Punch (72.1877)

Febbuary 17, 1877.] PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI.

71

CULINARY CULTURE.

New Cook. "If you 'be going up-Staibs, Mr. Ruggles, you might just tell my Lady

that if she can't write thf ' MeNOO' in french, I shall be very 'appy to do it
jfob her ! "

Sir Joshua might have painted and a Sir Moses have bought, he held that most formidable
of all his weapons, a steel pen. And who was this ?

Gentlemen, this was the man before whom all Europe in reality quailed, to whom Princes
bowed and diplomatists cajoled,—it was Dom Yicheduomo Sovebichino, the General of The
Jesuits!!

" Emissario mio," he said, suddenly, to a yellow-faced, high-cheek-boned Monk, whose
general appearance bespoke the part of the world for which he was made up, " go to China.
See the Emperor's Secretary, and give him this draught," and he held out a paper of the
deepest black, with a few characters in white on it. " Ildrafto nigro," he continued, "will
settle the constitutional question that is to give us a new empire in an old and tottering
world. Stay," he added, as the Emissary was about to withdraw, " let me look at you."

He eyed him narrowly from head to foot. Then, suddenly exhibiting tokens of dissatis-
faction, he beckoned to a stout, pale-faced assistant, who had till this moment been seated
in a dark corner with a box in his hand. This box he now opened. It was filled with
paints, pigments, brushes, powders, pencils, Indian ink, and hares' feet.

" Caro Kablabkzone," said the General of the Jesuits to the stout, pale monk, " tu
cimuppa bitto ! "

Kablabkzone bowed, and, with a light hand and small brush, put a few lines here, a

few lines there, rubbed a little more yellow into his face, and the man (in reality a native

of Limerick) was transformed into a most perfect Chinaman. [Is it certain that this

emissario is not one of those who hang on behind the Chinese Ambassador's coach as he

drives about London ? Let Cardinall M-nn-g answer. He knows, and if he will only-

* * * * j .j.

Just at this moment a piercing scream rang through the apartment. A secret door was
suddenly thrown open, and a beautiful nun, pale and dishevelled, rushed into the apartment
and threw herself at the knees of the General.

f The break and asterisks are ours.—En.
(To be continued.)

have every confidence. I have already spent
hundreds, I may say thousands, in unearthing the
machinations of the Jesuits in this country—I
have been content to bear the obloquy cast upon
me by the satellites of the Eoman Secret Monastic
Societies—and, alas ! I have actually been held
up to suspicion (how baseless my conscience and
constituents best know) of being myself a Popish
Emissary!!—and this too by the once eminent
Protestant Champion, Mr. N-d-g-te, who, I fear,
is after all but an unconscious tool in the hands
of astute Cardinals and wily Italian Prothona-
tanis. I defy Dr. M-nn-g and all his works (not
one of which I would ever read, nor even accept
as a birthday present), and dare the whole Con-
sistory and College of Bishops and Council of
Seminarists to disprove in detail any one of the
Facts, or contradict any single one of the state-
ments which I shall put before the public in this
true and thrilling narrative, which should rouse
all England from its torpor, and cause Parlia-
ment to send a carefully-selected body of firemen,
with hose and hatchet, into the cellars of the
house.

I would not employ a policeman or fireman if
I had my way, unless he were previously examined
by a competent Protestant Committee, and had
received from the examiners a certificate of his
thorough acquaintance with the Catechism, and
had taken a good strong anti-Popish oath with-
out evasion, reservation, or mental equivocation
whatsoever. For me, I would go to the stake
cheerfully for my opinions, and I should be very
glad to see others go there too, and remain there.
For my part, I do not think I should care to do
more than go to the stake for my opinions, get
my opinions, and come back again. For the sake
of the Protestant cause I would give up almost
anything except, perhaps, my pipe, which is a
great comfort to me when I am stumping at
Peterborough, and which I miss in the House.

I shall go on with this Novel as long as I can,
in order to expose the system of tyranny and
duplicity which keeps an excellent nobleman out
of his property simply because he is a butcher,
and, therefore, opposed to Lenten diet and fish on
Fridays. But my time is fully occupied, and my
leisure moments I devote to singing lessons.
When next asked to sing I shall do so—and
charge for it.—G. "W.

Notes by the talented Author.

Of course I limit
or sworn to

! I limit myself entirely to facts, either within my own personal and peculiar knowledge,
by those in whom, from their position and exceptional opportunities of observation, I

CRYSTAL PALACE IMPROVEMENT.

Is the Crystal Palace worth preserving ?
This is a question not raised in a pamphlet
by Mb. Gladstone, but by the Lord
Mayob, at a meeting of public-spirited
gentlemen; held the other afternoon at
the Mansion House, to consider " the
best means to maintain and preserve
the Crystal Palace for the use of the
people, in fulfilment of the objects for
which it was originally founded." They
ultimately resolved that, "in view of the
great public advantage of the Crystal
Palace, it is desirable that it should be
maintained for the public," and appointed
a Committee to confer with the Directors to
that end. Thus the question before the
meeting was answered in the affirmative,
but not absolutely. They voted the Crystal
Palace worth preserving to effect the
objects for which it was^founded, and not
others.

The former they contemplate promoting
by a large and liberal scheme for " the
cultivation of arts, sciences, and manu-
factures, and the providing of good and
elevating recreation for the public," and
for those who join in the undertaking, " a
substantial return in the shape of valuable
works of Art."

Among the objects for which the Palace
was designed, rope-walking, circus-riding,
and'Cockney diversions in general were not
included. So Punch heartily wishes, under
new arrangements, better luck to the Crystal
Palace, and a return to the original inten-
tions.