Punch: Punch (75.1878)

16

PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

[July 20, 1878.

Mr. Butt spoke with bated breath in support of inquiry, and com-
mentedon the absence of every one of tbe ex-Ministers who were
responsible for the Bill. The motion for inquiry was negatived by
184 to 67.

Wednesday.—The stout and smiling' Member for Rochdale—a
Potter handling' Conservative clay that declines to be moulded-
moved his brief Bill for distribution of land left undistributed by
mil, as personalty is distributed, with due regard to the rights of
widow and children.

This is so obviously sound sense and justice, that it may be safely
set down as one of trie changes for the better that must come. It is
needless to say that, en attendant, the Conservative back of the
House is set up against it. Mr. Gregory opposes the Bill as a
lawyer. Alter a rule whose roots he deep in the feudal system!
It is too great a shock to the legal mind. En revanche, Mr. Leeman,

Meanwhile we keep our shooting eye open, and let no ex{)eriment
escape us.

Lord Cottesloe wants to know whether the Board of Trade can
or will make the Railway Companies reform the passenger-traps
which they call platforms.

Lord Henniker said the Board of Trade had taken steps. Un-
fortunately, though the Board take steps, the Companies won't make
them.

[Commons.)—Mr. Sclater-Booth says the Rivers Pollution Act

is in active operation. Mr. Lowther gives the same assurance as to

the Artizans' Dwellings Act in Ireland; in fact, Paddy is getting

more good of the Act than either John Bull or Sawney Scott.

Highways Bill cheered through Committee. One bit of practical

work scored to the credit of the Session.

In Committee on Admiralty and War-Office Clerks Bill, Mr.

Parnell made himself the organ of the Supplementarv Clerks, who
lawyer too, but advanced Reformer, ls prepared to swallow the , are like to be hardly dealt with under it# f>unch is lad th haye

change ; even advocates it. Mr. Wheelhouse uttered, with almost | found a friend though he regrets it is not one more likely to be
comical naivete, his holy horror of touching rights m real estate ; likened to.

which were almost, if not wholly, inalienable,

Mr. Suaw-Leeeyre, Mr. Fawcett, and Sir W. Harcourt, dealt
hard blows for the Bill, lawyers as they all three are, and two of
them professors to boot, speaking boldly out and up for common
sense and justice.

Colonel Stanley and Mr. Smith pleaded the usual plea—good of
the public service the rule, hardship to individuals the exception.
Blessed are the martyrs who are offered up to the public interest!
Of course it is the men without friends that go to the wall. Their
state is the more gracious, if they would only see it. But War-

The Division 193 to 1d7 foreshadowed the future triumph of the j office aild Admiralty Clerks, we fear, are a selfish lot. They don't
Bill. Let the Honourable Member for Rochdale keep pegging away, like to be sacrificed to the public interests.

or rather pottering on ! Mr_ Mitchell-Henry, after an attempt at a count, reopened the

case of McCarthy, the Fenian convict, who, having heart disease,
died twelve davs after his release, under the excitement caused by
a public reception from the Dublin crowd.

The jury found his death had been hastened by his treatment in
prison. Sir James Ingham, one of the most experienced and re-
spected of the Metropolitan Police Magistrates, was directed to make
an inquiry, as tbe result of which he exculpated the prison autho-
rities from all blame. We would rather trust the impartiality of a
calm and judiciaUy-niinded inquirer than the sympathy of pas-
sionate partisans, and so cannot regret that Mr. Henry's motion was
negatived by 101 to 35.

As we began our work by bowing in a Convention, let us end it
by bowing out a Congress. The Treaty of San Stefano was signed
on Saturday July 13, at 3 in the afternoon. It leaves everybody dis-
satisfied, and sows as many seeds of war as it includes Articles.

Thursday (Lords).—Lord Stanley of Alderley spoke at length
from his brief in the case of the succession to the Jaghire of Bun-
gana-Pally—evidently a proceeding in error. The motion should
have been made before the Privy Council.

Lord Shaetesbury wants to know if the Government, on occupy-
ing^ Cyprus, means to suppress Slavery there.

The Duke of Richmond not knowing could not say. Till Sir
Garnet Wolseley has reportedon the island, Government prefers
to leave others where it is itself, in the dark.

