Punch: Punch (75.1878)

August 10, 1878.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 59

ADVANCE. AUSTRALIA !"

"They are coming up, Master,'
ment, " the entire Eleven."

" They are heartily welcome," replied Mr. Punch, with one of his
most graceful bows as the Ambassadors from the Antipodes, with
Spofforth, Boyd, and the Bankeeman Brothers at their head,
entered the sanctum.

"Be seated, my dear boys," exclaimed Mr. Punch, cordially.

The eleven sunburnt heroes looked at one another and smiled.

""We will sit down_with pleasure," said the spokesman, "but
our favourite practice is to make a stand. You should see us at
Lord's."

" I have seen you both at Lords and Commons," returned Mr.
Punch, with enthusiasm. "I have seen you North, South, East,
and "West; I have seen you all round. A splendid team! Australia
may well be proud of you, and England too, as branches of the
British willow, though grown at the Antipodes."

" H'm, I don't know," answered the spokesman ; " we are pretty
well. But there are lots as good or better where we come from.
Still, I think that we have given you a fair taste of the Cornstalk."

" Before or behind the wickets, in the field,—everywhere,—as the
artfullest of bowlers or the best of bats,—you are simply magnifi-
cent!"

"Oh no, we are not," continued the spokesman, with modest
pride. " As you may have seen by reading the report of the speeches
at the dinner the other night, we don't consider ourselves by any
means the top-twigs of the Australian willow. But, as 1 say,
we are pretty well, and quite equal to teaching our grandmother—
if not your own Alma Mater—a thing or two."

'' Ah ! Cambridge v;as rather too much for you, but think what an

Eleven 'it was! You should have tackled them at the beginning
instead of the end of your campaign. But never mind that Don't
be put out," said Mr. Punch, good-naturedly.

We never are, except after a long innings," returned the spokes-
man. " Still, we don't think you quite understand us. Now, Sir, you
are certainly the best informed man in the Old Country."

" Undoubtedly," replied Mr. Punch, who never flinches from the
truth.

"Well, Sir, what do you know about Australia? Now don't
look it out in the Enci/clopcedia Britannica, but tell us off-hand."

" Australia is a magnificent country," returned Mr. Punch, with
enthusiasm. Then he added, with a little hesitation, "and it's
famous for all sorts of things."

" What things ? "

"Oh, gold, and Australian beef, and kangaroos—and 'possums,
wombats, and ornithorhyncusses, black swans, black fellows, and
bush-rangers, and-" then Mr. Punch came to a full stop.

" I thought so," said the spokesman, with a smile, "your ideas
about Australia are of the most Zoological-Cardenish character.
Are you aware, Sir, that our cities are full of magnificent buildings ?
Are you aware, Sir, that trade and commerce are nowhere more pros-
perous than they are in our quarter of the globe ? Are you aware,
Sir, that with us all the learned professions are represented by the
ablest men, and that our Public Schools and Universities (are pat-