ; day that they attempted to launch her. The description of the failure

Of chieftains from Burrard advancing to Wellington ; says:—

Por starting-point Walch'ren,-for goal Waterloo. j T^eTe te little doubt there is nofc. cant, enough for the ,es8el to slide down the

Yes, ponder the lesson, "Beware of Great Britain : " wayB'

Such thy bronze Uncle's voice as he frowns o'er the quay: I This neglect is too bad, when the Derby Government have such a
These the words, all unseen, yet in adamant written ! large stock of it on hand. Por instance, a little of the "cant" that

On the statue at Cherbourg that turns from the sea. [ was indulged in so bountifully about the Jews unchristianising the

House of Commons might have been advantageously applied to this
= purpose; or why not have invited the Bishop of Oxford to have

volunteered his valuable services ? A few oily words from Soapy Sam,
a call of the house. an(^ tne orjStac]e would have been removed in a minute. In any

We think it was Mr. Roebuck, who, on board the Pera, amused i talking-match, we will back his Saponaceous Reverence to win in a
himself by calling out to the Steward, " Here, Chiltern Hundreds !" | cant-er.