" Is there a harbour in the island ? " asks Lord Granville. That,
at least, Government might be expected to know.

"No harbour," the Duke believed, "but several nice open road-
steads," rather exposed, perhaps, but roomy, decidedly roomy.

(Commo7is.)—The Chancellor of the Exchequer, whom the
House cheered heartily on his reappearance with no trace of his
broken head, was bombarded with questions about Cyprus, which he
was no more able to answer than the President of the Council.

But Colonel Stanley does know that the occupying force will be
10,000 men, 7000 Indian, and the balance English regiments.

And John Bull—Punch may safely add—will soon know the
way the money goes, in paying for them'and other " incidentals."

Mr. egerton told Sir A. Gordon that a Map of Cyprus has been
hung in the news-room, so Parliament will soon know as much about
the island as the Government. There is a shilling pamphlet out
already, Punch is happy to see. Meanwhile he is deep himself in the
biography of Katherine Cornaro, selected by Jacques Lusignan,
the King of Cyprus, in 1468, from all the assembled beauties of
the Book of Gold, for his Oueen, adopted and dowered by the Senate,
painted byJTitian; and afterwards, in her widowhood, ousted

PHRASES FOR TRAVELLERS.

(To be Translated into Spa?iish.)

by the Sea-Republic. Into whose embroidered shoes, ol purple /JFll^ ^ W^*" st^ j do not to be dis-

samite and gold, Victoria now steps, after almost four hundred Ji^turbed during the night, here,

Lord Salisbury is sending over a picture of the South-East as new- vll^PCCv^S ^Will ^ou^kinctlv °ln!OTm3Xthe

limned by the Congress ; two large copies to hang m the Library, ^ * \>jA Brigand Chief that I am tra-

and small ones to be distributed among Members. |x \ fifing for health, and that my

Mr Bourke and Mr. Forster exchanged ideas about Slavery- K J|gJ \ doetore has enjoined absence of

which Government will do its best to discourage m the East, the Hf\ A excitement

Porte having already expressed its willingness to enter into a Con- \|| \ Will voii inform him that if

vention to stop the trade in slaves. 1 ¥ he has to shoot any one, I shall

What undertaking won tit enter into? J J {//i be greatly obliged to him if he

Promising is so easy, and performance so hard to enforce. jfS^ V \( \i I will use an air-gun.

Government—sign of the approaching end of the Session—means l|S|^ \ m Vl t„ >\ p„„ii„' flp^nr p.nVnnrl T think

to take all the Wednesdays, and all the Tuesdays after next.

Even with that impending, the slaughter of the Innocents will be
a bloody one.

Lastly came the regular wrangle over the Irish Sunday Closing
Bill, brought to a close at the scandalously early hour of ten minutes
after three, when Mr. Onslow's Amendment for reading the Bill
that day six months was disposed of by 166 to 55.

This promises to be the one Irish Bill of the Session, and it's a
bad 'un. The exclusion of the great Irish towns from the measure
of itself reduces it to an absurdity.

Friday (Lords).—Lord Truro opened fire on the Vivisection Com-
mission and its conclusions. His Lordship runs Wilde on the sub-
ject, and makes himseH the mouthpiece of a prejudice as passionate
as his own.

The old, old question of the big and little Endians, Muzzle v. Breech-
loader, was up again. Muzzle still holds its own at the War-Office.

ai

ill you please give me a
ilway ticket to Madrid.
Can I have a rifle-proof
coupe ?

At what part of the country
does the train usually stop for
interviewing the brigands ?

Are chain-armour railway rugs
to be obtained at the newspaper

after the messages I have sent
to you by the guard, you might
have left me alone.

What! you killed the guard
before he had time to deliver
my messages ! Surely that was impolitic.

As you have taken my watch, my purse, all 'my boxes, my great
coat, my umbrella, and my hat, I think you might let me retain my
boots.

If you shoot me, I will write to the Times.

If you ill-treat me any further, I really shall be obliged to call for
the police. . , ,

Surely, as you will not be able to use it, you might give me back
mv railway-ticket. ,

What! you do not allow trains to go faster than this ! lhen how
am I to get to Madrid ?