Punch (35.1858)

Decembke 25, 1858. j

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

255

INSECTS AND THEIR OBSERVERS.

ntomology in Sport, and En-
tomology in Earnest. Such
is the title of a lately
published work by the
Hon. Mrs. W. and
Lady B. One ento-
mology may sometimes
run into the other.
Studying the habits and
manners of bees may be
entomology in sport; but
suppose you upset the
hive, then it becomes
entomology in earnest.
Entomology is very good
tun so long as it is
purely objective ; but
subjective entomology is
a serious matter, and
keeps many an unhappy
victim awake all night.
A subjective entomolo-
gist is a person with
whom it is advisable to
avoid contact.

A REAL SCOTCH
GRIEVANCE.

Let nobody say that
we are disposed to make
light of a genuine Scot-
tish grievance. There is
one of which our Scotch
friends have really good
reason to complain; and
we have much pleasure in calling attention to it just now. It is, in fact, a
grievance of annual occurrence; and this is the time when it comes round.
For about a fortnight before Christmas, the inhabitants of London and the neigh-

bourhood are wont to be awakened at midnight or some
time after, by a noise of brass bands, which go about
playing polkas, waltzes, and nigger-melodies, in celebration
of the hallowed season at hand.

But where are the bag-pipes ? Shall English brazen
serpent-blowers and trumpeters monopolise the privilege
of disturbing our sweet slumbers, and subsequently call to
demand remuneration for affording us that pleasure ? Is
our rest to be broken or prevented by the Traviata Galop,
and not by Johnnie Cope, a much more appropriate air for
the purpose ? Have the police orders to take up all the
pipers, and leave all the other sleep-murdering musicians
alone ? If that is the case, it is very hard upon the Scotch;
and the injustice is the more unkind as emanating from
Scotland-Yard.

"THERE'S A GOOD TIME COMING, BOYS!"

Of all the Christmas Waits this season, we have not
seen a body of such ancient and well-established ones as
those mustered and turned out by the Birmingham Reform
Association.

These Christmas Waits include:—

Administrative Reform.

Readjustment of Property and Incorue-Tax.

The Abolition of Excise Duties.

The Suppression of Pauperism, Seduction, and Profligacy.

Revision of the Statute Law.

Complete Change of the Bankruptcy Law.

And, Pacilities for Transfer of Real Estate.

Brayvo, Birmingham!

" Such are a few" modestly says the Association, " of
the questions which will occupy the attention of the House
of Commons, as soon as that House represents the national
will."

It strikes Mr. Punch forcibly, that that House must
represent the national wisdom as well as the national
will, before it achieves the solution of a few, even, of these
few questions.

But, if the House of Commons of the future is to do a
tithe of the work here cut out for it, it will indeed deserve
the title of " The Bright House of Commons."

PEGASUS IN THE CIRCUS.

The maxim that "good wine needs no bush," it appears, has not
much influenced the writer of the following: which, merely altering
the names, we copy from the columns of a country print:—

rpHE KOYAL MAMMOTH CIRCUS.—Messes Dash beg to state that
the different departments for the visitors, will be found to have all the comforts
necessary to make an Evening's Amusement one of pleasure and enjoyment. The
interior at first sight has a pleasing and novel effect, the costly chandeliers with
countless numbers of glittering jets conveying to the mind thoughts of Alladin's
Palace, manufactured by Mr. Blank. The sound and substantial manner the
edifice is constructed by Mr. Stars, and the elegance of the boxes, being coveied
with rich drapery and elegant carpeting, affords an oppori unity of witnessing the
evening's amusements with all the ease and comfort of Drawing-room Entertainment.
Tne building erected under the superintendence of Ms. Asterisk, Architect. Ac.

The accommodation of this Leviathan Temple, and the Elegance of its Appoint-
ments, are of the most Stupendous and Elaborate Kind, and stand without a
parallel in the Equestrian Annals. An Unexampled Array of

EQUESTRIAN. GYMNASTIC, AND ACROBATIC TALENT,
Embracing a full and efficient", Corps for the production of Historical Spectacles,
Magnificent Pageants, Gorgeous Processions, and Antipodean Grandeur, unique,
interesting, novel, and effective realisations of the Poets' imaginations.

FIFTY MALE AND FEMALE ARTISTES.
Mirth Provoking Clowns, who dispense Wit without Vulgarity.
Stud of Sixty Horses and Lilliputian Ponies.
The Appointments and Costumes will exceed every effort hitherto presented to the

Public.

GRAND DAY SOIREES EVERY FRIDAY,
At Two o'Clock, by Gaslight, in every respect equal to Night.

There is a grandiloquence about this composition which reminds us
of the language which George Robins used to revel in; and we
incline to think his mantle has descended on the writer. We do not
know if the composers of equestrian advertisements receive payment
in proportion to the largeness of their phrases ; but if they do, we
think the gentleman who concocted the above must derive a handsome
income from his post of penmanship. We have noticed more than
once that every Circus Company is, according to its posters, the very
best one extant; but when we find one "standing without a parallel in
the equestrian annals," we are prepared for something even better
than the best, and feel that no superlatives could do it proper justice.

Believers as we are in t he Arabian Nights, the bare announcement
that this Circus would "convey to our mind thoughts of Alladm's
Palace" would be sufficient of itseif to make us go and pay a visit

there: notwithstanding we feel puzzled by the spelling of Aladdin
with two l's and one d, and by the statement that his palace was
" manufoctuied by Mr. Blank," whereas we thought it was con-
structed by the Genie of the Lamp. We feel somewhat perplexed too by
the junction of the words "Antipodean grandeur." What peculiar sort
of grandeur is Antipodean grandeur? Australia is famous for a great
number of things, but we have never before heard of grandeur being
one of them. We thought our grand folks, when they emigrated
there, left their grandeur here behind them.

Omne obscurum pro magnifico, as an M.P. on his legs would not omit
to say. We accept what is obscure to us as something wonderfully
fine; and as we don't know what it means, we think it must be some-
thing preteinaturally splendid. A climax is, however, put to our
bepuzzlement by the statement of there being " grand day Soirees
every Eriday " at this palace of enchantment, poetry and horseflesh.
In making this announcement Pegasus, we fear, has let his fancy run
away with him. Giving a day soiree must be literally turning night
into day; a feat of conjuring more often spoken of than witnessed.
We can only liken it to the making of "hot ice and wonderous strange
snow." Paragons as they are, we rather apprehend that the " mirth
provoking clowns," do not very often make a richer joke than this.
Paragons we say they are, for Paragons they must be, seeing that
they "dispense wit, without vulgarity;" in which respect they clearly
are plagiarists of Punch.

How to Stay the Passport Plague.

The Times says, that " it is asserted, on the highest authority, that
the passport system is only kept up because it maintains some thousand
poor fellows, who would otherwise have to sweep the streets for their
bread." This being so, could not British Travellers, comprising so
many of both the mercantile and fashionable worlds, subscribe enough
money to buy up the interest of the French passport officials in their
several offices ? Why, surely the members of the Travellers' Club
alone could do it, if they would all club together.

A Reason against the Eniteld Gun-factory.—Surely it «3
supeifluous, when the Government offices already produce such an
enormous number of smooth bores.