Punch (72.1877)

298 PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. [June 30, 1877.

IN SUMMER-SHOWERY TIME,

(1) When you are Walking, and the (>) If a Friend shelters under your (3) You will both get Wet. Thekefore-

summer shed3 hkr tears, umbrella,

(4) Bide tour Time, and presently call to you (5) Another Friend ; when— (6) Your Two Friends will get Wet, but you will keep Dry !

[ Verbum sap. sat.

a magazine, they had better first talk it over with three or four
practical and experienced men—two Managers and two Dramatic
Authors—and so obtain some knowledge of what they have taken
upon themselves to prattle about in this present month of the Nine-
teenth Century. I see that Me. Lessee has already quitted us. I
salute you, Miss Muef. Good evening, Mistee Noddy !

Striking.

These is no attraction for a "Woman now-a-days, after her glass,
so powerful as the box-seat of a coach. The members of the Four-
in-Hand and Coaching Clubs are literally besieged by beauties
demanding, as a right, to sit well in front. As a rule, the beauty
gets what she wants. In the marriageable world every girl who
knows who's who and what's what now looks forward to a coach
with her husband that is to be. As knowing Mes. Beyant tersely
puts it, " my May is a Match that will only light upon the Box."

"To Parents and Guardians."

This, from a late Number of the Times, is, at least, candid :—

EXCHANGE.—A Clergyman, near London, who PREPARES for the
ARMY, will take a Youth in exchange for his Daughter (22).

JUSTICE BY MACHINERY.

It is not, perhaps, generally known that there has been intro-
duced into Parliament a Measure entitled the Thrashing Machines
Bill. This project of legislation is limited to the sphere of agricul-
ture, but its application might be extended to penal discipline and
education. At present, flogging is a very unequal punishment. It
varies with the strength and vigour of the executioner's arm. So
when schoolboys are whipped or caned for misconduct, neglect, or
inability to learn their lessons. Surely there are many engineers
and mechanics who would have no difficulty in constructing Thrash-
ing Machines adapted to lay on the cat, the rod, or the cane with a
just uniformity. Once constructed, will Me. P. Tayloe allow
Punch to suggest that a comprehensive Prisons Bill should contain
the necessary provisions for their general introduction into our gaol
machinery.

" The Priest in Absolution,"

By a much-needed application of soap-and-water to his dirt,
will become "The Priest in Ablution;" ducked in the most convenient
horse-pond, "The Priest in Solution;" and, in relation to the
Church, he brings into contempt " The Priest in Dissolution—of the
Establishment."