Punch: Punch (89.1885)

August 1, 1885.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

59

INTERIORS AND EXTERIORS. No. 15.

IN " GLADSTONE'S ROOM,"—I.E., IN THE ROOM OF GLADSTONE.

Press Gents filled his glass to the brim and.
tried the truth of his statement, and then
drunk a second to show as he thort so two.
So the day was wot I calls a purfect spessimen
of a reel good 'un, for it begun -with a good
deed and ended with a good dinner.

Ah, if most of our days was begun and
ended in the same way as that ere day, what
a different world it 'ud be! Goodness and
Kindness and Charity and Silver Trowels and
Music in the Morning, and Good Dinners and
kind short speeches and capital Songs and
Christian Horspitality in the evening. It
may be ony a dream of the cummin g Future,
but wot a dream I Robebt.

TENNYSON'S TROUBLE.

Veby graceful, no doubt, was the Laureate's
perfunctory "Wedding Present to Princess
Beatbice, who accepted it, as Her Royal
Highness took Prince Henby, for " better
and verse." But what in Heaven's name,—
in the Bidereal Heaven's name,—did he mean
by "A conjectured planet in mid Heaven
between two suns" ? Polonius, who so
highly approved of the expression " Mobled
Q,ueen," would certainly have observed,

" ' Conjectured planet' is good." But " be-
tween two suns"? Was the Poet Laureate
thinking of the lines in the Critic, about
"Two revolving suns"? Or was he only
" mooning," and not thinking of anything in
particular, except what a bore it was to be a
Poet Laureate, and compelled to turn out
machine-cut couplets to order? However,
his Lordship, the Laureate, may congratulate
himself on the fact that, if there is a " con-
jectured planet" standing like a donkey
between two bottles of hay, or like a noodle
between two stools who comes to the ground,
—we don't mind helping the troubadour to a
simile or two gratis,—and " two suns " left
for his phenomenal planet, at least there are
not two daughters left, whose weddings will
force him to mount his willing, but weary,

THE KEY OF " GLADSTONE'S
ROOM."

Toby Dog, Toby Dog,

Where have you been ?

" I've been to Gladstone's Room,"
What do you mean ?

Toby Dog, Toby Dog,

What saw you there ?

" I saw a little man in Gladstone's
chair."

Here Salisbury hollars,
" Oh, Randolph, what collars! "
But Randolph says, " Sabum,

It suits me to wear 'em."

Says Iddisleigh to Giffobd,

" We've not often differed,

Ceanbbook is weighing
What Hamilton's saying,

Duke o' Richmond you '11 find him
With Gibson behind him,

Grand Cboss is the man up,
And Stanhope will stan' up,

While listening to each
Sits Michael Hicks-Beach,

Smith, seated, looks tall
And full as a book-stall
Of knowledge priced cheap,

He's almost asleep.

They'd all smoke Havannahs
If 'twasn't for Mannebs."

So here they all met are,

And here they agree
That " Gladstone's Room's better
Than his compance."