Punch: Punch (75.1878)

October 19, 1878.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. 171

MEDICAL REMUNERATION.

Doctor. " TJai ! Most insolent!" (To his Wife.) "Listen to this, my Dear." (Reads Letter aloud.) "'Sir,—I enclose a
P. 0. Order for Thirteen Shillings and Sixpence, hoping it will do you as little Good as your two very small Bottles
of "Physic" did me.'"

"Yery well, Sir," replied the man with the belt. " Personal
responsibility won't hurt any of us so long as we do our duty. I
feel much more comfortable now that I know I have a remedy against
the Signalman if I come to grief through his culpable carelessness."

And Mr. Punch walked on until he reached a box full of tele-
graph-discs. A lively, bright-eyed official was in charge.

' I suppose you have just come on duty ? " hinted Mr. Punch.

" Just going off, you mean, Sir," replied the Signalman, cheerily.
" Yes, Sir ; since the new Act's become law, we have a fair amount
of sleep and work."

"Dear me! . Why?"

" Because the Station-master is directly responsible to us, Sir. If
we make any mistake through over-work, we can look to him. But
pardon me, Sir, I have to attend to my discs. A train is just due,
and here it comes, exact to a minute."

" You keep punctual time ? "

" We are obliged, Sir, since we are all directly responsible."
Mr. Punch, well pleased with what he had seen and heard, walked
on to the Station. He found its Master smiling.
" Everything right ? "

" Everything, thank you. Sir. Now that we have direct personal
responsibility, it's perfectly wonderful how smoothly everything
goes."

" No accidents, eh ? "

" Accidents, Sir ! Why, we have almost forgotten what they are !
How can we have accidents, when the Traffic-manager is responsible
to the Station-master for the proper timing of all the trains ? With
punctuality, we know where we are, Sir. Working a line now is as
easy as A B C."

Suddenly Mr. Punch found himself transported to a comfortably
furnished office, in which an Elderly Gentleman was busily engaged
in the direction of a numerous staff of employes.

" Glad to see you, Sir," said the Elderly Gentleman, who immedi-
ately recognised his august visitor; " but I am sure you will pardon
me if I give my undivided attention to the work before me. A
very heavy responsibility sits upon me, Mr. Punch—& very heavy
responsibility indeed."

"And you are not over-worked, Mr. Traffic-manager ? "

"Certainly not, Mr. Punch. The Directors are personally
responsible to me. If I were over-worked, they would be the
sufferers. Since the new Act, no one can shirk his duties. And
now good-bye."

Mr. Punch took the hint, and withdrew. Again suddenly he
found himself in another room, in which a number of excited and
portly persons were engaged in a most animated conversation. They
rushed up to Mr. Punch as he entered, and overpowered him with
questions.

"Is the Traffic-manager looking after the trains ? " asked one.
"Are the Station-masters telegrajjhing to the Signalmen ? " said
another.

"Are the Guards obeying the signals '? " cried a third.
'' Are the Engine-drivers looking after the Plate-layers ? " shouted
a fourth.

"Stop, stop!" exclaimed Mr. Punch. "Pray tell me why are
you so interested in these matters ? "

"Because," they cried in angry unison, "we are responsible to
everybody—not only to our employes, but to the Public, and the
Law as well. It is shameful, scandalous, disgraceful! "

" I suppose you are-"

"Directors!" they shouted. "Fancy making Directors respon-
sible ! "

" I suppose the new Act-"

But here Mr. Punch was interrupted by an absolute shriek of
rage. The noise (which turned out to be the braying of some
donkeys) woke him, and he found, as he looked once more at the
running river, that the visions he had seen were merely the shadows
of a pleasant dream. May those shadows have coming events to
follow them !

"le spectre rouge."

Herr Fran:eenstein, in the German Parliament, as spokesman
for the Centre, proclaims opposition to the Anti-Socialist Bill.
Naturally, Frankenstein has had enough of making monsters.